


The 100 - Another Story

by Potter4



Series: Falling [1]
Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 (TV) RPF, The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Artist Clarke Griffin, Bisexual Clarke Griffin, Canon Lesbian Relationship, Clarke Griffin/Lexa Smut, Commander Lexa (The 100), Community: ff_100, Endgame Clarke Griffin/Lexa, F/F, F/M, Female Characters, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Smut, Lesbian Sex, Multi, POV Clarke Griffin, POV Female Character, Slow Burn Clarke Griffin/Lexa, Smut, The 100 (TV) Season 2, The 100 (TV) Season 3, Top Lexa (The 100), War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:34:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 36
Words: 67,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25991437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Potter4/pseuds/Potter4
Summary: Set after season 2. Carries on from when Clarke leaves Camp Jaha.Clarke walks for a few days when she comes across a figure in the woods.The Ice Nation are still after Clarke, but it is not just Clarke they want. An attack is coming, Sky crew are disappearing. Will Clarke come back in time to help? Will she find a way again to save her people.Give this story a read to find out!First time doing anything like this, so please be kind, but feedback is greatly appreciated.
Relationships: Clarke Griffin & Lexa, Clarke Griffin/Lexa
Series: Falling [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2140443
Comments: 105
Kudos: 682
Collections: Clexa FIcs, the 100





	1. Chapter One - Into the Woods

Chapter One – Into the Woods

End of season 2

It has been two days since Clarke walked away from Camp Jaha. Two days since she murdered an entire population. Thinking about it makes her feel sick, a couple of times she actually has been, but she knows she has barely eaten since her journey home from Mount Weather and can’t afford to lose any more sustenance. She tries to think about something else, but the only thing that comes to mind other than the mountain is those green eyes, and the moments before they turned away. She hadn’t had much time to think about her feelings with focusing on trying to get her friends back. She knew there was something there, after how the kiss had made her feel, how she just melted into Lexa, and how just for a moment she forgot she was on the cusp of battle, how it made her forget all the things she had to do on the ground, even made her forget about Finn. That’s when she knew there was something. But she didn’t realise how much she cared until she felt how much it hurt, watching Lexa walk away, feeling the betrayal way worse than she probably should have. She loved Finn. She knows she did. But, even seeing Finn kissing Raven, didn’t hurt that much compared to realising what Lexa had done. Since the moment Finn kissed Raven, it was different, she never felt for him the same, that was when it ended for Clarke, even though it continued to upset her, that’s when she started to move on. Maybe that is why it was so easy to kiss Lexa. It felt wrong because Finn had just died, but she knew even when she kissed him goodbye, she didn’t feel the same as she once had, it was more heart breaking because he had become like family to her. Still, it was too much, and although she had wanted to keep kissing Lexa, it was too soon for her. Now, all she would want to do is kill her, after what she made Clarke do, what now Clarke has to live with.

The further she walks the lighter she already begins to feel. So far, she has found some berries and water at a stream she came across. But with a rough cold night’s sleep against a tree last night, she needs to find food and a better place to sleep tonight. Night is already drawing in, so she picks up her pace, heading for the tree line, away from the stream that she had been following.

Part of Clarke just wants to keep walking until she can’t walk anymore, just to let herself wither away and disappear. She feels like she would deserve it after all of the blood she has on her hands. However, just as she had that thought for the thousandth time today, she glimpses a small fire burning in the distance. She reaches for her gun and slowly begins to approach the flames. She’s tired, she knows she should lift her feet more, so she doesn’t make so much noise, but she’s too exhausted and hungry to care. Her plan is to keep to the shadows and wait until whoever it is falls asleep, and hopefully there will be left over food to take.

As Clarke gets closer, she sees a figure sat by the fire, their back to her resting on a fallen log. It is not long before the smell of freshly cooked meat reaches Clarke’s nose. She can hear her stomach growl over the crackling flames. The night sky is clouded, and blocks out the shine of the moon, creating a blackness throughout the forest. The only light coming from the flames. 

“There is plenty for two” said the figure, in a light female voice. “To be honest you would be doing me a favour, I’ll end up eating too much that my stomach hurts, I have eyes bigger than my stomach,” the figure laughs out. The figure doesn’t move, she just continues to eat her meat, looking at the fire. Clarke hesitates, debating on her next move. But then the smell of the meat hits her nose again, and decides she has nothing to lose. 

Clarke walks a wide berth around her to the other side of the fire and sits on the leaf covered ground, on the other side of the flames. The figure stands and grabs what looks like a rabbit on a stick and hands it from a distance to Clarke. “Thanks” Clarke mutters as she reaches for the offered food. As Clark takes the meat, her gaze meets a pair of bright green eyes, for a moment, she freezes and nearly drops her food. She quickly recovers when the grounder smiles and it is not the familiar smile she was expecting. She had straight, light brown hair, that was loose, hanging just below her shoulders. She had armour lay on the ground to the side, that housed a bow, but Clarke could see the knife that she still kept at a thigh. Clarke sat back and started to enjoy the rabbit meat. It was the best thing she had tasted in days, since the food she was served in Lexa’s tent when they were going over the plan. The plan that changed. “Plans don’t last long in battle.” Thinking of the memory made Clarke quickly lose her appetite. She managed to swallow what she was eating, then kept the rest of the food in front of her, giving her something to look at other than the stranger. 

“Something wrong with the meet” the girl asked?

“No not at all, it’s just … I lost my appetite a little.” Clarke replied. 

The girl seemed to accept that and nodded. “I’m Aria kom Trikru.”

“Clarke,” Clarke supplied. 

“I know who you are,” Aria said. Before Aria could finish speaking, Clarke automatically went to hover one hand over her gun. “I was in the battle with Mount Weather, well I guess you can’t really call it a battle.” Aria half laughed. “I am just on my way home, back to my village. It is about another day’s walk from here.”

Clarke didn’t know what it was about this girl, but for some reason she felt safe being around her. Aria mustn’t be a few years older than Clarke if that, but Clarke could tell she had seen a few battles, although her smile remained kind. Clarke slowly began to move her hand back to resting on her leg, but not too far from her gun.

Clarke knew what the commander did wasn’t Aria’s fault, but she couldn’t’ help but say; “your commander betrayed me, my people could have died in that mountain because of her.”

“Your people didn’t die in the mountain?” Aria asked, suddenly her interest was piqued and she sat up slightly straighter, but still leaning on her log. 

Of course, the grounder would not yet know of what happened after they retreated. “No, they survived.” Clarke said through gritted teeth. She knew that this was not what the grounder was asking, she wanted to know how that was possible without the grounders, but Clarke couldn’t bring herself to talk about it tonight. 

Again, Aria only nodded, and Clarke internally thanked this kind stranger for not asking further questions. Aria reached over the small fire and handed Clarke her drink. Clarke took it and had a few much needed gulps, then passed it back with a nod in thanks. Clarke reached her palms out to the fire and enjoyed the warmth that was spreading through her body. Last night she had been so cold, she barely managed to warm up today. With the fallen orange leaves, and the cooler air at night, if her memory from her earth lessons were correct, it must be becoming autumn. 

Suddenly, Clarke’s head whipped around to a howl that was coming from behind her, deep in the trees. “Don’t worry, they are a good few mile away from us and won’t come close to the fire.” Aria tried to calm Clarkes worries. 

Clarke again focused on the flame and tried to relax, eventually her eyes became heavy and as she was drifting to sleep, she heard Aria humming something familiar. Before she could remember where she had heard it, exhaustion from the past couple of days of nonstop walking, took over her and she fell asleep.


	2. Chapter two - Goats

Chapter Two – Goats

Clarke slowly stirs awake. The fresh morning is the first thing Clarke feels when she wakes up. The darkness of the night has gone, and an early morning fog is covering the forest around her. Clarke stretches, feeling the soreness of a full night’s rest after a long day of walking, has brought her. The fire has been put out and Aria is nowhere in sight. A panic rises in Clarke and she jumps to her feet, scanning the forest. 

“Worried I left without you Clarke?” Came a voice from behind one of the trees near to Clarkes right. How did this girl know? Clarke wasn’t even sure why she was panicking. But that was the reason... she didn’t want Aria to go without her. She didn’t know what she planned to do when she left Camp Jaha, all she knew is she couldn’t stay. But the thought of spending even another day wandering aimlessly through the woods, brings dread to Clarke. She didn’t know if going with the grounder to her village was a good idea either, but she didn’t have many other options. 

“No,” Clarke lied, “just thought I heard something.”

“Right. Of course, you did,” Aria said smirking. “Come on” she gestured, waving her arm for Clarke to follow. She winked. “This way.” Aria clearly had already packed everything up, but Clarkes left over rabbit, was resting against the log Aria had once been sitting at last night. Clarke rolled her eyes at Arias smugness, grabbed the left-over rabbit, and began to eat it as she started to follow Aria in the direction she had pointed. 

“So Clarkey, I am sorry but I’ve got to ask ... what brings you out into the woods on your own?” Aria says, as she continues to lead the way beside Clarke with ease. She clearly knows the forest very well.

“It’s Clarke” Clarke muttered annoyed, trying to keep up and not trip at the same time. 

“mmhmmm” Aria responds, clearly with no care of getting her name wrong. 

Clarke let out a deep sigh and paused for a moment, they had just come out into a clearing, that has an edge not far in front. The edge overlooks an incredible view of the forest and the mountains that are entwined. Part of Clarke just wants to leave and never see this girl again, so she doesn’t have to speak of the past. But Clarke knows she has nowhere to go, and she will have to tell her at some point any way. 

Keeping her gaze on the view in front, Clarke finally tells Aria; “I couldn’t stay, not after what happened in the mountain. Seeing their faces everyday will just remind me of what i had to do.” Clarke took another deep breath and closed her eyes. She could feel Aria’s gaze on her from where she stood, slightly behind her shoulder. “I killed them, I killed them all, every man, woman and child in that mountain.” Clarke kept her eyes closed, taking in the fresh air as the moments passed, trying to focus on not throwing up. 

Clarke hadn’t really heard Aria be serious yet, her voice always seemed to have a light, playfulness to it. A couple of times, Clarke had thought how great Aria, Monty and Jasper would get on, like three peas in a pod. But when Aria spoke this time, Clarke heard nothing but sadness. “My Aunt got taken by the mountain. It was a couple of years ago, we were visiting Polis, I decided to stay longer, when my Aunt had to get back home to help my parents with the harvest. They got her on the way back.” A few moments passed. “If I had not stayed, if I had gone back with her, I could have protected her. At least that is what I let myself believe for a long time.” 

Clarke understood Aria’s guilt. She has replayed that night at the mountain a thousand times already. Thinking of what she could had done differently, what she could had said to Lexa to change her mind. If Lexa had stayed with her and not gone to stop the shooter. If she could had spoken to Cage, or even the people, offered them bone marrow donations instead, maybe the people would had stopped cage and took the offer. She was in the control room she could had spoken to everyone instead of cage, maybe they didn’t know what was happening to her friends next door, maybe they would have heard her warning, when cage’s blind rage didn’t. She could had done something differently, so that they didn’t have to die, and that was what tore Clarke up on the inside. 

“I know this isn’t what you need to hear right now” Aria continued, “but you didn’t just save your people in that mountain, you saved all the lives that would had been taken in the years and generation to come. You got thousands of the clan’s revenge, you got rid of every child’s fear of playing too far out into the forest. You took away our fear of growing up in the shadow of the mountain.”

It didn’t make Clarke feel any better, but maybe one day it would help her a little. Clarke gave Aria a slow understanding nod, and Aria returned it with a smile, once again making everything lighter. She didn’t know how Aria did that, how just being around her made everything feel just that little bit less heavy. It gives Clarke hope that made one day she won’t feel like her insides are being torn apart anymore.

They carried on foot in silence for a few more hours, until the sun was high in the sky. Aria stopped at a small clear river, she sat her things down on a large rock near the water’s edge and started to take off her armour. Clarke approached another large rock and perched on the edge, facing the water. Just as she was turning her head to face Aria, she got sprayed with a huge splash. Aria was giggling from where she swam in the water like a little kid. “Sorry” she got out in between laughs. 

“Careful there are people eating monsters in there,” Clarke shouted out to Aria. Aria just continued to laugh, whilst creeping forward to where she could stand. “Don’t worry Clarke, this river comes from the Yongdri Mountain, and passes through the outskirts of my village, I have been in these waters since I was a babe. It is perfectly safe.” Clarke now realised what little clothes Aria had on, seeing the top of her wrap that is covering her breast as she stands a little more out of the water. For some reason Clarke doesn’t feel uncomfortable around Aria, like as if she was swimming with Raven or Octavia, not that Clarke was either of their favourite person right now. “Come on in Clarke, the water is great and no offence you smell as bad as a reaper.”

Clarke did know she probably smelt, and it was probably best not to turn up at Aria’s village, offending anyone. So, Clarke slowly started to undress down to her underwear and carefully started walking in, not wanting to go to deep as she couldn’t swim. 

Aria could see the fear on Clarke’s face and knew it was more than just monsters. “Remind me to teach you how to swim when we get back to my village, it is a pretty pointless way to die when it could had easily been avoided,” Aria offers with a shrug, and goes onto her back floating next to Clarke, doing the odd back stroke to keep her from moving. 

“Why are you being so nice to me? Letting me come to your village with you?” Clarke had to ask. 

“There are nice people you know Clarke, you should try being less pessimistic, it’s a real downer,” Aria said with a smile. “Besides, even if I wasn’t my caring, lovable self, I’d have to look after you now, I owe you for saving my people from the mountain.”

“Lexa saved your people from the mountain,” Clarkes smile faded quickly.

“The commander won the battle Clarke, but you won the war.” With this Aria dipped under water. When she popped back up, she added, “and you should really stop calling her Lexa, someone might have your tongue for that” Aria informed Clarke brushing her wet hair out of her face. 

“They could try,” Clarke responded, beginning to wash her face and body. The water was oddly warmer than Clarke had suspected for this time of year. 

Aria responded with a deep laugh. When the laugh settled, she said “you must have been close.”

“Huh?” Clarke said stunned, not looking up to avoid Aria noticing the heat in her cheeks.

“You and the commander, if you call her Lexa so freely, even when she is not around.”

Clarke takes a minute. “I thought we were, but it was a lie,” Clarke didn’t know why she admitted that, she should had just denied it. But luckily Aria didn’t ask any more questions. 

Once they were washed, they sat on the rocks to dry in the midday sun. The fog had cleared some hours ago and the sky was clear and blue today. Clarke ate some dried meat that Aria had offered her from her pack and some water. Then once they were dry, they got dressed and carried on walking. 

“We should be at my village by nightfall.” Aria told Clarke.

Sometime later as the sun was beginning to set, they steered away from the river they had followed, into some trees, but it wasn’t long before they came to a clearing. There were rows of crops either side of the path, Aria and Clarke walked along. As they grew closer to the small farm house that was positioned to the far side of the clearing, Clarke could begin to hear some weird noises, from a building about 100 feet from the house. “Are those chickens?” Clarke asked, moving her hair around her ear to hear better. 

“They are, and we have a cow and a couple of goats.” Aria replied.

“No way, I have always dreamt of seeing a goat.” Clarke beamed.

Aria arched her eye brow looking in Clarkes direction, as Clarke looked out at the building where the noise was coming from longingly. “You dream of seeing a goat?” Aria stopped and leaned over her knees laughing so hard, she had to hold her belly with her free hand. 

“What, we didn’t have animals in space.” Clarke says cross, with her hands on her hips, not amused by Arias laughter. 

“Right, right, sorry I forgot.” Aria said trying to collect herself, her eyes having a slight tear in them from the laughter. “We can go and see the animals first thing in the morning, but I’ve got to warn you, if you want to stay here for a while whilst you figure things out, you will be sick of seeing the animals after my ma and pa set you to work.” Aria told Clarke.

Although it was a warning, it made Clarke smile at the kindness of this stranger, offering her a place to stay. 

They continued on towards the lit house.


	3. Chapter Three - Wanheda

Chapter Three – Wanheda

The air was dropping chilly, even in the coat Lexa had given her, she could feel the chill of the night coming. Clarke was glad they didn’t have to spend another night outside. Although usually she had been enjoying sleeping under the stars, it was different when it was cold. It made it much harder to sleep. Thinking about it as they approached the farm hut, maybe they would make Clarke sleep outside “I hope I will at least have a blanket” Clarke thought to herself. As they got closer, the small hut in the distance was not what Clarke had expected. Now she was closer, she could see it was a lot larger than she had realised and well built. It looked two story high, built from logs, with a chimney on the top with smoke coming out of it, and an orange glow lighting up the window on the bottom left of the house. They did not have glass windows, but what looked like shutters to close. 

Before Clarke could take in any more, the door of the house swung open. A tiny person flew out of the house and nearly knocked Aria over as he collided into her. He was a small boy, no taller than her waist in height, with a mop of mousey blonde hair. 

“See I told you I’d survive,” Aria told the little boy as she embraced him.

The boy stood back and wiped away a tear. “Good, or I would have had to kill you myself if you had died” the little boy said, standing a little bit straighter. 

“Oh, is that so,” Aria said seriously, with her hands on her hips and one eyebrow slightly raised. A moment later Aria dropped her pack and started her attack on the little boy, tickling him.

“It is ... especially if you didn’t make it back for our annual winter trip to Polis.” He managed to get out in between giggles. “Ok, ok stop!” he begged.

Aria stopped her assault and took a step back. 

This is what Lexa had given to her soldiers, the chance to come home to their families. Clarke knew this but it didn’t ease her anger, she knew it was Lexa’s soldiers’ lives that would had been lost in the battle, compared to the handful of Ark guards who were with her, but still. 

The boy looked at Clarke, clearly noticing her gun. “Who is your friend Ar?” the boy asked with his eyebrows creased together. 

“This is Clarke, leader of the sky people. She helped defeat the mountain.” Aria told the boy.

His mouth dropped open and he was stunned silent for a minute. Clarke and Aria gave each other a confused look. Once he managed to recover himself, all he could say was “Wanheda.”

The boy turned quickly on his heels and disappeared back inside. 

“What’s Wanheda?” Clarke asked turning to Aria. 

Aria looked concerned. “It means the Commander of Death.”

Before Clarke could respond, the little boy was back pulling what looked to be his parents behind him. The woman had brown hair tied back into a bun, a little darker than Aria’s, but held the same Green eyes. The man’s hair on the other hand was a mousy blonde hair, similar to the little boys, but held bright blue eyes. 

The man stepped forward, whilst the woman held her son back in front of her, her arms over each of his shoulders, hands clasped in front of him. As the man edged forward, one foot in front of the other, eyes sweeping the tree line around the crops, past Aria and Clarke. “Quick, quick,” he hushed, signalling for them to quickly get inside. They stepped into the house and the man quickly shut the doors behind them. He then turned to Aria and pulled her in for a hug and a kiss on the top of her head. Before he could even begin to pull away, the woman stole Aria and took her into an embrace of her own. 

Aria took a small step back. “Ma, Pa, what’s going on?” Aria asked.

Her father glanced behind her to where Clarke awkwardly stood, in what Clarke could only assume was some living room of sort. 

“Word has spread of the defeat of the mountain. Of the Mighty Wanheda, who slaughtered the people that lay within it.” With the word Slaughter, Clarke felt a stab to her gut. “Word came this morning from the Ice Queen, she has put a bounty on Wanheda.” Finished Aria’s father. 

Clarke couldn’t completely understand what he was talking about, but what Clarke could gather, was she was this Wanheda person and there was a bounty on her head. This made Clarke step back, aware they may want this bounty.

“Don’t be silly Clarke, you're safe here, right ma and pa?” Aria said, when she noticed Clarkes caution.

“Of course, you are more than welcome here. None of Trikru would so much as swap words with the Ice Nation, and certainly would not do the Queens bidding. However, it is still best to take caution and keep who you are secret whilst you are here.” Aria’s dad suggested.

Clarke nodded, “Thank you so much, but I do not want to put your family in any danger.”

Aria half laughed and assured Clarke “even if they found you Clarkey, we wouldn’t be harmed, at least not killed. Ice Nation aren’t that stupid to break the coalition, at least not yet.” 

Clarke was processing Aria’s words when her mum spoke up. “I am sure you both are exhausted, there is some leftover stew in the kitchen and you are welcome to the spare room. I am Dauriel, Aria and Noahs mother, what did you say your name was again sweetie?”

“Clarke,” Clarke replied smiling back at Dauriel, the motherly warmth not lost on her. “Thank you, you and your family are too kind, I hope to repay you in any way I can.”

“Lucky for you its harvest season, the more hands the better at this time of year,” Dauriel said as she turned to leave into another part of the house, pulling along the small boy with her.

Clarke was relieved she might finally have something to focus on and take her mind off things, as well as being able to earn her keep.

Aria lead them to the back of the House where the kitchen was, they sat down at a wood table and had their stews in silence, both mulling over the events of the evening. Once they were finished. They headed up stairs and along a hall passing a door before they stopped at the next. 

“This is your room here, mine is just the next one along, and we have an outhouse just out back.” Aria told Clarke, as she pushed the door open. There are extra blankets in the chest under the window, if you get cold.”

“Thank you,” Clarke said with a gentle smile and tired eyes.

Aria gave a slow nod, passed Clarke the oil lamp she carried and turned to carry on down the hall.

Clarke closed the door behind her as she entered the room. It wasn’t small, but it was simple. A single bed against the wall on the right, and a wardrobe to the left with a warm rug mixed with yellows and oranges to separate them. 

The only unexpected thing in the room, was an old bookcase in the corner.

Clarke walked over to the window and placed the lamp and her gun on the wooden chest that sat below it. She unbuckled her coat and lay it on the bed, then strolled over to where she spotted the books. With her family’s station, she had access to books on the Ark, but they were limited and by the time she was 16 she had read the ones available to her, many times over.

The bookcase was five shelves high and full to the brim with books, with a small pile on the ground next to it that wouldn’t fit. Clarke picked up the top book that lay on the small pile, she could feel the excitement building inside of her. The book was worn, but the spine was intact and it seemed to have all the pages. It felt like a life time, since Clarke just had the time to sit and get lost in a book, in another world far from hers. “Through the stars.” Clarke laughed at the irony of the book title, when she was in space, she only ever wanted to read about the ground. But now, as she stood in this farmhouse, with strangers and her family and friends’ miles away. She smiled down at the book, of the memories of a simpler time, and hugged it tight to her chest as she made her way over to the bed. She moved the lamp and her gun to a small table by the side of the bed and rested the book next to them. Once she took her boots off and got comfy, she grabbed the book to read. Clarke prayed, that this may give her a few moments of peace, to escape the ground and everything she has had to do since she landed on it, too fall into another world in the book. But deep-down Clarke knew there was no escape, eventually the book would end.


	4. Chapter Four - A Cute Awakening

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would just like to say a huge thank you for anyone who has took the time to make it this far! Please let me know your thoughts, I would appreciate any feedback, and feel free to ask any questions you may have.

Chapter Four – A Cute Awakening 

Clarke awoke from one of the most restful sleeps she has had in a long time. She doesn’t even remember falling asleep, which probably explains the book still open, resting on her stomach. She rubs her sleep from her eyes and begins to sit up. When she turns to face the side, she is startled, when she sees a big pair of green eyes just inches from her own. They are not her favourite pair of green eyes, nor the ones she was use to from the past couple of days. 

“I’m Noah, ma and pa said I shouldn’t wake you,” the kid from last night said, a little too enthusiastically for first thing in the morning.

But Clarke couldn’t help but feel a huge grin already forming as she replied. “Don’t worry your secrets safe with me, I’m Clarke, nice to meet you Noah” Clarke reached out her hand for him to shake, now that she sat completely upright.

Noah just stared at it and said, “what are you doing? Do you want me to grab your wrist like my parents do with people sometimes?” 

“Kind of but my hand, this is how we greet each other" Clarke explained.

“Why?” Noah asked, still staring at Clarkes hand looking confused.

“Well erm, I guess I don't really know,” Clarke responded honestly, realising she had never really thought about it before. “We just shake each other’s hands.”

Noah reached out with his tiny hand and shook Clarkes from side to side. “Like that?” Noah asked pleased with himself for the shake. Clarke giggled back and told Noah “something like that.” She drew her hand away and went to put her book on the side. 

“I like that book,” Noah told Clarke after noticing what book she had. “But it is my sisters’ favourite.”

Clarke was about to respond when Dauriel knocked on the already half open door. “Oh Noah, what are you like. I am so sorry if he woke you Clarke, he hasn’t stopped talking about you since you arrived last night.” Clarke could see Noah’s cheeks go red and take a shy step away. 

“Oh no, not at all, I was already awake before he came in.” Clarke lied to Dauriel, and gave Noah a quick wink, only he could see. With this his cheeks turned even darker and directed his eyes to the floor. 

Dauriel smiled and said “there is some breakfast downstairs on the kitchen table when you are ready Clarke.”

“Thank you, I will head down in a moment.” With Clarkes answer Noah and Dauriel left Clarke and headed downstairs.

Clarke stretched and got out of bed. She hesitated for a moment, deciding on whether she needed her gun. Although she felt safe here, and for some reason already trusted Arias family, she also knew there was now a bounty on her. She still couldn’t understand what she had done to cross the Ice Queen, but she thought better safe than sorry and pulled her gun to its usual spot, in its holster at her side. She decided against her coat and headed down stairs. 

Clarke decided to use the outhouse before she headed into the kitchen. It wasn’t as bad as she had imagined, she had expected it to smell horrendous, and just a hole in the ground. But there was a wooden seat and the smell was not terrible, with a wash bowl to wash your hand, and a broken mirror that hung above it. It was the first time she had seen herself in a while and it shocked her to see how tired she looked, but at least she looked clean from the river. 

When she entered the kitchen, she was surprised to see a variety of fruit, cheese and bread. She wasn’t sure what she was expecting but she hoped they weren’t doing this just for her sake.

“Good morning Clarke, please take a seat, help yourself, I hope you slept well,” Aria’s father greeted her as she came into the room. 

“I did thank you,” Clarke replied as she took a seat at the table. Aria’s father sat at the head, with Noah to his right and Dauriel pottering around the kitchen. The table seated six and Clarke opted for the seat next to Noah, leaving the one to Aria’s fathers left, open for Aria or Dauriel. 

“Thomas, did you manage to fix the wheel on the wagon yesterday?” Dauriel asked her husband. Clarke made a mental note of Aria’s fathers’ name. 

“Yes honey, and I am going to pick up the new harness for Kianto when I go to the village tomorrow morning.” Clarke listened contently, whilst piling her plate with food; she was a lot hungrier than she had realised. 

“Let’s just hope Gilberts harness lasts until the end of the harvest.” Dauriel replied. 

“Are Kianto and Gilbert the goats?” Clarke asked after swallowing a grape.

Noah giggled “No they are out horses.” He told Clarke with his mouth still full of food.

“Aria never mentioned any horses.” Clarke said, trying to think whether she had forgotten that part. 

“Because she’s scared of them,” Noah said taking a sip of his orange juice. 

“She’s not scared of them, just a little wary since an accident she had on Kianto.” Thomas corrected, giving Noah a look.

“Where is Aria?” Clarke asked. Curiosity finally getting the better of her. She assumed she wasn’t down yet, but she couldn’t lie and say she didn’t notice her absence.

“Ahh yes, sorry I forgot you don’t know. With Aria being away for the commander’s army, our meat stores have run a little low, so she has gone hunting. She set off at first light and should be back in a few days.” Thomas told Clarke. A few days sounded a little odd to Clarke, from what she had been aware of it normally only took a day or two to hunt. But then again maybe she had to go far to find animals around here.

“Don’t worry she left you in good hands.” Dauriel assured with a smile, as she sat down next to her husband opposite Noah.

Clarke smiled back, “She did promise me to show me the animals, minus the horses of course.” Clarke said with a small laugh. “But I am looking forward to helping you ...”

“I can show you the animals!” Noah interrupted, practically dancing on his chair in excitement at the prospect. Clarke thought he couldn’t be older than 8, and he clearly had an adorable charm working for him. It must be hard for anyone to ever say no to him!

“Have you done your chores yet?” His mother asked, clearly already knowing the answer. 

“Not yet,” Noh replied in a disappointed voice, dropping his head slightly.

“Go on, get to it and you can give Clarke a tour after.” Dauriel told him.

Noah beamed at the idea, and quickly got up and put his plate away and practically skipped outside. 

“Don’t forget to feed the chickens in the outside coop as well as the barn.” Dauriel shouted after him. 

They sat in silence for few minutes, enjoying their last bit of breakfast.

“I hope you don’t mind me asking, but I was wondering if you could tell me a bit more about Wanheda and why the queen would want me?” Clarke decided to ask.

Dauriel and Thomas both exchanged a look, then Dauriel began to say; “see the thing is my dear, it is believed amongst the clans, that if you kill someone, then you get their power.” Clarke took a moment to take this in, it was clear the Ice Queen intended to kill her but she still couldn’t understand why.

“But I don’t have any power,” Clarke said confused.

Dauriel paused for a moment before she responded.

“Kill Wanheda and you command death.” Dauriel said seriously. 

Although the sickness in Clarke’s stomach never truly left, it hit her at full force again. Wanheda to Clarke, just sounded like murderer. A reminder of who she has become, maybe she did deserve to die. But she remembers the story of Costia that Lexa had told her and being anywhere near someone who could do such a thing was the last thing she wanted, let alone let the people believe she took her power. True or not, it was clear the grounders believed it.

“Just another day on the ground,” Clarke said with a forced smile.

Dauriel leaned across the table and placed her hand on Clarkes. “Clarke, you will be safe here I promise and you are welcome to stay as long as you like.” Clarkes smile turned into a genuine one, “thank you, I just hope I don’t cause you any trouble.”

“We were talking to Aria before she left this morning. We were thinking that rather than to keep you locked up here, we could teach you the grounder ways. With being so close to the mountain, most people in the village centre, will speak Tridgedasleng out of habit in case the mountain men were ever listening. Although everyone now knows about the defeat of the mountain, I imagine they will still always continue to use it. I could teach you some if you like?” Dauriel offered. Clarke took a moment to think about it and agreed it made the most sense. If she was going to live away from sky crew, she was going to have to learn the grounder language at some point. 

“That sounds like a brilliant idea, I would really appreciate if you have the time to teach me.” Clarke answered.

“Then it’s settled then,” Dauriel stood as she began to clear the leftover food, and Thomas moving to help. “If you head over to the barn, you will find Noah, I’m sure he can’t wait to show you around. The wardrobe in your room is full of clothes, you are welcome to borrow anything you would like.”

“Thank you,” Clark said, as she began to rise from her chair.

“Noah knows where to find us in the fields when you are finished.” Dauriel added.

Clarke nodded and headed in the direction of the door she had come in the night before. She decided her clothes would do for now and that she would get a change of clothes later.


	5. Chapter Five – A New Look

Chapter Five – A New Look

Clarke made her way over to the building that she had heard the animal noises coming from the night before. The barn seemed bigger than the whole house! Clarke entered through the open doors that were twice her height. To her left as she entered was bales upon bales of hay, nearly stacked to the roof, and lots lining the floor where Clarke walked. Just after the bales of hay, there were some small wooden stairs that lead to another open floor above. But the floor above only covered about a quarter of the other end of the barn, with balconies wrapped around the whole edge, with just enough room to walk on, and a wooden railing to make sure no one fell over. There was lots of different farm tools lining the walls. Clarke couldn’t see what else was up there, but along her right was two stables with horses’ heads poking out of them, and further along the chickens roamed free, some heading outside for the day, now that they had been fed. 

Clarke approached the horses slowly, steadying one hand out in front of her, to warn them she was getting close. She had learnt this from one of Lexa’s guards who had shown her how to ride before the mountain. Just as she could feel the warmth from one of the horse’s noses against her hand. Noah jumped up from behind the stable door, right next to the horse, making a terrifying sound. Clarke flew back, her heart racing out of her chest, letting out a squeal. Landing behind her on the other side of the barn in a pile of loose hay. 

Noah came out through the stable door that he could barely see over, closing the door behind him, all a while he was nearly crying with laughter. 

Clarke just looked at him, with a grin on her face shaking her head. He really was too cute to get mad at. 

“So much for the mighty Wanheda,” he said, walking over to Clarke, trying to calm himself, but only managing to go into another laughing fit once the words were out. 

Once he got close enough to Clarke, to where she sat on the ground with some hay in her hair. He reached out his hand to help her up. Clarke stretched up to reach his hand, but instead of pulling herself up, she pulled him down to join her in the pile of hay. 

Now Clarke and Noah were both on the ground laughing in hysterics. Noah lifted up his hand where it landed and found it was covered in chicken poo. They both looked at it and laughed even harder, Clarke even felt a tear running down her cheek. 

“Oh god,” Clarke said, “my stomach hurts, I can’t breathe.” After a few minutes more, they managed to calm themselves enough, to slow the laughing. Both taking deep breaths, to try and get back to normal. Clarke cannot remember the last time she laughed like that, it was not since she was younger and it really did feel amazing. Clarke hadn’t realised how much she needed it, but in that moment as she sat in a pile of hay, probably covered in chicken poo, she could not be more grateful for this little person, so full of life, so full of innocence. Here, she felt like she was no longer just surviving.

‐------------------‐----------------------------------

After they had shaken off the hay, and Noah had cleaned his hand. He showed Clarke around all the animals. And by all, she meant all! Apparently, he had a name for every animal, even all of the chickens and there was too many too count. Noah never stopped talking, he told Clarke how he was seven and half, how he is getting so good at fighting he nearly beat Aria the last time they sparred and how he’s learning how to cook and would love to cook for Clarke sometime. With the latter, Clarke bent down and kissed him on his cheek. “I would love that,” Clarke told him. Noah turned a deep shade of red, and continued to talk about a book he had just been reading. 

The goats were even cuter than expected, and Noah told her about how one was pregnant and would be due in a couple of weeks. This made Clarke giddy with excitement. 

Once they had finished the tour, although Noah clearly drew it out as long as he could, trying to impress Clarke. Noah showed Clarke over to a row of crops, his parents were working on. 

Dauriel explained the different sections and the different crops that grew and how they normally have two farm hands to help, but they gave them the day off, as some family had also returned from the war. The main crop they grew was corn, as well as some beans and a smaller area for some medicinal herbs. She taught Clarke about what colour the corn should be and how to twist and pull it. 

Clarke began to start on a section, as she thought over everything Dauriel had told her. The two farm hands were supposed to be taking the newly harvest crops, on the wagon tomorrow to the markets in Polis, and often took them to nearby villages to trade, as well as their own village named Elkwood. 

With the mention of Polis, all Clarke could hear was Lexa words outside Mount Weathers doors, “you should come with me to the capital, Polis will change the way you think about us.” The pain of the betrayal hit Clarke like it was happening all over again. She is working on the corn now, but all she can do is replay the last time she saw Lexa in her mind. “May we meet again.” Clarke closed her eyes and took a deep breath. No, she told herself, she needed to stop thinking about her, about the mountain, about the missile on Ton DC, or it will eventually tear her apart. Instead she let her mind drift to Aria. A smile managed to creep on to Clarkes face, it was weird, she barely knew the girl, but she was already starting to miss her being around and the lightness of the mood she always seemed to carry with her. With that thought, Clarke continued working on the crops, trying to think about anything else. 

Working all day in the sun was exhausting, Clarke was relieved when she saw the sun begin to settle. Apart from lunch, a couple of bathroom breaks, a few visits from Noah, who was also helping in another part of the field; Clarke had worked none stop. It felt good to do something useful, to be helping people in a different way for a change. 

After Clarke had ate, she went up to her room to finish the book she had started the night before. It wasn’t as she had expected, it was more science fiction. But still, in the moments when it described the darkness, and the sparkles that surrounded, Clarke could close her eyes and feel like she was back looking out of her bedroom window on the Ark, listening to her Dad watching an old football game in the other room. The bit about the red space snakes and the princess who came from living on the sun, to save a planet of blue little aliens was a bit of a stretch, but it was soon becoming her favourite book.

The next two days passed quickly; Clarke was enjoying the routine she was getting into. Dauriel had showed her a small lake, where they bathed that split off from the river Aria and herself had been following to the village. She had also been wearing the clothes from the wardrobe in her room. It was mainly filled with tight dark trousers and different coloured tunics that fit Clarke nicely, as well as some grounder underwear and some warmer clothes, which Clarke had not yet needed to wear. 

They had just finished dinner, as they sat in the living room by the fire. Clarke was sat on the floor in front of Dauriel, who was doing Clarkes hair. Clarke had no idea what “more grounder” meant, when Noah suggested it, but she trusted Dauriel to not make her look any worse than her messy hair she already had. Noah was sat on the floor kneeling next to Clarke, watching his mother work and encouraging Clarke it was looking good. Thomas was still cleaning the pots in the kitchen. Clarke closed her eyes and simply let herself enjoy being by a fire, with people who she was quickly coming to care for. 

Just as Clarke was starting to relax, listening to Dauriel humming coming from behind her where she sat. The front door swung open, and in stepped Aria with a facial expression Clarke couldn’t quite read.


	6. Chapter Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would just like to say thanks again to everyone who is taking the time to read this. I would also like to apologise for any confusion with my work. I am British and therefore, there may be some spelling that is different as well as some words you do not know. I appreciate those who have taken the time to google the meaning, but if I anyone is confused, please do not hesitate to ask me.  
> Thanks.

Chapter Six

“Aria what’s wrong?” Thomas asked as he came in through the kitchen. 

Aria closed the door behind her and rubbed her face in her hands. “I decided to cut through the Windashes farm,” she said with her head still in her hands. 

“Oh no, my dear,” Dauriel said, still continuing on seeming unfazed. Clarke was very confused what was happening. “How long did they keep you this time?” Dauriel continued to say. 

“Three hours!” Aria said exasperated, letting out a heavy sigh. 

Noah giggled from where he sat crossed legged, right next to Clarke. 

“Did they at least feed you this time,” Thomas asked, heading over to the chair opposite where Dauriel sat. 

“Yes, but they spent two hours discussing why me and Laurel couldn’t work things out, with Laurel sat right next to me!” Aria said taking her shoes off. Everyone seemed quite amused, apart from Aria that is. 

Aria plonked herself down into the rocking chair by her mothers. “Oh great, I get stuck with Mrs and Mr Windashe and your here, clearly replacing me with a new favourite.” Aria said gesturing to Clarke. 

“Don’t be daft Ar, they couldn’t replace you; you have never been the favourite. I am.” Noah said triumphantly from where he sat.

Aria just rolled her eyes. “I put the dried meat in the food stores.” Aria told us all, “I am so exhausted, I think I am just going to go straight to bed. Talk in the morning Clarke?” Aria said looking at her, beginning to stand up. 

Clarke nodded in response to Aria. Aria began to turn and walk away, but paused as she got to the stairs and turned back. “Nice hair by the way,” she said with a wink. “Suits you.” With that Aria disappeared upstairs. It left Clarke smiling, curious to what her hair looked like. She was glad Aria was back, she already began to feel a little lighter. 

Later on, Clarke was looking at herself in the mirror, her hair was completely all pulled back, but had several braids patterned into it. Dauriel didn’t have a hair bobble, but seemed to use Clarkes own hair to wrap around and secure it. Clarke liked her new look, and each day she was learning more Trigedasleng. Now Clarke was getting excited for when she could visit the village. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------

Clarke awoke by the cockerels, cock a doodle dooing. It was weird how well she had been sleeping, but she still often woke in the night with her nightmares of the past.

Clarke got up and got dressed, now she was more comfortable here she opted for sleeping in just a long tunic. Clarke had left her gun safely in her room, since the second day. It would had been a huge give away to the farm hands. She thought she would miss it, but it was quite the opposite, refreshing even. 

Once downstairs, she discovered Aria had already been and gone from breakfast, so Clarke decided to grab some bread and fruit and head out to find her, leaving the rest of the family to finish their breakfast at the table. 

Clarke couldn’t see Aria across the fields so she headed to the barn, eating her food on the way. She passed Freya and Darwin, the farm hands, giving them a quick hello as they were sorting out the equipment for the day, in front of the barn. Thomas told them that Clarke was their niece, Clary from the Kuta village further south. Darwin was a big guy, with long blonde hair and a beard. At first look, he could be quite frightening, but once you spoke to him, he’s very sweet, Clarke thought. Freya was the complete opposite to her brother, tinier than Clarke, and had the same coloured hair as her brother and they were both covered in tattoos. Freya was the fasted picker on the farm, and with Darwin’s strength, they made quite the team. 

Freya and Darwin didn’t end up going to Polis the day before, but to a nearby village instead. Word had arrived that they had a bad season, with many of their farmers gone for the Commanders army. So, Thomas and Dauriel had decided to help support the village instead. Clarke could clearly see they were not struggling here on the farm, but the generosity still shocked her, surely Arias family needed the trade. When Clarke had raised her concern last night at dinner, Dauriel simply smiled and just assured Clarke it was a simple decision as they needed it more, and if they were ever in trouble the favour would be returned.

Clarke had just been here for a short time, but she could see more clearly than ever, just how wrong her people had been about the grounders; they weren’t savages. A few of their ways have been harsh, but nothing worse than what they did on the Ark to survive. 

Clarke was brought out of her thought when she heard a familiar hum that she still couldn’t quite place, coming from the top floor of the barn. Clarke put the last bit food in her mouth, still chewing on her last bit as she reached the top. It was the first time she had been up here and the creaky floor board made her nervous. Who knew how old this building was, it didn’t look new like the house was. 

Aria’s eyes looked up and she stopped her humming at the sound of the floor boards. 

“Sorry I didn’t mean to disturb you,” Clarke said after she has managed to swallow her last bit of food. 

“No, it’s fine, I was just sorting my weapons out from the hunt.” Aria told Clarke, looking back down at the sword in her hand and continued to sharpen it. Aria sat on a hay bale with her back against a higher one, in a makeshift seat. Clarke went to sit down next to her. 

“I just wanted to thank you for bringing me here.” Clarke said, looking at the wall in front of her. It held a tapestry of some kind. To her left were the steps back down to the main barn and to her right, was another open barn door. It made no sense to Clarke as who would enter and exit that way, surely someone could easily fall out, but a lot of things about the ground still didn’t make sense to Clarke. 

Aria met Clarkes eyes from where she sat on Clarkes right and gave Clarke an understanding nod. Clarke didn’t need to say how she probably wouldn’t had survived much longer in the woods without her, or how, for some reason being here, was just what Clarke needed. She could tell Aria already knew all of that. 

“So, how was hunting?” Clarke asked, as Aria moved on to her arrow heads. 

“It was good, peaceful. I always feel like I can clear my head when I’m hunting, just me, the forest and the animals.” Aria said with a small smile at the thought. 

That sounded very appealing to Clarke. “Do you think you could teach me?” Clarke asked.

“What? To hunt?” Aria asked back.

“Yes, I could help get meat for your family, and besides, I don’t know if your family will put up with me forever, so it could be useful.” Clarke said with a grin. 

“I don’t know.” Said Aria with a playful grin, “I think Noah’s in love. I don’t think he’s planning on letting you go anytime soon.” Clarke’s grin now reached her eyes and she let out a short laugh, it was obvious he had a small crush on Clarke, and it made him even more adorable, if that was even possible. 

“I suppose your right.” Clarke replied. 

“But sure, I will teach you.” Aria offered, continuing to sharpen her arrow heads. 

They sat for a few minutes enjoying the sound of the animals below them. 

“Were the goats everything you dreamed of Clarke?” Aria asked trying not to laugh. 

“Everything and more,” Clarke said dramatically and they both fell into laughter. 

After the laughter stopped, Clarke asked Aria a question she had been wondering, “how come you don’t speak grounder, even to each other?” She had been thinking it for a few days. At first, she thought it was just for her benefit, but even when Freya and Darwin showed up on the farm, they spoke English too.

Aria’s eyebrow was raised, clearly amused by the use of the word grounder. But then began to tell Clarke the story. “We have spoken English as you call it, since the world was first destroyed. When the mountain men first made themselves known, the Commander at the time thought it would be best to speak a different language, one where we can communicate to one another without the mountain listening in. It didn’t take us long to realise the technology they still held, undamaged by the protection of the mountain, and soon figured out, they knew our plans and where we sent our people.” Aria told Clarke. Clarke carefully listened, taking in a small part of their history. “The new language quickly spread throughout the 12 Clans, as no Clan was immune to the Mountains reach. Trikru felt the most impact. But Delfrikru (Delhi Clan) and Quskejonkru (Blue Cliff Clan) shares their eastern border with the mountain, and Azgeda to the North was also often targeted. Some of the main trade routes are through Trikru, so all the other Clans were also affected one time or another. The Blue Cliff Clan were always the most paranoid and rejected the old language altogether and only speak Trigedasleng. But majority of the Clans, all speak the old language. The warriors and Polis favour Trigedasleng, but in the outer villages like ours, we always kept to the old ways.” Aria finished speaking and moved on to her dagger. 

“How is your ‘grounder,’ coming along Clarke?” Aria asked with a smirk and an emphasis on the grounder part. 

“It’s going good, your mum said after I learn some more, she will only talk to me in your language so I can pick it up faster or something. I’m not sure how that will go, but I hope it’s not any time soon.” She laughed. 

“You will learn it in no time Clarkey.” Clarke chose to just roll her eyes this time and not to bother correcting her.

“Speaking of learning...” Aria spent a good hour going through all of her different weapon with Clarke and in what situation it would be best to use them whilst out hunting. Mainly discussing in great length, the bow and arrow and spear. 

Not long after, they joined the rest of the family, ready for another day in the fields.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

The weeks soon past quickly for Clarke, she was content in her little bubble of the farm. They were nearly finished with their harvest, and were now starting to dig up the ground and get it ready for next years. Aria had taken Clarke hunting a couple of times, the last time she managed to track a boar, but missed the arrow by a good few inch. But Aria was ready with her spear, so they still managed to bring it home. Clarke practiced her aim most nights, at a tree behind the barn, switching between her dagger, spear and bow and arrow. 

She still had the odd nightmares but every day she felt a little lighter, she often thought back to what her dad used to tell her “Time heals everything.” She took hope in it, that one day this agony she carried with her would soon fade.

Dauriel and Thomas often joked she was their sky daughter, and it always brought a smile to Clarkes face, but also a guilty feeling that her mum was at Camp Jaha worried about her. She sometimes thought she may visit, just to let them know she was safe, but the sinking feeling in her gut that always hit her, soon always dismissed the idea. She knows she was probably being selfish, but she also knew, this was what she needed right now to be ok that she couldn’t go back, not yet.

Today everyone had the day off, Clarke had spent most of the morning practicing her aim again out by the old tree and taking breaks visiting the two new baby goats. They were exceptionally adorable, and Clarke visited them any chance she had. She then spent the afternoon beating Noah at chess. Clarke was thrilled when she found out they had the board game; the pieces were hand carved on a wooden board that all looked fairly new. 

But it was after dinner now and Clarke was lay flat on her bed, with a book above her head. She had gotten through a fair few over the past few weeks, but ‘through the stars’ was still her favourite. It really was an escape out of this world, and the princess ending up with the badass warrior girl who helped her, was an added bonus. 

Just as Clarke was turning to chapter seven of something called The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe; Aria burst into her room.

“Heard of knocking?” Clarke said startled, picking up her book from where it had fallen on the fall beside the bed. 

Aria just laughed and continued over to Clarkes wardrobe, opening it and ruffling through, looking for something. 

“My friend laurel, her parents have gone to Polis for a couple of days, so she is throwing an end of season celebration.” Aria informed Clarke whilst she was still going through the wardrobe.

“Isn’t that your ex?” Clarke said confused, sat at the edge of her bed watching Aria.

“Yes, my ex, we broke up years ago, it was a mutual thing, we have long been friends since. It is just her parents who are still hung up on it. I mean who can blame them, who wouldn’t want me dating their daughter.” Aria said twisting around to wink at Clarke over her shoulder. 

Clarke just laughed at her response. “So, what are you looking for?” Clarke asked.

“Ahhh here it is, knew it must be in here somewhere. Here put this on.” Aria said holding up a deep blue top. It was a loose halter neck. It was the least grounder thing that she had seen a grounder wear, since landing on the ground. 

Clarkes mouth was slightly open, “that’s beautiful Aria, but I thought I wasn’t supposed to leave the farm.”

“Oh, come on Clarkey, live a little. You speak enough Trigedasleng to get by and besides, everyone at the party will be speaking the old tongue. Word has spread my cousin is in town, they would start to get suspicious if no one sees you soon, like we are holding you captive or something.” Aria said convincingly. 

Clarke stayed silent debating the idea. It would nice to get off the farm, and Dauriel had just redone her hair this morning. It was now mainly down with a few braids weaved in to it, to hold it back.   
Aria could see Clarke hesitation. “It will be fun I promise.” Aria added as she went to lay the top beside Clarke on her bed. “It is less than a 10-minute walk from here, if you don’t feel comfortable, we will just head straight home.”

Before Clarke could answer, Aria was heading for the door. She called back over her shoulder, “I will meet you down stairs in 10.” And with that Clarke decided she didn’t have much choice. 

Clarke quickly got dressed into the top Aria had lay out, it seemed to fit ok, and decided to wear a pair of the dark brown leather trousers she had for a change and put her boots on. The air was surprisingly warm tonight, so Clarke decided not to take a jacket. She thought it would had been a lot colder by now but Aria had called it a late heat wave. 

Clarke headed downstairs to find Aria, waiting by the door, chatting to Thomas about something. 

“Why can’t I go too?” Noah said sulking by the fire.

“Because your seven.” Aria told her brother.

“Seven and a half,” Noah threw back.

Aria laughed and told Noah “I’m sorry Noah but I promise I’ll spar with you tomorrow evening yeah?”

Noah just nodded his acceptance, and Aria bid farewell to her Parents. 

“Be careful, and if anyone seems the least bit suspicious, promise me you will come straight home.” Dauriel demanded.

“I promise ma” Aria assured Dauriel.

“And I better not wake up to find your drunk self-passed out with the goats again.” Dauriel added with a laugh at the memory.

Aria just shook her head with a smile, and headed out the door, with Clarke close behind her. 

Aria had her hair pulled back and looked stunning as ever, in her tight trouser and red tight top that went loose as the end of her long sleeves. They walked falling into their regular chatter. It didn’t take long for them to start to hear loud voice and lots of laughing. The house that came into view was a lot older and a lot smaller than Arias and only one storey high. But the 20 or so people who were already there, seemed to be gathered outside around a fire. Clarke was thankful she chose not to wear a jacket, as she could already start to feel the heat from the flames in the air. There was a table behind the group, closer to the house that hosted a variety of what seemed to be Alcohol and some metal cups.

Aria guided them straight over to the table and poured two cups of something, Clarke couldn’t quite make out.

“Thanks.” Clarke said as she took a cup from Aria. Even once Clarke tasted it, she still had no idea what it was, but the burn to the back of her throat felt good. It had been a long time since she had a drink. There were multiple torches mounted to long sticks in the ground, dotted around, for some extra light in the growing darkness. 

Aria! You made it! Came a voice from behind them. They both swung around to see an advancing red head, coming in their direction. She pulled Aria into a hug, then took a step back and looked over at Clarke. “You must be Clary, Arias cousin! I’m Laurel.” Laurel said also taking Clarke into a hug. The girl clearly already had a little too much to drink, her breath was so strong it was enough to make Clarke a little light headed. 

“Oh no, I forgot I promised Piper I would be right back.” Before Clarke could even get out her hello, the girl was gone. Aria just laughed and pulled Clarke to follow her. 

“So, Clarke... see anyone you like?” Aria asked, as they made their way through the crowd, passing the fire, reaching a spot near a torch off to the side. More people were constantly streaming in. 

Clarke nearly choked on her drink. It had been the last thing she thought she was going to say. Clarke recovered her coughing and stared down at her drink. There had been a few people Clarke had past that she had thought attractive. But she knew she wasn’t interested in pursuing anything with them. 

Clarke responded still looking at her cup, with a simple “not tonight.” A flash of pain crossing her face, as she remembered the betrayal of Finn with Raven and the betrayal from Lexa. She didn’t think her heart could take any more pain, so she thought it was best to avoid it altogether.

“Well, if you change your mind, the baker’s boy Eoghan seems to have not stopped staring at you, since we arrived.” Aria nodded her head in the direction of a guy, stood with a similar drink in his hand across the other side of the group, talking to what looked like a couple of his friends. But clearly kept glancing up at Clarke. When Clarke made eye contact, she quickly looked away, meeting Arias green eyes instead. Reminding her of Lexa. Clarke took another few large gulps of her drink.

“Wow careful Clarkey that stuff will be a lot stronger than what you are used to!” Aria warned. But Clarke took another sip anyway, wanting to stop her thoughts of Lexa, of knowing she was the only person that held Clarkes interest right now. The fact that some part of Clarke still felt something for her, when the other part of her hated her, made things even the more frustrating for Clarke. 

Clarke tried to take her mind of things and asked Aria the same, “how about you?”

Aria nodded in the direction of a guy who was pouring himself a drink with his back turned to them.

“what’s his name?” Clarke asked.

“Samuel. We have known each other forever and just before I went off to fight, I thought we had a moment, where something may finally happen you know, but I guess I’m still waiting.” Aria said with a sigh. 

“Well, I sure know I could use a refill.” Clarke said looking from her now empty cup to Aria with a smirk. 

“Well in that case it would be rude not to refill my visiting cousins cup, then wouldn’t it.” Aria said with a grin back, understanding what Clarke was suggesting. Aria took Clarkes cup and swapped it with her own that was still rather full and headed in the direction of the drinks table and Samuel. 

15 minutes later, Clarke had nearly finished Aria’s drink too, and Aria was still over at the table laughing at Samuel. Clarke was starting to get restless, with a certain commander that kept popping up in her thoughts, the more she was alone and with the more alcohol she seemed to drink. She needed a distraction. Just as Clarke was about to turn to head over to Aria. She nearly collided with someone behind her. “I am so sorry, I wasn’t looking.” Clarke said quickly, only a few inches from the Guys face. 

“Don’t worry, it’s my fault I was in your way.” Said the guy who had been looking at her earlier. The guy was very good looking, with blue sparkling eyes and dark short hair. Clarke assumed it was the alcohol affecting her, but right now she didn’t seem to care, she just wanted to not think about Lexa any longer. She took another moment, staring at him and then did the only thing that she thought might help her forget. Clarke leaned forward and brought her lips to the guy, who’s name she couldn’t remember, with some force. They weren’t the same soft lips that had met hers in the tent not too long ago, but the baker’s son sure knew how to kiss, Clarke would give him that. Clarke slowly withdrew her hand that had landed on the back of his head, as she pulled away from his lips. The guy, who she now remembered was called Eoghan, stood with his eyes closed a moment longer. “Wow,” he said whilst opening his eyes to meet Clarkes. “I should get in your way more often.” He said with a cheeky smile. 

He gestured towards a bale of straw that wasn’t too far from them and Clarke followed him over to sit down. 

Clarke wasn’t sure how long it had been since she arrived, but Eoghan had just gotten up to go get them both another round of drinks, again. Which must be his third time getting up now. Clarke was pleasantly surprised with how this evening was going, and Eoghan was a lot more interesting than she first realised, and areal charmer. She had no idea where Aria was, but she didn’t particularly care, she just hoped she was also having a good time. 

Clarke looked up to who she thought would be Eoghan returning. But instead found a clearly pissed of girl, who was slightly swaying side to side. “I don’t know who you think you are, and me and Eoghan might be split up for now, but you need to back off, because we will end back up together soon.” The girl said glaring down at Clarke. 

Clarke stood up taking a step away from the girl, who had stood far too close. Clarke wasn’t sure what had gotten into her and she knew she should probably walk away and not draw attention to herself, but there was just something about this girl that couldn’t stop Clarke from saying; “I couldn’t care less who he ends up with, as long as he ends up with me tonight.” Clarke said with a slurr but somehow managed to add a wink, just to piss the girl off even more. But before the shocked girl could respond, Clarke added, “It is clear he doesn't care about you, if he turned his back on you. Why is it so hard for you to accept that.” Clarke said a little more seriously this time, she wasn’t sure if she was still talking about this girl and Eoghan, but Clarke just seemed to feel angrier and angrier. But before Clarke could even realise, she felt a huge pain in the side of her face and she was now looking up from the ground. 

Clarke soon remember, she wasn’t at a social gathering on the Ark, this was the ground and she was surrounded by grounders. Clarke managed to pull her drunken idiot self-up, and rushed into the girl, trying to knock her over. Even in the other girls’ drunken state, she was clearly more skilled than Clarke and had Clarke flipped over on her back in a matter of seconds. Clarke tried to get up again but with the alcohol and having the wind taken out of her, she’s stayed flat on her back. 

Suddenly, Clarke could here a few grunts from behind/above her and everything went silent, no more laughs or people talking, just silence. 

A slightly blurry hand appeared above Clarke, at first Clarke flinched thinking it was another attack. But the person the hand belonged to soon came into focus. 

Clarke let Aria pull her to her feet, but Clarke had to lean her weight a little on Aria for support, for a few moments whilst she gathered herself. 

Once Clarke finally got her bearings, she notices all eyes were on them and everyone was still silent, not one person making a sound. The girl who attacked Clarke, now was on the ground in front them, clutching her right arm. “If you attack my cousin, you attack me,” Aria announced loud and clear for everyone to hear. 

“I am sorry Aria if I had known...” The girl on the ground stopped speaking by Aria’s glare. And the girl just hung her head.

Aria turned to Clarke, “are you OK?” Aria asked concerned. 

“Yeah, the bruise on my face may ruin my good looks for a few days though.” Clarke managed to get out with a smile.

Aria laughed and said, “come on, let’s get you home.” Aria helped steady Clarke, and ended up half holding Clarke up, as they headed in the direction, they had arrived in. 

Clarke remembers briefly walking past a dazed Eoghan, still holding two drinks in his hand, trying to piece together what had happened in the 5 minutes he had been gone. But the rest of the journey home was a blur.


	8. Chapter Eight - The Hangover

Chapter Eight – The Hangover 

What Clarke assumed was the next morning, Clarke awoke to her usual morning wakeup call from the animals. Her shutters were closed, but some light creeped in through a crack. Her hand went to her head, where it was throbbing in pain. Her throat felt like she hadn’t drunk in days, and she soon noticed she was still wearing her clothes from the night before, minus her boots. She lay on top of her covers, trying to recall the events of the nights before. They hit her in full force and Clarke groaned at the memory. 

Clarke tried to sit up but, her whole body ached against it, probably from when she got slammed full force into the ground. Clarke settled for twisting her body enough to be able to reach the cup someone had left her, on the table at the side of the bed. Clarke closed her eyes as the cool water hit her dry throat, and she quickly gulped it down. Clarke regretted the decision just as quickly, as now she started to felt sick. Her left side of her face stung, when she accidently brushed her cheek bone. Clarke could tell it was already swollen.

Clarke decided against trying to move and let her body drift back off to sleep, in the hopes that the next time she woke up, she would be in less pain. 

\------------------------------------------------------------

Clarke woke again to a light knock at the door. 

The door pushed open and Aria came into her room with a plate full of food and a jug of water. 

“Hey, I didn’t want you to miss lunch as well.” Aria said, looking sorry for Clarke. “How are you feeling?”

Clarke managed to sit up against her pillow and back board and managed to speak in a raspy voice “better than I did earlier but still sore.” She gave a weak smile to Aria.

Aria put down the plate of meat and rice next to Clarkes bed and refilled her cup. She then took a seat next to where Clarke lay.

“I am really sorry about what happened last night. If I had known you were going to get hurt, I would never have taken you.” Aria said, full of regret, staring at the floor.

“Hey,” Clarke said inching closer to Aria the best she could, trying to hide her pain. “I am fine,” Clarke said putting her hand over Arias, getting her to meet her eyes. “I promise, I was actually having a really good time, well at least until the end. I don’t regret going at all” Clarke told Aria with a reassuring smile. 

“Really?” Aria asked sceptically.

“Really.” Clarke replied with a squeeze to Aria’s hand. Aria smiled back at Clarke.

“Is there anything you need me to do?” Aria offered.

“I would appreciate you helping me to the outhouse. My bladder feels like it may explode.” Clarke stated.

Aria laughed, instantly returning back to her usual self. “That would probably be those ten drinks you guzzled down last night.” Aria stood up and offered her hand out to help Clarke up.

Clarke reached for her hand and let Aria pull her up. “It was not ten drinks.” Clarke quickly corrected. 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever you say Clarkey.” 

“So, what did you end up getting up to.” Clarke asked with arched eyebrows, as they slowly approached the stairs. 

“I wasn’t ever too far from you, not that you would had noticed.” Aria laughed. “But I spent a while talking to Samuel, but nothing much came from it. So, I ended up catching up with some friends I hadn’t seen in a while.” Aria informed Clarke.

They carried on through the house in silence, it seemed like everyone must had been out working on the fields, which made Clarke feel a little guilty for missing out on the day. 

“Thank you, by the way.” Clarke said, stopping as she reached the outhouse to look at Aria. “For defending me.” Clarke added. 

“Of course Clarke, it’s what we do for family.” Aria said with a sincere smile in a rare serious moment. “But you could work on your fighting skills, she wiped the floor with you.” Aria said with a grin, changing the mood instantly.

“Hey, in my defence I was drunk.” Clarke defended herself.

“So was she.” Aria replied.

Clarke couldn’t argue with that.

“You can’t depend on your gun forever Clarke. When you are feeling better, I will give you some lessons. I am sure after a bit of practice you might have a fighting chance against Noah.” Clarke wacked Aria in the shoulder playfully in response to the last part. Clarke was fairly confident that she could take on a seven-year-old. But boy was Clarke about to be in for a shock with that one. 

“Sounds like fun, sign me up.” Clarke told Aria, before she closed the door to the outhouse, as she went inside.

\---------------------------------------------

It wasn’t long before Clarke was back sat with her legs hanging over the side of her bed, enjoying the food Aria had brought up. Aria had just left her to head back out to the fields, clearly feeling the effects of the alcohol far less than Clarke was. When Noah came running into her room. 

“Clarke! Your awake.” Noah nearly shouted out as he landed on her bed, nearly knocking her over with a hug. It was slightly painful but Clarke didn’t let it show as she didn’t want to upset Noah. “Aria said I couldn’t disturb you, even though I told her you wouldn’t mind. Right Clarke.” 

“Of course not,” Clarke said ruffling his hair, as they parted from the hug. Luckily Clarke had just put her plate down, before Noah came charging in. 

“I got you something.” Noah told Clarke. Disappearing back out of the room and reappearing again, only a minute later. This time carrying something. Clarke immediately recognised what he was carrying, but waited for Noah to show her, before she reacted. 

“Me and ma went to the market in the village this morning, and I know you said you like to draw, so when I saw this, I asked ma if I could get it for you.” The young boy said sweetly but nervously. 

He passed Clarke what looked like some sort of book and two pieces of thin charcoal.

The book was a light brown leather with a piece that wrapped around it to fasten it. Clarke, untied it and flicked through the empty pages. Clarke could already feel herself itching to draw. She closed it back up and looked at Noah’s wide, waiting eyes. 

“Noah,” Clarke breathed. “You have no idea what this means to me.” Clarke told him with a soft grateful voice. She stood up from the bed, feeling less achy than when she first woke, and took a step forward and bent down and gave Noah a kiss on the cheek. As she stood back, she could already see his cheeks turning his regular pink. His hand went to his cheek, gently touching where Clarke had kissed him. 

“Thank you she said.” 

Noah did an awkward nod and spun on his heels and ran out of the room. 

Aria had said she had made up a bath for Clarke to have after she had ate. So, Clarke rested her new sketch book down on her bed behind her and headed down stairs, into a room she didn’t often go into. It didn’t take long for Clarke to shed her clothes and sink in to the bath that stood in the middle of the room. She had only used this bath once before, usually opting for the lake, but she knew she wouldn’t make it to the lake today, so she was grateful to Aria; she knew how long it took to heat up the water. Aria had told her how they mainly only use the bath in the winter months. 

Clarke stayed in the bath until the water had begun to go cold and her fingers started to wrinkle. Then headed back upstairs, looking forward to using her new sketch book and pencils.


	9. Chapter Nine – The Hunter or the Hunted?

Chapter Nine – The Hunter or the Hunted?

It has been over four months since Clarke left Camp Jaha, since she had found Aria in the woods. Clarke was no longer the person she had been back then, she was now freer, stronger, but still held the weight of the past, although it was becoming easier to bare, maybe Clarke was just learning to live with it. 

Either Aria or Noah now sparred with Clarke most days. Clarke has even started to begin to beat them from time to time. Noah was a formidable opponent, but now her skill and speed had improved, her height and strength worked in her favour against the small boy. She had been training in hand to hand combat as well as with weapons. But Clarke still preferred to hunt and she had become exceptional good at it. 

Clarke and Aria had left the previous day to head out on a hunting trip; it was probably their last chance before it got too cold and the animals got too sparse. 

In a couple of weeks, Aria and her family were heading up to Polis for their annual winter trip. Clarke wasn’t sure how long they would be gone, but she used the excuse about it not being safe in case she was recognised, as a reason to stay behind. Aria offered to stay back with her, but she could see how much this trip meant to them, so she insisted that she should go. Clarke knew she probably wouldn’t have been recognised; she wasn’t sure if even her own people would recognise her anymore. She wore her hair in her usual hair style, all pulled up into a pony tail out of her way, with braids entwined with it, just like the first time she had it done. She now wore the winter leathers from the wardrobe, that were lined with fur, and even just the way she held herself, she knew was different. But the thought of being in the same place as Lexa, sent an unwanted rush of feelings through Clarke, the main one being anger. But she didn’t want to be angry anymore, she was tired of it, she just couldn’t seem to let it go. 

It was evening now and Clarke and Aria were sat around a small fire, finishing their stew. 

“Aria?” Clarke said looking at the fire in front of her.

“mmmm?” Aria responded, looking to her side at Clarke.

“You once told me, when we first met that you believed it was your fault for a long time. But now you don’t”. Clarke said still deep in thought.

It took Aria moment to realise what Clarke was referring to. Then she too looked into the fire.

“For a long time, I believed if I had been there that I could have done something. I replayed a thousand possibilities in my mind.” Aria paused contemplating her next words. “I guess in a way I was just punishing myself, it was a way of coping. Eventually I just took a step back and saw it differently. They had guns Clarke, if I had been there, they would have just taken me too. There is no point in dwelling on the past, what is done is done, it cannot be changed. You can’t worry about what you can’t control and if you worry about something you can control, then you should control it and change it.” Aria finished.

A long moment of silence passed. 

“I barely can get to sleep without thinking about what I could have done differently at Mount Weather.” Clarke confessed.

Aria turned to face Clarke and met her eyes. “Ok Clarke, tell me, what would you have done differently?” Aria asked Clark. 

Clarke took in a deep breath and sighed. “If Lexa hadn’t took the deal ...” Aria interrupted Clarke with a raised hand. 

“No Clarke, what would you have done differently? Lexa’s decisions were her own, that was not something you could control.” Clarke nodded and began again. 

“There are more people from the Ark than there were from the Mountain, if my people had donated the bone marrow, no one would have had to die, no one from the mountain, no one from my people, and your people wouldn’t had been used for their blood anymore.” Clarke told Aria.

Aria paused thinking. “Ok, say that they had accepted and that had happened. Then what?” Aria asked. 

Clarke tilted her head to the side, not sure how to answer it.

“Look Clarke, it might be easier to blame yourself than to forgive yourself. But the fact is, once the Mountain Men could breathe outside, there is no way they would stay in that mountain. We both know there was too much bad history between my people and theirs to live in peace. It may be harsh to say, but even their children would grow to hate us, as it is what they would have learned from their parents. They would likely still use the reapers, as a weapon against us and may even continue to steal my people to make them. It would have led to another war Clarke, one outside of the mountain, one that had hundreds of guns and missiles and other weapons at their disposal, to use against my people and probably yours. Maybe they would win against the 12 Clans or maybe some how they would lose. Either way thousands would have died.” Aria stared back at the fire.

Clarke was speechless, she had never really thought passed the bone marrow, or let herself to think past that solution. But Aria was right, the mountain men would not have lived in peace. They thought them as savages, animals even and probably would have seen Clarkes people as a threat. 

“You can’t live your life in regret Clarke, everything happens for a reason. You made your choice at the mountain, and I think we both know it was the right one and your only option. Forgive yourself Clarke and put the past behind you. You might think you deserve this pain but you don’t.”

Aria was right, Clarke had never seen it that way before, she needed to stop blaming herself and now she hoped she finally could. 

They put away the left-over stew and lay down on their role mats, ready to sleep for the night. Clarke could here Gilbert eating some grass, from the floor of a nearby tree where he was tied up. Clarke had finally been able to convince Aria to bring the horse out hunting with them. The harvest was long over, so the horses were no longer needed on the farm, and it made bringing their meat back a lot easier and quicker, and they could hunt further.

Clarke closed her eyes, listening to the sounds in the forest, when Aria spoke up. “Would you go back?”

Clarke knew she was talking about Camp Jaha, to her people. Clarke felt free out here, no weight of the world on her shoulders, no worry about the future, or what she needed to do next to survive. Here she was just a girl on a farm. 

She had often heard whispers about the mountain, about Wanheda, when Clarke went into the village. Mainly people wondered where she had gone, some people were starting to wonder whether she was even truly there, some say she was a spirit sent to defeat the mountain. Clarke always tried to listen out for news of her people, but she never heard any and hoped this meant that they were doing ok. 

Clarke had become well known to the people of the village. She had a lot more time, so when she delivered some of the medicinal herbs to the village healer, Helena. She took interest in her work and enjoyed learning some of the grounder’s methods, and tried to help out where she could. At times she went on visits with her to some smaller nearby villages that did not have any healers. Everyone she met was very kind and grateful for her help. 

It was hard for Clarke to imagine going back. She was scared that if she did, the agony she use to carry would return. So no, she didn’t intend on going back. But Clarke had too much heaviness for tonight, she wanted to lighten the mood. So, she decided to respond instead with. “Why? Are you trying to get rid of me?” Clarke said with a laugh. 

“Your family to me now Clarke. You will always have a home with us.”

Clarke smiled up at the stars covered in her furs as she slowly drifted off to sleep. 

‐-------------‐---------------------------------------

Clarke woke abruptly with a shake and Aria whispering her name quietly with warning. Aria was crouched with her spear in her hand, eyes locked on something in the bush. 

Clarke knew something was wrong and reached for her dagger, her bow and arrow being too far out of reach. 

Within seconds, a large black panther emerged from the trees. Clarke could hear Gilbert neighing and stomping, frightened behind her. 

Clarke and Aria now stood; all eyes locked on the Panther as it growled in front of them. 

A few moments passed and Clarke didn’t even dare to breathe. They knew they couldn’t turn and out run it. She debated about whether they could get to a nearby tree, but Clarke had no idea if it would be able to climb. 

Clarke didn’t have another second to think, as the panther lunged towards her. The creature didn’t even slow its advance, when she saw Aria’s spear land in one of its behind legs. Clarke suddenly felt a weight against her and she hit the ground with a thud. Her dagger landed to her side, and she waited for the pain to come. But it wasn’t the panther that hit her. It was Aria. Aria had pushed Clarke aside. 

Clarke scrambled to her feet and found her dagger. Clarke could hear the screams from Aria but Clarke couldn’t act fast enough. 

Clarke landed the dagger in the Panthers side and quickly pulled it back out so she wouldn’t be weapon less. The panther left its assault on Aria and turned to face Clarke once again. Clarke didn’t miss the blood that was now coating Aria and her lifeless body that lay behind the beast. But Clarke didn’t have time to think the worst right now. 

The Panther began its approach again, this time Clarke was ready, the anger that she felt for Aria fuelling her. She let out a growl herself and ran towards the Panther. As they collided, Clarke felt the pain of its paw against the back of her shoulder, but she also felt her dagger slice into the creature’s chest. It went heavy on top of her. 

She rolled the panther off, the dagger still firmly inside of it. And rushed over to Aria. Clarke fell to the ground beside her. She went straight to find her pulse. It was weak but it was there. Clarke couldn’t quite see where all the blood was coming from, but it seemed her worse wound was a bite to her stomach. Clarke went to her bag that was still on Gilbert saddle and got out what supplies she could. She didn’t know how badly the beast had mauled Aria, or how deep the wounds went. But she had to stop the bleeding and pray its teeth didn’t puncture anything. Clarke quickly padded the wounds she could see the best she could, but she knew it wouldn’t last long. 

She untied Gilbert and used every ounce of her strength to haul Aria carefully over the horse, in front of the saddle. Luckily with all her new training, she was a lot stronger than she once was and Aria was light. She left everything on the floor, but put her dagger back into its sheath against her thigh and jumped up into the saddle. She managed to pull Arias leg over and lift her up to rest against Clarkes front. Clarke held her with one arm and the reigns with the other. She heard Aria stir, and Clarke whispered in her ear, “Shhh try not to talk or move, you’re going to be ok, I promise you, you are going to be ok.” Clarke now felt tears falling over her cheeks. She had to be ok, Clarke couldn’t lose her. With that last thought, Clarke kicked the horse into a gallop. 

She knew if the injuries were internal and more serious that the village healer wouldn’t be able to do anything to save her. She knew the forest well now and headed in the only direction she could. For Clarke it was no longer a choice. She needed her mum. She needed her people.


	10. Chapter Ten – No Place like Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to say thank you again for everyone who is reading this, I am loving the feedback and it is giving me lots of motivation to keep writing!
> 
> Let me know as you keep reading, of any better names that you may think of other than, 'another story.' A couple of weeks ago when I started writing this I was unsure of what will happen (and still am) so I plan on changing it once it is complete. So I would love to hear your ideas! or of course if you think I should keep it the same.
> 
> I hope you enjoy the chapter!

Chapter Ten – No Place like Home

Clarke rode hard, not letting the horse ease even slightly. She felt for Gilbert, but she needed to save Aria. Clarke knew they were already hunting in the direction of camp and she would arrive a lot quicker back, than when she spent a couple of days wondering aimlessly in the woods. 

The sun was now getting higher in the sky, it had little heat but lightened the woods. Clarke soon approached the edge of the familiar clearing. One she didn’t plan on seeing for a long time. She began to slow slightly, worried they would shoot on sight thinking she was a grounder, just like with Anya. But before she could even get to a canter, she decided she has no time to waste, she could feel Arias’ shallow breaths against her and could feel her weakening. 

To Clarkes surprise, as Camp Jaha now came into view, not all of the Ark was behind the gates. What looked like wooden huts now surrounded the perimeter of the front half of the main camp, and stretched outwards towards Clarke as she entered the clearing. The main camp still held the electric fence around it, with armed guards, but the gates seemed wide open. 

As Clarke made her way towards the gates, she saw several people around the huts going in and out. They stopped and starred at Clarke as she bolted past, but Clarke couldn’t take in much, with her mind on the person she held tightly in front of her. 

She only slowed when she saw armed guards blocking her path at the gate. 

As she stopped in front of them, she shouted out desperately. “I need to see my mum, please she is hurt. I need Abby Griffin!”

The guards hesitated, exchanging an unsure glance at each other. Clarke was just about to let her fury out on these two idiots, when a voice reached her. “Let her pass.” It was Bellamy.

Clarke let out a deep sigh of relief and trotted forward to where he was fast approaching. 

“We were attacked by a panther, where’s my mum?” she asked Bellamy. 

Bellamy stepped forward, to help Clarke off the horse and swooped Aria up in his arms. Clarke had never been more grateful to Bellamy than she was right now. 

“She is in the med bay.” Bellamy said approaching the Ark doors, with Clarke quick at his side. He told one of the guards he passed to take care of the horse. Bellamy’s new guard jacket didn’t go unnoticed by Clarke, but in a way, this didn’t surprise her. Bellamy was good at protecting his people, Clarke thought the job suited him.

They entered the med bays’ sliding doors, and Bellamy put Aria down, just as Abby came out of her office. 

Abby froze at the sight of Clarke, tears already gathering in her eyes. But before she could say anything, she noticed Aria lay on the table. 

“Please mum, you have to save her!” Clarke begged meeting her mother’s gaze with pleading eyes, and tears starting to stream down her face.

Her mum went quickly to work, shouting at Bellamy to fetch Jackson, who appeared only moments later. 

Clarke watched for what seemed like a life time, but in reality, was only a few minutes. Then Bellamy gestured to the door. “Lets give them some space to work Clarke.” He said gently. Clarke knew she was in no state to help, she would just get in the way like this. But she took another couple of minutes, staring at Aria’s chest rising up and down, trying to take some sort of comfort in it. Then turned to step outside the med bay doors.

As she reached the other side of the doors, she let out a breath she didn’t know she was holding, and then slid down the opposite wall to the floor. With her back against the wall and her legs pulled tight up to her. Clarke let everything she had been holding in, out. Her body was shaking in sobs and she covered her face with her hands. She soon felt the stickiness that coated them, likely to have smeared blood all over her face. This only made her cry harder; she didn’t realise just how much she was covered in Aria’s blood until now. Her shoulder hurt, where the panther had cut it, as she leant against the cold wall. 

Clarke felt someone sit down next to her and put an arm around her. She twisted into him, burying her face into his neck and Bellamy held her. 

Clarke wasn’t sure how long she stayed like that, but eventually her tears dried and Bellamy had to leave for some guard duties. He apologised but promised to be back to check on her later. 

Time continued to pass and Clarke was now stood up pacing outside of the room. She could feel the now dry blood that was covering her hands and a lot of her clothing. But she couldn’t bring herself to leave to go wash them. 

Clarke heard the doors sliding open and turned instantly to face her mother, who was coming out. Clarke froze unsure of what her mother was going to say. 

“She is stable.” Abby told Clarke.

Clarke let her body relax and closed her eyes in relief, thanking some unknown person.

“She had lost a lot of blood, so we had to do a blood transfusion and she responded well. We have stitched up all of her wounds and she will have a few nasty scars, but with time and rest, she should make a full recovery.” Abby informed her.

“Thank you, mum, I thought I was going to lose her.” A few tears appearing in Clarkes eyes again at the memory. 

Abby stepped forward and took Clarke into a hug. “I am so glad you are safe Clarke!” Abby told Clarke as she held her, now spilling some tears of her own. 

“I’m so sorry mum, but I had to leave, I couldn't stay here not after...” 

“Shhh, I know Clarke, don’t worry I know.” Abby said, comforting Clarke, still holding her in a tight embrace. 

After a few moments, Clarke pulled slightly away, “can I see her.” She asked.

“Of course.” Abby replied, gesturing for Clarke to go inside.

As Clarke stepped inside, she could see Jackson by Aria’s side, looking to be taking her vitals. Clarke’s eyes automatically gazed over her body, checking for any signs that there could be something wrong. Aria lay on top of a bed, just in her under wrap and her grounder undershorts. There was a lot more closed cuts than Clarke imagined. Her face seemed untouched but for the rest of her boy, it didn’t seem there was an arm or a leg without at least one scratch or bite. 

Clarke went over to Aria and put her hand over hers, rubbing her thumb over the back of Arias’. 

“Clarke, your bleeding!” Abby said, moving to act. 

“It’s ok, it’s just a scratch.” Clarke tried to reassure.

“Clarke please let me take a look.” Abby insisted.

Clarke began to take her jacket off and headed for the stool that her mother was pointing to. She lifted off her top and stiffened at the sting of her mums’ touch on the back of her shoulder. As Abby was cleaning the wound, she asked; “Where did you go?” 

Clarke wasn't sure what to tell her, she felt guilty for the happiness she has felt for the past few months, whilst her mum was here, probably imagining the worst. Clarke opted for the truth. “A village. I came across Aria in the woods. Her and her family took me in.” Clarke told her.

Abby never responded. Clarke could feel a slight injection that numbed her shoulder and then assumed her mum had begun stitching. 

When Abby had finished, by putting a dressing over the wound. Clarke slipped her clothes back on.

Abby rounded Clarke, now facing her. 

“I gave her some general anaesthesia, so she will be out for a few more hours.” Abby informed her. “There is a lot that we need to catch up on Clarke. A lot has happened since you have been gone.” 

Clarke could tell there was something wrong, but just when she was about to ask. Her mum continued. “But for now, you need to rest and clean up. Your change of clothes are still where you left them.” Abby told her. “We have plenty of time to catch up later.” 

Clarke felt unsure, her mother was clearly concerned about something. But when she saw her mother’s warm, reassuring smile. Clarke realised just how much she had missed her and stood up, giving her another hug. Clarke decided that if it was urgent, her mother would have told her. “OK,” Clarke accepted. “But promise me you will let me know if there is any change.”

Clarke stepped back, taking one more look at Aria.

“I promise Clarke.”

Clarke left the med bay heading down the familiar halls, in the direction of her room.


	11. Chapter Eleven

Chapter Eleven 

Walking through the ark didn’t feel the same to Clarke. It was her home for her whole life, but now she feels like a stranger. She was beginning to feel a little trapped, so she took a detour from the direction of her room, to get some fresh air. 

As she stepped out from the Ark doors, she soon felt the cool winters air greet her. Aria said it didn’t often snow until the end of winter, sometimes not at all and although Clarke knew the snow could be dangerous if you weren’t prepared for it, she secretly hoped it would. She couldn’t think of anything more magical; she saw old pictures and movies on the ark with snow in them, and she always thought she had never seen anything more beautiful. The books she read always made it sound so much fun, having something called a snow ball fight or sliding down hills. 

Just as Clarke was lost in imagination, someone calling her name, pulled her out. “Jeeze Clarke, forgot your name whilst you have been gone?” Raven said laughing as she made her way towards Clarke, her leg visibly causing her some pain. 

Clarke smiles “well some people did call me Clary,” she told Raven as she went to hug her. But before she could, Raven nearly jumped back. Clarke instantly thought maybe Raven hadn’t forgiven her after Finn, but Raven had told Clarke she understood Finn would had suffered far worse and that there was no other way. 

Clarke took a step back not wanting to offend Raven and went to apologise, but raven spoke up first. “I’m sorry Clarke, as much as I have missed you, there is noooo way I’m hugging you whilst you look like that.” Raven told Clarke with a scrunched-up face and a laugh at the end. Clarke felt the relief instantly wash over her and pretended to look offended by Ravens comment. But she couldn’t blame Raven, she wouldn’t hug herself either. So, she also let out a laugh. She had missed Raven and was glad to see her looking happy. 

Clarke glanced past Raven from where she stood in front of her and said, “A lot has changed since I have been gone.” It wasn’t a question; it was a statement. Raven went to Clarkes side and also stood facing, out past the Ark gates, where the new huts were. 

“We started building the dwellings about a month after you had left. Once things died down after the mountain, we soon realised that this was well... it, our home. So, Marcus recommended that we should start making it into one.” Raven told Clarke, both still looking out, watching the people come and go, getting on with their days work. Clarke could see another hut being built to the right, but this one looked bigger.

“I am surprised you built them so fast.” Clarke replied.

“The grounders helped.” Raven revealed. Clarke was a little taken back by this, she hadn’t really thought much about what would have happened between her people and the grounders, but she assumed it wouldn’t be this, not after the grounders betrayed them. Raven could see Clarkes confusion and began to tell her more, “Marcus convinced everyone it would be within our people’s best interest to keep a good relationship with the grounders. He was worried there wouldn’t be peace. So, a few days after the mountain, he went to Ton DC with a few others to talk to the commander.” The mention of the Commander made Clarkes heart sink a little, just like it always did. “She granted us this land and some surrounding areas and assured there would be peace. Marcus and Indra practically became best buds and Marcus offered our help in rebuilding Ton Dc.” The mention of Ton DC made a sick feeling in the pit of Clarkes stomach. “After, in return, they helped us build these huts, and showed us some other things like how to hunt. I am sure as hell thankful for the furs I got out of that one, who knew the ground could be so cold.” Raven said, wrapping her usual red coat a little tighter around her at the thought. 

Clarke took a moment to take everything in. She was glad there was peace between her people and the grounders and that the Ark was finally making a home here. But a small part of her couldn’t help but feel a little upset by it. Surely her people couldn’t just forgive and forget the betrayal just like that so quickly. Clarke knew how she was feeling was petty and she guessed it was a good thing she had left. She didn’t know if she could have been so forgiving, so soon. Clarke knew for sure; she would have wanted to throw Lexas help right back in her face and would have been too proud to accept. 

With this thought Clarke asked, “surely our people couldn’t have been so forgiving after the betrayal of the mountain?” Clarke met Ravens eyes.

“I hate the commander as much as the next person here, but it doesn’t change the fact that she is still, well that, the Commander. If we are going to survive down here, I sure as one would rather stay on her good side... not that she has a bad side.” Raven added with a grin and wink, and turned back to watch some kids chasing each other around. Clarke felt a bit of jealousy at Ravens words, but soon shook the feeling. “Your mum took some convincing though, I think she blames Lexa for you leaving. I wouldn’t leave those two alone in a room that’s for sure.” Raven said with a light hearted laugh. 

“I am glad everything is going good here.” Clarke said with a genuine smile to Raven. Clarke didn’t fail to see Raven’s face slightly drop at her words. She was about to ask about it, when Sinclair called Raven over, from where he stood next to some type of automobile. 

Raven apologised and said she would see her at dinner and headed over to Sinclair. 

Clarke decided to head inside and finally went to wash up, at least then hopefully people would stop staring. Although she knew they weren’t just staring because of the blood. 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The warm shower felt amazing, that was definitely one thing Clarke missed about the Ark. She pulled on some of her old, black, tight fitted trousers and a green tank top. Then wiped down her jacket and boots, so she could still wear them. Her jacket had been her favourite thing she found to wear at Aria’s. It looked just like a regular black leather jacket, that stopped just at her hips, but the feeling of the fur inside, when she slides it on, is Clarkes favourite part and it fits her perfectly. She left her hair all down, still dripping wet after she had brushed it and headed back in the direction of the med bay.

When Clarke passed the Ark doors. She stopped to glance outside. It was growing dark now and to her surprise the gates were closed and it didn’t look like anyone was outside of them in the huts. But found it odd that people still wander inside the gate as normal. 

Clarke continued on to the med bay. She went straight in through the sliding doors. Clarke could see her mum talking too Marcus in her office.

Aria looked comfy with her head sunken in to a pillow and a sheet pulled up to keep her warm. Clarke lay down the spare clothes she brought for Aria, on an unused bed to Aria’s right and then sat down in the chair next to Aria. 

Not long after, her mum and Marcus came out of the office and drew her attention. Clarke greeted Marcus but didn’t move from her chair. She noticed the Chancellor pin Marcus now wore on his jacket. “I am glad you are home safe Clarke,” he said with his usual smile. “I will give you and your mum some time to catch up.” He didn’t give Clarke a chance to respond before he was gone out of the room. 

Abby sat on the stool not too far from Clarke. “So, Marcus is the chancellor now?” Clarke asked.

“We had a vote, a couple of others ran, but Marcus won by an over whelming number in the end. He deserves it, he is who we need on the ground.” Abby said, with a smile, sounding proud of him.

“But you didn’t run?” Clarke asked, feeling like she still didn’t get the answer she was looking for. 

“No, it took some time for me to recover from my injuries in the mountain, and I was too distracted with things, with you being gone and doing my job as a Doctor. I thought it was best, so that my focus wasn’t split.” Abby explained.

Clarke nodded at this, feeling slightly guilty for her part in it.

“I noticed no one is outside of the fence?” Clarke asked changing the subject.

Her mum seemed uneasy at her words, clearly debating how to answer. 

“The gates stayed open for some time, never closing and most of the Ark people soon preferred the huts. They are a lot bigger than the rooms in here, and people didn’t have to share.” Abby said staring down at her hands in her lap, now raising her eyes to meet Clarkes. “But now it is unsafe to be out after dark.”

Abby let her words linger as they sunk into Clarke. Clarke was confused, she thought everything was going great here with the grounders. “But I thought Marcus had negotiated peace with the grounders?” Clarke asked, looking confused. 

“It’s not Trikru, Clarke. It’s Azgeda.” Her mum informed Clarke. 

“The Ice Nation? Why are they a threat? Does it have something to do with the bounty on my head?” Clarke asked worried it was her fault. 

“It started about a month ago. One of our patrols, locked on to one of the Ark stations beacons.” Clarkes eyes went wide. 

“Which station?” Clarke asked, she knew it was a possibility that others had survived, especially since Mount Weather was jamming the signal, stopping them from communicating with any others. 

“Farm station.” Her mum answered. 

“Did they find them? Were there any survivors?” Clarke asked hopefully.

Her mum paused again and then eventually continued. “They had landed in Azgeda Clarke.” 

Clarke’s heart sank. 

“Did any survive?” Clarke asked, her voice now full of sadness.

“Only Eleven. The patrol came across the small group of survivors, who had been managing to stay alive in the Northern Mountains. They believe that more may still be alive, kept as prisoner on Farm station.”

“We have to do something,” Clarke said standing up. Clarke could already feel her mind begin to race.

“We don’t even know if they are alive Clarke... and there is more.” Clarke sat back down slowly at her mother’s words. 

“Three weeks ago, a hunting party didn’t come back. Bellamy and Octavia went out with a couple of guards to look for them. They found them on the edge of the Trikru and Ice Nation boarder... with their heads on spikes.” Abby’s voice starting to break at the tragedy. 

Clarke could feel her heart beginning to race even faster, worry for her people washing over her and a thousand questions forming in her mind. 

“Five days ago, another hunting party was attacked. One died in the attack but the others made it back with only minor injuries. Luckily, we had sent them out with their guns this time, in preparation in case there was another attack.” 

“Have you spoken to the commander about this?” Clarke asked instantly.

“Indra has confirmed by the description from the survivors and the way they attacked that it was the Ice Nation, but she said there was nothing that could be done. Ice Nation are the ones who are a part of the twelve Clans and that they are not breaking any of the rules, as they are not attacking any of the other Clans.”

“You can’t be serious!” Clarke said rising from her chair in anger. “She is just going to let our people die again!” Abby also now stood. 

“After the first attack, Marcus convinced Indra to go to Polis to talk to the Commander, but she just said that her hands are tied.” Abby told Clarke, visibly seeing Clarke getting angrier at her words so she added. “But she has agreed for Indra to provide us with as much food as we need, as we have stopped being able to hunt. Which is a huge help, as we all know how much morale drops, when we are living off the food we can only grow in here.” Abby said grateful.

“But I don’t understand, why are the Ice Nation even targeting us?” Clarke asked still puzzled. Surely, they should be grateful to us for defeating the mountain.

“Indra said what happened at the mountain changed things, that what you did weakened the commander.” Her mum hesitated on the next part. “If the Ice Queen gets your power and her people believed she has it. She will break the coalition to start a war. She thinks the Ice queen see’s us as a threat, that we have the weapons used by the mountain on our side. That we should be eliminated as well as you, so that she won’t be fighting wars on both fronts.

“If Lexa knows this then why isn’t she doing something about it. We could fight the Ice Nation together.” Clarke suggested.

“We offered that Clarke, but Indra says some Clans side with the Ice Nation in thinking we are a threat and until the Ice queen does something to break the coalition, Lexa can’t justify it and won’t do anything that would cause a divide between the Clans.”

“What so she is just going to let the Ice Nation wipe us out, before they turn against her and then she will be bothered to do something.” Clarke said panicked at the thought.

“Clarke, I was just talking with Marcus and as much as it pains me, because I have only just got you back, we think we might stand a chance at getting the Commander to help us, if you speak with her.” Abby suggested as a possibility.

Clarke was taken back by this, that is the last thing she wants. “I think Marcus would have a better chance than me.” Clarke replied. “From what I hear, he is the one that created the peace between you and the grounders.”

“No Clarke, Marcus has been incredible at building relations between us and the grounders since you left, but you got us that peace Clarke, Lexa was simply just honouring what she had already promised you. You are the one that got Lexa to agree to an alliance in the first place.” Abby encouraged.

Clarke thought about her mother’s words. But she just couldn’t see what she could do. It was clear Lexa didn’t care about her, when she walked away from her at Mount Weather. If anything, it sounded like she was now a threat to Lexa and a part of Clarke just wanted to be selfish and hide away again with a book in her room at the farm. But she already knew that was no longer a choice, she couldn’t leave knowing her people weren’t safe. Otherwise everything she had done up to this point would be in vain. 

Abby’s voice brought Clarke out of her thoughts, “Lexa respected you Clarke, if anyone can do this it’s you.”

Clarke began to shake her head. “I’m sorry mum but I can’t, Lexa wouldn’t listen to me, it was clear she has no regard for me when she betrayed me at the mountain. Lexa could care less about me or what I have to say.” Clarke said in defeat, feeling helpless. 

“She does care Clarke.” Both Clarke and Abby’s eyes darted over to Aria, as she spoke in a raspy, slow voice, her eyes fluttering open from where she lay in her bed. Aria slightly started to cough and Abby acted quickly, to go give her some water. She took a few sips and looked back up at Clarke. Clarke wanted to go to her, ask her how she was feeling, but the confusion and the feeling of dread that was slowly rising in her, kept her firmly in place.

They held each other’s stare for a few moments, Clarke could see Aria didn’t want to continue, but eventually she revealed; “she wouldn’t have sent me to look after you, if she didn’t care, Clarke.”


	12. Chapter Twelve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A huge thanks to everyone who is still reading! I am loving the feedback, so please keep letting me know your thoughts! I think I managed 10 chapters in two weeks, however I started back at work on Tuesday (I work in a school) so please bare with me, more chapters will come! I will be posting at least one a week, but once I get back into the swing of work, hopefully I will be able to do a few more.
> 
> Thanks again!

Chapter 12 

Clarke felt a pain wash through her. Her legs nearly buckling under her at Arias words. 

Clarke was shaking her head from side to side, looking distraught as she managed to say, “no, no! That’s not possible, I found you in the woods that day.” Clarke sounded desperate; she could feel everything she thought she knew beginning to crumble. She didn’t think she could handle another betrayal, especially not from Aria, she was her person, her family, the one person she thought she could trust. It can't all be a lie.

Aria looked guilty, but never looked away from Clarke, it was clear it was time for Clarke to learn the truth. “That’s what I wanted you to believe” Aria confessed. 

A few moments of silence passed.

“I am so sorry Clarke; I should have told you a long time ago, but I was worried how you would react. It doesn’t change anything between us, it doesn’t change the past four months. I am still me.” Aria begged; a tear now visible in her eyes as she struggled to lean up. But before Aria could continue, Clarke was running out of the room. 

Clarke rushed out of the Ark; she stopped a few feet outside of the Arks’ entrance. Her hands were now on her knees, hunched over trying to catch her breath. This couldn't be happening she thought, she felt like such a fool. 

It was a clear night, with the moon and the stars lighting up what they could. There were many guards on duty near the fence, but people were still out and about within the gates. Some people sat around small fires, some at tables, chatting, eating and drinking. Clarke realised she hadn’t eaten all day, but right now she didn't seem to feel very hungry, but she sure could use a drink. As the thought crossed her mind, she noticed Raven sat around a table with Monty and Jasper. Clarke could use a distraction, but Clarke was nervous of how Jasper would be, he wouldn’t even look at her on the way back from Mount Weather. 

Just as she built up the courage and pulled her self together, standing up straight, ready to take a step in their direction, she felt her mother’s presence stand beside her. 

“How is she?” Clarke asked, still concerned about Arias’ health, regardless of the revelation.

“She's strong, I had to nearly wrestle her to stop her from getting up to come after you.” Clarkes face managed to break into a small smirk at the thought of her mum trying to fight Aria.

“You would lose,” Clarke said simply.

“I don’t doubt it,” her mum responded. “I managed to convince her to give you some time. She is eating now; Jackson is watching over her.” They both stood for a moment watching over where their people laughed and chatted. 

Abby turned to face Clarke. “Clarke, I never truly told you the story of how your father and I met. We started dating at 16, as I know you have heard many times before. But what you don’t know is that your father’s friends dared him. I was a bit of an outsider, with not many friends. It wasn’t until six months into the relationship that I found out the truth from one of his friends. He was so scared that I would think everything was a lie, so he never told. He told me it became real for him two minutes into the date; it took me a while, but I eventually forgave him. Just because something started from a lie, doesn’t make it any less real.” Abby told Clarke. “I know it’s not the same but ...”

It suddenly dawned on Clarke what Abby was getting at. “Mum, me and Aria, we aren’t together, I love her, she’s like family to me, but it’s not how you think.” Clarke couldn’t help but let out a laugh at the thought. 

“Oh,” her mother said, a little embarrassed now. Abby coughed awkwardly, “but still, my story stands, even as friends Clarke. Get some rest for the night, I am going to give Aria more pain killers to help her sleep and then you should try talking to her again in the morning.” Abby gave Clarkes arm a squeeze and a smile. Then headed back inside. 

Clarke thought about what her mother had said, she knew there was truth to what she was saying. Aria was just following orders and deep-down Clarke knew the friendship they had created was real, but Clarke couldn’t think about that right now. So, she headed over to the empty place next to Raven.

Just before Clarke could reach the table, Jasper quickly stood up from where her was sat opposite Raven and intercepted her. Clarkes heart began to race, nervous to what Jasper was going to say, she wasn’t sure she could take any more upset tonight, or drama after today. 

“Hey Clarke, erm well,” Jasper mumbled, scratching the back of his neck, looking anywhere but Clarke. “I just wanted to say I am sorry about the things I said when we were leaving the mountain. When I lost Maya, well erm I wasn’t myself. I guess I wasn’t myself for a while. I thought I could have stopped Cage but...” Jasper hesitated again. “Yeah anyways, I get you guys did what you had to, I would had lost a lot more people I cared about if you hadn’t done what you did.” Jasper looked up at Clarke, a tear in his eye matching Clarkes, as it brought them both back memories of that day. 

Clarke went to open her mouth as her tears weld up even more at the unexpected kindness Jasper was giving her, but nothing came out. Jasper gave her an understanding smile and reached out to hug her. Tears now fell from Clarke onto Jasper as he did the same. Jasper pulled back and sniffed wiping his nose. It was still too hard for him to think of Maya without getting upset, so he soon tried to distract his mind with something else. “Come on Clarke we’re playing cards, it’s a great drinking game. If you lose you drink and if you win you drink.” Jasper said, swinging one arm around Clarke leading her to the table. Clarke couldn’t help but laugh at that. She didn’t realise the joy she could feel seeing Jasper back to the boy she knew when they landed. 

“Hey guys, check it out, the lonely wanderer has returned.” Jasper announced. Clarke heard a few cheers and a few ‘whoop whoops,’ she clearly had some catching up to do!

Just as Clarke slid in next to Raven, Miller, a guy Clarke didn’t recognise, Monroe and Harper stood from their table and pulled it so it was connected to Clarkes. This now left Clarke in the middle, with Raven on one side and Monroe and Harper the other and across from Monty, Jasper, Miller and the new guy. 

“I am glad you are safe Clarke,” Monty said gently to Clarke. 

“Thank you”. Clarke said smiling back at her old friend. 

“Yeah glad you didn’t die Clarke.” Miller said with this usual grin. “This is my boyfriend Brian.” Miller gestured to the guy who was sat next to him. 

It took Clarke a minute to piece it together, “Nice to meet you Brian, farm station I’m guessing.” This instantly changed the mood and wiped the smile of everyone’s faces. 

“Yeah me, Monty’s mum and a few others made it out.” Millers boyfriend told her. 

Clarke wanted to know more, but she didn’t want to put a downer on a rare moment of just having simple drinks with a few friends. So instead Clarke gave a small smile directed at Monty, to express she was pleased he found his mum and he gave her a thankful smile back. The silence continued a couple minutes more, but luckily Raven was Raven.

“So, Clarke who’s the super-hot grounder chick, Bellamy is gushing about saving and who I saw when I visited Abby earlier.” Raven said sliding a drink and a plate of food towards Clarke with a sly grin on her face. And just like that the mood was lifted. 

Clarke managed to enjoy this rare moment with her friends and for the first time since returning, she was glad she was back. She filled them all in on what she had been up to and they told her what she had missed, she was shocked how easy it was to just fall back in with her friends like she had never left. 

\--------

People soon began to turn in for the night and Clarke soon found herself drunkenly stumbling into the arks make shift stables. Bellamy had joined the group after his guard shift and mentioned to Clarke where Gilbert was. 

“who the fuck does she think she is sending someone to watch me. If she wanted to make sure I was safe she shouldn’t have left me.” Clarke was telling gilbert a little too loudly. Just as Clarke was about to continue her rant, whilst she stroked Gilberts nose, she noticed a shadow appear in the doorway. 

“Pissed that the commander left you to die huh? Now you know how it feels when you left me to die in Ton DC.” Octavia said with her arms folded leaning against the frame of the door. 

With the alcohol clouding Clarkes mind, it took her moment to realise what Octavia had said. “That was different,” Clarke slurred. 

“How? Because it was you and your more important? Or that the 250 people that died in Ton DC, were less important than the 50 of our people in the mountain. You really think if Lexa could sacrifice 250 of her own people that she wouldn’t hesitate to sacrifice 50 of yours to win the war?” Octavia counted.

Clarke couldn’t think clearly or think of what to say to defend herself so she blurted out with some tears growing; “I was trying to save our people!” Clarke said stepping away from Gilbert, starting to get annoyed.

“So was the commander!” Octavia defended, unfolding her arms and taking a couple steps towards Clarke.

“Your defending her now?!”

“Indra has made me understand that battles are lost to win a war Clarke, sacrifices have to be made and as a warrior you have to be willing to die for what you are fighting for.” Octavia said calmly, passing Clarke and refilling Gilberts water, along with three other horses that were here. 

“But your still angry with me?” Clarke asked a little calmer, but with hurt behind her words. 

Octavia stopped in her tracks holding an empty bucket and closed her eyes and took a deep sigh. “No Clarke, I am not. Hate never brought anyone any happiness. What’s done is done and I know you are a good person, from the moment we landed you did everything you could for everyone else. So, you should do yourself a favour and let this anger go, you will be happier for it.” Then continued to finished what she was doing.

Clarke stood for a few moments contemplating what Octavia had just said, she was flooded with relief that Octavia had forgiven her and wished she was capable of doing the same. But how she felt about Lexa, made the betrayal different, it hurt her deeper.

“I can’t,” Clarke confessed a few tears growing in her eyes again now.

Octavia gave a nod in Clarkes direction and headed back out, but before she was out of sight, she hesitated and said without looking back at Clarke, “It is good you are back Clarke; our people are going to need you.” With that Octavia was gone and Clarke took a few more sips of the drink she had brought with her.


	13. Chapter Thirteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am super sorry for not posting. Work has been crazy with covid 19 and the second lockdown here in England (schools stayed open so didn't have anytime off). I wil try post some more chapters over the next couple weeks. I have a few ready to go and I hope you guys like them!

Chapter 13  
An awful smell that made its way up Clarkes nose quickly awoke Clarke. She sat up quick, taking in her surroundings, she relaxed when she recalled where she was and what had happened with Aria. Clarke was no longer in the woods, but instead she was lay on a pile of straw in Gilberts stable. Clarke groaned and fell back into the comfy, yet itchy bed she had slept on. 

Clarke stared up at the wooden make shift roof and for a moment pretended that she was back in the barn on the farm, playing in the hay with Noah. A smile quickly grew on her face, which soon turned into a laugh, laughing at herself for thinking it was a good idea to sleep here.

It was barely light and Clarke soon realised it would be best to make it back to her room before people were out and about to see her. After a few moments, Clarke managed to haul herself up and slowly headed back to her room, hoping the sickness she was feeling, wouldn’t present itself. 

She slipped back into her room and collapsed on her bed. 

Clarke tried to get back to sleep but her mind was racing, going over everything that had happened since she woke up yesterday, she couldn’t believe how fast things had changed, then again, she knew better than to not expect the unexpected on the ground. But she had gotten so comfortable in her life with Aria and her family, she felt safe, happy even. Then that awful feeling grew again in the pit of her stomach. ‘lies’ she thought, none of it was real, so was she really ever happy? She felt like her feeling of content from the past few months, those few moments of joy, all of her memories had been taken away from her.

With the awful feeling growing as she lay thinking, so did her anger. Clarke sat up, a little too quick that sent her a little woozy, but then continued to get up and head straight for her door, nearly running to the med bay.

The sliding doors couldn’t open fast enough. Clarke had heard her mother’s words the night before, but it didn’t change how Clarke felt. Clarke was so desperate to ease this new feeling of betrayal, as much as Clarke thought about Lexa every day, and the pain didn’t get any less, she learnt to live with it. She didn’t want to have to live with this as well and she knew Aria was the only person that could change how she felt. 

Clarke slowed in her strides when she saw Aria. She looked too peaceful and so small, where she lay asleep in her bed. Clarke felt a pinch of guilt wash over her, she felt guilty for feeling so angry, but most of all for storming out yesterday before she could properly check Aria was ok. She felt guilty for drinking and laughing, while Aria lay here probably wondering where the hell she was, far from her family or anyone she knew. 

Clarke stood frozen, mouth slightly open at the foot of Aria’s bed, unsure of what she should do. Whether she should wake her. A few moments past and Aria’s eyes slowly flickered open and met Clarkes gaze, she didn’t say anything, but also didn’t look away. Clarke could see the sorrow and guilt in Aria’s eyes, but most of all she could see desperation, a silent beg loomed between them.   
Standing, looking at Aria, a calm settled over Clarke the feeling in her stomach left and Clarke could finally put her mind to rest. Since last night deep down Clarke knew this didn’t change anything between them, she was just scared Aria was going to tell her, she didn’t care, that it was all pretend, that she was just following orders and that Clarke meant nothing to her. But looking into Aria’s eyes now and the silent exchange between them. Clarke knew without a doubt the friendship they have created between them was real. Clarke let out a deep sigh of relief, the past few months were no longer being stolen from her. But it still doesn’t change Clarkes anger, Aria could have told her the truth and been honest, anytime in the past few months. Clarke was going to need some time to forgive that and to rebuild there trust. 

Just when Clarke was opening her mouth to speak. Abby walked in with a clipboard in hand. She stopped when she saw Clarke in the room, and slowly looked back and forth between the two, trying to read the situation. 

“Morning Clarke,” her mother opted for. “errr... looks.. umm... like you had an interesting night.” Her mother said, with one eyebrow raised, and her eyes roaming over Clarke and landing in her hair. She stepped towards Clarke and pulled a piece of straw out of her messy hair. Clarke couldn’t help but smile. 

“Erm. Yeah, something like that”, Clarke said slightly embarrassed, trying to run her fingers through her hair. Clarke glanced at Aria, who of course was smirking, ‘some things never change Clarke thought.’ 

“How’s Gilbert?” Aria asked, with a knowing look. 

“Who’s Gilbert?” Abby said intrugued. 

“He’s our horse, and yes he is good, being fed and well looked after.” Clarke said sending dagger’s Aria’s way. This only made Aria chuckle. Clarke knew she still hadn’t forgiven Aria for not telling her, but she couldn’t help but be naturally pulled into their usual dynamic, it was hard for Clarke to not just fall back into how they always were, being around her. 

Following that thought, Clarke quickly shook of the moment they were having and turned to face her mum, with her back mostly towards Aria. “How is she doing?” She asked her mum, as if Aria was not in the room. She knew she was being petty, but she wasn’t ready to let go of her anger just yet, and being around Aria didn’t make it easy. But she still needed to know she was ok. 

“Really well,” her mother began to answer and she walked over to check over Aria. “her stitches have held nicely and there are no signs of infection. She lost a lot of blood, so she will be tired for a few days and will need lots of rest and fluids.” Abby turned to continue to say the rest to Aria. “You will be able to try walking and more movements in a couple of days, but you need to stay in bed and try to be still, so you do not tear any of your stitches open. If you do, the healing process will just start over again and will take even longer. A few of the minor stitches I did will dissolve on their own, the others I will have to be taken out over the next couples of weeks as they heal.”

The last part made Aria eyes bolt open and sit up uncomfortably. “Weeks, I am so sorry, I really appreciate you saving my life, but there is no way I can stay here for that long!” Aria said desperate, looking between Clarke and Abby, but neither said anything, so Aria continued to fight her point. “I can barely stay in my house for a night, and no offense but at least my house is better decorated... than erm well this.” Aria said gesturing around the room. “My family are probably worried sick.” Aria tried. Abby looked to Clarke then back at Aria. 

“A few of Trikru, will be here tomorrow to trade, I will get you something to write with and they will have a rider sent to your family to explain what has happened.” Abby assured Aria. “As for when you can leave, how about we just take it one day at a time?” Abby said now rubbing her thumb over her upper arm to help calm her. 

Aria just simply nodded and Abby turned back to face Clarke. “Clarke honey, I would really like to redress you wound and check it is not infected.” Clarke didn’t answer but went to sit on the stool again, so her mother could do what she needed. The room was awkwardly silent as Abby worked on Clarke, and Clarke knew she needed to get out of their as soon as she could. She still hadn’t looked Aria in the eye since she turned away. She felt bad, she knew they still needed to talk, but with the dread that was at the pit of Clarkes stomach now eased slightly, she thought it was best to give a little more time so she could talk to Aria calmly. She knew Aria needed her, but she also knew Aria was strong and has fought in many battles and she was sure she would survive resting in bed for a few days. But still, Clarke thought it would be best to ask Raven if she didn’t mind stopping in and checking on Aria. 

As Clarke headed out of the med bay to go take a much needed shower and find some breakfast. Her mother called out and stopped her in the corridor, “Clarke, I didn’t want to bring this back up just yet, I know you have a lot going on, but we have a council meeting at noon today, about what our next move and options are in defending the camp, it would be really great if you could join us.” 

“I’m sorry mum but I left, it seems like you have it handled, I am sure the council will come up with something.” Clarke said and then quickly began to walk away. 

But her mum stopped her again. “That is part of the problem Clarke, they have already come up with something.”

Clarke looked at her mum puzzled. “Clarke not many of us survived the Ark, but we have amazing minds down here, better minds than 100 years ago when they built the weapons that destroyed the earth.”

Clarke wrinkled her eyebrows in confusion, still unsure where her mother was going with this. 

Her mother sighed realising she was going to have to say it. “If we can’t convince them of a better or at least another option at the meeting today, they will start what they have named operation Apollo. They will create weapons that will wipe out thousands Clarke. Our people deserve better than another war, our people already have so much blood on our hands that if we have a chance at peace, we should take it. It might be the harder option; I know how you must be feeling towards Lexa.” 

Clarke thought ‘no you don't’ inwardly to herself.

“But its the right thing to do Clarke. Our people were finally feeling safe, like they had a home on the ground, it was becoming as they hoped as children, when they would look out to the earth from the Ark imagining what living there again would be like.” Her mum took a deep breath and tried one last time.

“Please Clarke we need you.” 

“OK" Clarke said simply. She wasn’t sure herself if she meant it, but she couldn’t say no to her mum right now, not when she looked so hopeful. Clarke had turned her back on her people the last few months, she wouldn't do it again, not knowing they were in danger. Telling herself they were all ok without her, was one thing, but that wouldn’t work anymore, not now she knew the truth. She had to save her people.


	14. Chapter Fourteen

Chapter 14

Clarke stopped outside the heavy metal door, she felt freshly showered and had a full stomach. Clarke could pretend all she liked that she could just walk away. She knew it wasn’t an option for her, even though she tried not to think about what was happening. Her people needed her and she wouldn’t leave until she knew they were safe. The weight of the mountain no longer weighed heavily on Clarke, and seeing her friends no longer reminded her of what she did. But she still couldn’t picture staying in this metal box again, not after she had experienced what living on the ground was really like. Maybe she could build one of the new huts for herself a little further away once things were safe. Clarke soon shook the thought, she shouldn’t let herself dream of those moments, those where she no longer just had to survive, but where she could properly live, it seemed as though fate was not on her side.

Clarke took a deep breath and muttered to herself, “here we go again” as she pressed the button to open the door. 

Inside 9 people were already sat around an oval table in the centre of the room, Clarke knew she was late, very late actually, but it took a while to convince herself to come, something about the council, always put Clarke on edge, she was never sure why but it probably had something to do with the council that sentenced her to solitude. Clarke pushed down the thought and smiled as she entered. 

“Clarke welcome” Marcus greeted, gesturing to a seat between himself and her mother. 

Clarke simply nodded and skirted over to the empty chair seat. 

As she sat Marcus seemed to continue what he was saying before Clarke entered. “If we move to the mountain for protection, we would never have the freedom of daylight again and we may as well have stayed in the sky.” Marcus explained. “Not to mention councillor Graham, it is likely what the Ice Nation are expecting and would likely attack us on our route.” A skinny man, with a big bushy moustache and grey hair, scratched his head and hummed in agreement.

“Then what is your recommendation chancellor. “A red headed woman asked Marcus.

Marcus rose to his feet and pointed his arm out into Clarkes direction. “Clarke is the key, our secret weapon. The commander is the only one who can stop this and bring peace to the ground, she listened to Clarke before when she didn’t even know her, she will listen to Clarke again.” 

There was a moment of silence when Kane finished, but soon after the mutters grew louder, many shaking their heads. “So, you expect us to leave our fate in the hands of an 18-year-old girl,” the man with the moustache stated.

Clarke didn’t know if she should speak, she had no idea what she would even say, defend herself, agree with the man it probably wouldn’t work and they should come up with something else? But before Clarke could decide. A woman Clarke recognised as Harpers Grandmother spoke up, loud above the other voices that were agreeing with this Councillor Graham. “As we have done before,” the elderly lady voiced clearly and with respect, leaving everyone silent. “Andy, farm station was not here for our first few months on the ground, but we all know you have heard the stories. Clarke is the reason we are alive today. I believe in the song.” 

Everyone stayed silent but Clarke couldn’t help but ask, “the song?”

“The song that many have begun to sing, the tale of your legacy and prayer for the future.”

Clarke still didn’t understand, she looked confused towards the elderly woman.

Harpers Grandmother, cleared her throat and straightened a little more.

“We flew through the stars,  
We flew through the sky,  
We landed safely, in the blink of an eye,  
The commander came in the darkness of night,  
We could either run or we could stand and fight,  
Our children were lost, our hope was gone,  
but soon came Clarke, our very own phenomenon,  
She stood alone between heaven and hell,   
She would never give up even if she fell,  
She gave us our life,  
But left us alone in her strife.”

She paused for a moment and glanced around the room at the council, looking a little uncomfortable before she continued.

“We should say goodbye,   
to the leaders we no longer need from the sky,  
We wait and pray,   
Knowing that someday,  
Our true leader will return,  
When she is ready to accept that it is her turn.”

Clarke was speechless, and it seemed as though everyone else was too, when Clarke looked up at the others, it was clear it was not their first-time hearing this, most sat awkwardly, trying to focus on something else in the room, as if they weren’t even listening. 

After a long silence had passed. The man with the moustache coughed and broke the silence “very well... we can try this, but I suggest we plan for the worst, make sure our arsenal is full.” 

“Agreed” Kane responded, and with a round of murmurs in agreement, they all began to rise and trail out of the room. 

“I need to go and check on Aria, we will talk more later,” Abby told Clarke, and also left the room with Marcus following, but not before he gave Clarke an encouraging squeeze on the shoulder. 

Clarke stayed stunned, now standing, looking down at the table in front of her. She felt a weird sense of pride within herself, she thought if anything the people would have forgotten her by now, or at least she hoped. She was worried people would have blamed her for trusting Lexa, like Octavia did. 

Just as Clarke was deep in thought, a cough from beside her took her attention. 

It was Harpers Grandmother. “Child you are so much more than you even realise.” She said simply. “I have seen Chancellors come and I have seen Chancellors go, often elected due to their popularity amongst the rich.” There was a silent pause. “Everything happens for a reason, there is a reason our air up there failed us, there is reason an innocent girl was amongst the dropped. You are the reason it all happened now and not in another 50 years. You are who we need and you will not only see to our people’s survival, but you will see them prosper.”

Clarke wasn't sure what to say, she had no idea why this woman had so much faith in her. She let out a breath she had been holding and responded “what if I can't, what if our people are wrong about me, what if...” But before Clarke could continue Harpers grandmother cut her off. 

“What if you can?” she asked heading for the door and not waiting for a response. 

Clarke thought the people had gotten it wrong, she’s couldn’t be the person they needed, not when a huge part of her long to run away still and disappear, what leader would do that. But still, she was going to do everything she could to keep her people safe and it looked like taking Lexa up on her offer to visit Polis was Clarkes only option. Her heart sunk at the thought of seeing Lexa and she thought for a second she might actually throw up. But as quick as the feeling came it was taken over with hurt and rage. Clarke knew if she was going to get lexa’s help she was going to have bite her tongue and play nice. This frustrated Clarke even more, but her people were more important to her than her pride and her feelings. 

Clarke took a deep breath to compose herself from the world wind of emotions that was fighting inside of her, and finally headed for the door, knowing she had no time to waste and that she needed to prepare and head for Polis as soon as she could.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I have written pretty much the entire thing, it is just going back an editing, but I am feeling super lazy and want to get it out to you guys. So if there is anything in particular that is bothing you like a certain spelling or grammer, or a plot hole that I missed, just drop me a message!
> 
> Thanks again for reading, not long now until Clarke see's Lexa!

Chapter 15 

Clarke found herself leaving the meeting room, heading in the direction of Ravens workshop. She knew it would be smart to see what weapons Raven may have lying around for her to take on her trip, since she had left everything apart from her knife back in the forest. She planned to ride to Polis on her own, it would be quicker and a couple of days in the woods would do her good to clear her head ready for seeing Lexa. But she knew the path to Polis would be a lot more dangerous, with the bounty on her head and the recent attacks, so she didn’t want to take any chances, so she planned to be armed. 

Just as she was rounding a bend in the metal Ark, she nearly bumped straight into someone, luckily the other person was fast to react and held Clarke back and steady by her shoulders. “Sorry I didn’t see you” Clarke automatically started to say. 

Bellamy chuckled “no worries Clarke, where are you off to in such a hurry.”

Clarke smiled up at her friend, his hair was shorter than she had ever seen it since landing. It made him seem slightly younger, his eyes held less weight and his smile was light. She liked him like this, he even stood a little taller, a little prouder, clearly happy with who he had become. She had enjoyed their chat that they shared the previous night, she apologised for leaving, but he had said he had completely understood and was just glad she was back. 

Bellamy coughed slightly awkwardly, still waiting for a response, snapping Clarke out of her thoughts.

“oh ... erm... right, I was just heading to see Raven.” Clarke got out quickly. 

Bellamy nodded, and added “I was just in the med bay looking for you actually.” Bellamy confessed acting oddly shy about it.

Clarke felt the air around them start go weird and wanted to quickly lighten things up, so opted for; “looking for me or hoping to catch my friend Aria.” Clarke said with a laugh and eyebrows slightly raised. The others had teased him about his liking for the grounder the previous night, so Clarke thought it would be funny to tease him a little more. Or so she thought. 

Clarkes laughter slowly died out as she saw Bellamy wasn’t so amused by it and looked taken back a little. Clarkes immediate thought flew to Aria. “Bellamy what is wrong, is Aria ok?” Clarke said urgently, concern spreading across her face.

“Yes, yes of course, she was sleeping when I went in.” Bellamy said hastily to stop Clarkes fear.

“Then what’s wrong?” Clarke asked, confused what was making Bellamy act so odd.

“Look Clarke, the thing is,” Bellamy said pausing putting his right hand back onto Clarkes left shoulder. “I have really missed you and I’ve wanted to catch you alone since you got back.” Bellamy hand was slowly moving down Clarkes arm and clasped over her hand when he reached the tips of her fingers. 

Clarke was like a statue, unsure what to say or do. Maybe she was reading this wrong, but was Bellamy hitting on her?

“I was hoping we would be somewhere more private, but I heard you are heading to Polis soon, and I couldn’t let you go without telling you how I felt.” He said with a small smile and a gentle squeeze to Clarkes hand as he stepped closer to her. 

Clarke finally came to her sensors as Bellamy was moving closer and quickly took a step back and withdraw her hand. She immediately saw hurt across Bellamy’s face, and guilt filled her instantly. 

“Bellamy I am sorry but...” 

“Is it Finn?” Bellamy asked cutting her off. “I thought I had left it long enough, but I completely understand if it is too soon.” Bellamy said quickly, a bit of hope crossing his expression.

Clarke, wished she could just lie to Bellamy and tell him it was Finn, but she knew it wasn’t. Even if some part of her didn’t hold feelings for Lexa, she just didn’t see Bellamy that way, it would be hell of a lot easier if she did, but she didn’t. She had to be honest with him, he shouldn’t hold hope, it wasn’t fair to him.

Clarke slowly shook her head. “It’s not Finn, Bell, you are one of my best friends, like family to me, but I do not feel that way about you.” A tear was now growing in her eye, part of her terrified she was about to lose her friend, and another part was upset she was causing someone she cared deeply about, pain.

“Hey, Clarke it’s ok,” he said bringing his finger up to her face to wipe away a tear that was falling. “I am not going to deny this doesn’t hurt, but it’s ok, I understand, this won’t change anything between us ok?” he said comfortingly to Clarke. Clarke nodded and Bellamy brought her in for a hug. 

“Try not to be gone for so long this time yeah.” He said into her hair, trying to lighten the mood. 

Clarke pulled away letting out a slight laugh. “I’ll do my best she said.”

With that Bellamy nodded and headed past her down the corridor. 

.........

Not long after, Clarke gathered herself and made her way to find Raven.

“Well look what the panther dragged in”, Raven said with a smirk, not looking up from the project she was working on, her back to where Clarke entered.

“Hey that’s still fresh you know,” Clarke said with a playful scowl, not that Raven could see. And automatically moved her hand to sooth over where the panther had clawed her.

“Yeah, yeah whatever, don’t get your knickers in a twist will ya.” Raven said spinning to face her. “What can I assist your highness with this fine afternoon, Raven said with the usual gleam in her eyes. 

“I was hoping you might have some weapons for me, to help me on my way to Polis, and who knows, probably at Polis too,” Clarke said, letting the thought gloom over her. For all she knew Lexa may have her locked in some dungeon somewhere. Clarke shook the thought and focused back on Raven.

“You mean weapons for our trip!” Raven said emphasising the ‘our part’ “Most of the weapons are locked in the arsenal, so you will have to go through Kane for those... but don’t worry” Raven said with a wink, “I have a few of the best ones stashed away around here somewhere.” Raven turned and started rummaging around in the back of the room, under a work top. 

“Raven, I appreciate the offer, but I have to move fast and I know it hurts you to ride for too long.” Clarke said trying to let Raven down gently. The offer warmed her heart but, she had no idea what she was walking into and she couldn’t protect herself and worry about Raven’s safety as well.

Raven waved her hand in the air, over her head that was still hidden looking for something. “Don’t be daft Clarke, we are taking the rover, Monty and Jasper are already getting it fuelled up, it has been a while since we could take it out with the attacks you know.” Raven said as she lifted a case onto the table between her and Clarke. 

Clarke was confused. “Is Rover a horse?”

Ravens grin was wide and decided to pull the black large case off the table, taking Clarkes hand and pulling her out of the door.

A few minutes later, they had made their way through the Ark, into what looked like some hanger of sorts, and bang in the middle was an automobile. Clarkes jaw dropped. “Does it work?” She asked, still in shock of what she was looking at.

“Hell, yeah it does” Jasper said popping his head and shoulders out of the hatch on top of the machine, with a big grin on his face. “And I just hooked up some banging tunes for the ride.” He added before disappearing from wherever he came from in there.

Raven headed for the vehicle and slid the case into the boot of the truck, and waved Clarke over to join her as she opened it. “Ok so we have the basic hand guns, a couple automatics and some grenades, some smoke, some explosive Raven said, pointing at several, then closed it and flipped the latches and slid it under one of the benches, which acted as seats in the back.

It took Clarke a minute, trying to take everything in before she spoke. Clearly the word of her leaving got out quick and she was at least grateful knowing, no one went in the med bay much but her mum and Jackson, and even if they did, they wouldn’t be talking to Aria telling her about Clarkes plans. She knew she needed to talk to Aria properly and tell her she was leaving, but she planned to put it off as long as she could. It was going to be hard enough to try and make Aria stay when Clarke was here, but if Clarke was leaving, Aria would be dragging herself out of those gates trying to get back home before Clarke even made it to Polis. 

She suddenly noticed Raven looking at her expectantly. “Everything looks amazing Raven, but I don’t want to put you guys in any harm, I think it is best I go on my own.” She tried to explain.

“yeah.... no chance, I’ve been stuck in this metal rust bucket, for months whilst you were off gallivanting with your beautiful new lover, living some amazing life. I need to get out or I may explode, Talon, a grounder friend of mine from Ton D.C has described Polis to me many times, I have to see it. What’s the point in being on the ground if we are still living in the Ark?” she said stubbornly with her hands on her hips.

“I hear they have even better moonshine”, she heard Jasper shout somewhere from inside. “and other herbs” She heard Monty say from somewhere in the front seat. Then heard a high five and a laugh. 

This made Clarke smile. She knew there was no changing their minds, and maybe company wasn’t such a bad idea. Better than facing Lexa alone she thought. 

“She’s not my lover,” Clarke soon blurted out, remembering what raven had said. 

“Even better” Raven said with a devious grin. “She’s single, remind me to stop by the med bay to see how our grounder is getting on later.” Raven said heading back in the direction they had come from, stopping before she was too far, she turned around. “We can’t leave until the day after tomorrow though.” Raven informed Clarke.

“What are you talking about, it’s kind of an urgent mission Raven.” Clarke said slightly annoyed.

“Octavia left for Ton D.C with Lincoln this morning, she would be so pissed if we went to Polis without them.” Raven said simply, like it was obvious.   
Clarke stood clearly not satisfied with that answer. 

Raven took a step closer. “Look Clarke think of it like this, if you left now, we would still beat you to Polis.”

“Not if I went on Gilbert,” Clarke argued.

Raven scratched the back of her head and looked anywhere but Clarkes eyes. “Ermm... yeah well, he is kinda with Octavia.” 

“What!” Clarke exclaimed 

“Well, she didn’t know you would need him so soon.” Raven defended.

“He’s not my horse Raven, he’s Arias” Clarke said annoyed.

Raven paused for a few moments longer deciding whether to continued and soon decided she had no choice. 

“Well, that’s the thing” Raven tried playfully to lighten the mood. “Aria said Octavia could borrow him.”  
Now, that had Clarke even more confused. “Aria gave Octavia permission?” Clarke asked.

“Seems like Octavia has developed a soft spot for the horse since he arrived, Octavia loves the horses and well it turns out Lincoln kinda knows your grounder, he actual seemed a little stumped when he heard her name, made him go all nervous, it was weird, I was there. Anyways, long story short, Octavia, Lincoln and Aria are all buddy-buddy and they said they would deliver her letter to Ton D.C personally, so there fastest rider could try and get to her family’s place by tonight.” Raven explained, trying to catch her breath. 

Clarke wasn’t sure what to think or feel, she was very confused and would have to get the full story another time. She felt a tad of jealously wash over her, she wasn’t sure why, but she didn’t like that others knew Aria, Clarke wanted to keep Aria and that part of her life for herself, but it made Clarke feel better Aria has had some company since being here, and that Dauriel, Thomas and Noah would no longer be fretting about them. 

With no response from Clarke, Raven began to turn away again.

“Raven wait, I was wondering if you could do me a favour?” Clarke asked stepping closer to Raven.

“Sure Clarke, you know I can never say no to those big blue eyes of yours.” Raven said with a smile.

“If you have time today, could you check on Aria for me, if Octavia and Lincoln aren’t back for a while, I don’t want her to be alone.” Clarke said.

Raven now looked confused, “why aren’t you visiting her, lovers spat?” Raven quickly added. 

That brought a slight smile to Clarke.

“I found out something, something I am still trying to process and I am not ready to talk to her and put it behind me just yet.” Clarke informed Raven.

“Clarke you can’t just decide when you can put it behind you, but if will never happen if you don’t talk to her, but sure I would be more than happy to, any chance to speak to a pretty lady”, Raven said with a wink and spun on her heals and out of sight.


	16. Chapter Sixteen

Chapter 16

Clarke woke early the next day. She knew she couldn’t put off seeing Aria any longer.

She thought about heading to get breakfast first, but Clarke had barely felt hungry since she agreed to go to Polis. She didn’t think it was possible but waiting to leave, just made the nervous pit in her stomach worse. She was still slightly annoyed Octavia had taken Gilbert, but she was looking forward to spending more time with her friends. The woods could get lonely and she hadn’t been properly alone since she met Aria. 

She pulled on her boots and slowly made her way to the med bay.

With the familiar sound of sliding doors, she entered to see Aria alone, sat with her legs swung over the side of her bed. Aria’s eyes immediately flew to Clarke, very alert for danger as ever.

“Aria what are you doing, you are hurt, you need to rest.” She said commanding, stepping closer and putting a hand on Arias shoulder, helping her lean back on the bed. Aria winced a couple of times, trying to get comfortable.

“It’s ok Clarke your mum said, I should start moving more today.” Aria reassured. 

“I am sure she meant slight movements and under her supervision.” Clarke said with a scowl.

“I am bored Clarke, I have never been in such a place, how did you stand it your whole life, I need to see the sky and smell the fresh air.” Aria said longingly, her gaze landing on the tiny glass window.

“I am sorry I haven’t been to see you,” Clarke said, taking a step back, feeling guilty about abandoning Aria.

“It’s ok Clarke I am just glad you are here at all. I thought I had lost you.” Aria said looking distraught at the thought. I know how much people have hurt you, the betrayals you have faced, with your mum and the commander. Aria paused, taking a glance at Clarke to see if it was ok to continue or if she was going to bolt again. “I was scared Clarke. Sometimes I forgot how we even met, and then the times when the opportunity came up to tell you, I thought you might leave and I knew there was a bounty on your head and I didn’t want to cause you to be in danger.” 

Before Aria could continue Clarke cut her off “worried you would be in trouble with the commander if I left and you lost me?” Clarke said rising anger clear in her voice.

“No, it wasn’t like that, please just let me explain.” Aria pleaded.

Clarke nodded so Aria continued. “The commander asked me to find you and make sure you were safe then report back. “I went to your camp and waited in the tree lines, hoping to confirm you were safe inside your walls so I could get home. When I saw you and your people return, but that you didn’t go in, I knew I had to stay with you until you were safe.” Aria took a deep breath, the words falling quickly out her mouth was leaving her breathless. “You were close to the Clear Sands village Clarke, you know this, they are exceptionally friendly, and take in even the outcasts of the dessert. I knew you would be safe there and I could have gone home.”

“So why show yourself to me” Clarke asked.

“I could feel your pain just by looking at you. I could see the moments when you wanted to give up. But you didn’t Clarke. I could see your strength and I wanted to help you myself. I knew I couldn’t just help you by watching you from the tree and protecting you from predators. I could see what you needed and I wanted to give it you.” Aria explained.

“And what did I need?” Clarke said annoyed.

“It was clear you hadn’t had a moment of peace in a long time, or just have been able to relax in one place, not having to worry about what will happen tomorrow. So, I thought the farm would be good for you. I could tell you were a good person, from the way Lexa had spoken of you. You needed a home Clarke; it didn’t seem like you had one. Everyone deserves a home, somewhere they feel safe and wanted.” Aria finished in a nervous silence. 

“And of course, you needed me” Aria quickly added, slightly unsure if it was the time for a joke.

Clarke took a moment to take what Aria had said in. Clarke felt relief fill her, knowing that it was Aria’s choice and not an order from the commander. She just wished she hadn’t been so stupid and come spoken to Aria sooner. But before Clarke could put it in the past she needed to ask “did they know? Your parents and Noah that is?”

Aria nodded. “I had to visit the commander and let her know you were safe, so I told them everything before I left that morning.” 

“So, you didn’t go hunting.” Clarke said more as a statement.

“I did on my way back.” Aria told her.

Clarke nodded, facing away so Aria couldn’t see her face. Clarke took a deep breath, trying to not think about what just hit her like a brick. The thought had crossed Clarkes mind but now she had confirmation it was too much. She didn’t know why it made her feel so upset, but her heart sank at the thought. Lexa knew. Lexa knew where she was this whole time, but didn’t come and find her. Part of her felt happy that she had cared to send Aria, but she clearly didn’t care that much, maybe she just wanted Clarke watched in case she did something stupid after the betrayal.

“Clarke.... are you ok?” Aria asked wincing slightly again as she sat up.

Clarke collected herself and spun around at the sound of Arias discomfort.

“Wow be careful I am fine.” Clarke assured. “I am so so sorry Aria, I left you in here, in this foreign place on your own, I’m such an awful person I should had given you the chance to explain, I at least owed you that after everything you have done for me.” Clarke spoke in a flurry.

“Don’t worry Clarke, your mum has been amazing, I can see where you get your kindness from, and I have had a lot of time to get to know Octavia and spoken with Lincoln. Even your friend Raven came by last night to see me. Not that I am complaining but she pretty much ended up laying across my bed, I nearly fell out. That girl can talk.” Aria laughed, with a big grin thinking about the previous night. 

“That sounds like Raven.” Clarke chuckled back. She still never could figure out how Aria does this. She can make Clarke feel so at ease and lighten the mood so quickly. She was truly grateful for having her in her life.

“So, Raven says we leave after breakfast.” Aria stated taking a sip of her water that was on the table next to her. 

That snapped Clarkes attention instantly. “and where on earth is Raven taking you?” Clarke asked confused.

“To polis, tomorrow with you, she filled me in on everything. Said she would help make me comfy on the ride whatever that means.” Aria shared with Clarke.

Clarke inwardly cringed at Ravens attempts to flirt with Aria, but ignored it and told Aria, “you are not well enough to travel Aria, I was just about to tell you about my leaving, but my mum will take good care of you I promise.”

“I don’t need to be well enough to travel, Raven said she will put me on something she called a stretcher and into one of the old-world metal contraptions, not that I am looking forward to that and that we would arrive not long afternoon. Can you believed; it would usually take days to get to Polis!” Aria practically squealed in excitement!

Before Clarke could protest, Aria continued. “I am not staying here, whilst you are in Polis. I know Polis like the back of my hand including the people there. You don’t know Lexa like I do; it’s going to be hard to make her budge on something that can risk the alliance, the alliance is her life, its everything she ever worked for. Your people have been kind, they don’t deserve the destruction that Azgeda brings.” Aria said this with more seriousness than she had ever seen on her friend’s face. Clearly a story with Azgeda in her past. “If there is anything, I can do to help I want to.” 

Clarke was taken back a little, she had noticed Aria slip and call the commander by her name at times, but she didn’t know that she even knew Lexa that well. Just when Clarke was about to ask, just how well Aria knew Lexa, her mum walked in through the doors. 

“Ahh Clarke I am glad you are here. I wanted to run over a few things about Aria’s treatment plan, and when you will need to remove her stitches.” Abby said, walking over and picking up a clipboard.

“What are you talking about mum?” Clarke asked confused.

“Most will dissolve but there are a few you will have to take out yourself, and I have some medicine for you to take just in case.” Abby said trying to clarify.

“And why won’t you be taking out her stitches yourself?” Clarke said with her arms crossed in front of her. Knowing she already knew what the answer was going to be.

“Oh erm...” Abbey muttered out, looking between Clarke and Aria, sensing tension. “Raven mentioned....”

“And you agreed!” Clarke exclaimed, cutting her mother off.

“Her stitches are strong, as long as she doesn’t do any drastic movements for a few more days, she will be back too normal in no time. There is no longer anything that is life threatening. You will be in Polis in a matter of hours, and Aria has promised she will not leave her bed there for at least a few more days. It was made clear to me that she was either leaving for Polis with you, or would be leaving, straight after you left. Now I can stand here and pretend I could stop her, but I can’t stop my own daughter from sneaking out, so how am I supposed to stop a grounder warrior if she wanted?” Abby asked Clarke.

Clarke held her mother’s stare for a few moments and then sighed in defeat. “Fine, but if you are in pain or in any way hurting, I am turning that Automobile around and coming straight back.” Clarke said compromising.

Aria had a massive grin, and Abby nodded and carried on to her office. 

Clarke, spent the rest of the day with Aria, catching up on what she had missed. She mentioned what happened with Bellamy and Aria was as comforting as ever, making her feel better. Then not long before lunch, Raven rocked up with some fixed-up wheel chair, and Clarke and Raven took Aria on a tour of the Ark and to get some lunch. Clarke enjoyed sharing this part of her with Aria, telling her stories of the Ark. She had already told her a bit about it over the past few months, but for Aria to be able to see it and meet her friends, brought a smile to Clarke face. And for a few hours, it felt nice to Clarke, not having to think or worry too much of what the next day was going to bring.


	17. Chapter Seveteen - A Bump in the Road

Chapter 17

The sun was bright, but the air was crisp and frosty against Clarkes skin. She just left Gilbert, saying goodbye to him in the stables. She wore her favourite black fur lined jacket that she took from the wardrobe in her room back home, Black tight fitted jeans and her boots. Her hair was loose but crinkled, from plaits she had took out when she woke up. She had her knife strapped to her thigh and a sword across her back that Octavia had offered her the previous night when she had returned. Clarke wanted to leave for Polis as soon as they got back, but soon agreed with the others that it was best her and Lincoln had at least one night’s rest, they never knew what would happen in Polis. Clarke barely slept; her nightmares had returned more strongly now that she was back in the Ark. She heard what Aria had said about the mountain, but she couldn’t help relive it when she was asleep, seeing all them bodies, the children’s it was always too much. So, with the nightmares and the nerves for the journey, she had ended up drawing to try and calm her. She had left her sketch book back in her room at Aria’s, so had to use some old paper that she could find.

She now headed to the Rover, hoping everyone would be there ready.

She had enjoyed her breakfast and was glad it wasn’t awkward when she had sat with Bellamy and the others. But she had noticed Aria being oddly quiet today. She had brought her breakfast with a fresh pair of clothing and green jacket for the journey as her old clothes were ripped from the panther. But Aria could barely look at Clarke. When she had asked if everything was ok, Aria reassured her she was fine, and just said she was nervous about riding in the vehicle. Clarke didn’t fully believe that was it but didn’t push any further.

When Clarke arrived, the garage door was already open, and it looked like they were just about to put Aria in on her stretcher. It was later in the morning than Clarke had hoped but Raven was tied up and said she would be a little longer. 

As Clarke got closer Raven headed towards her and met her in the middle. “Clarke I am really sorry but Sinclair needs me to stay here, the council have him working on a bunch of stuff, in case Azgeda attack, he could really use my help” Raven said looking gutted that she could not join them.

“Hey it’s ok” Clarke said reassuringly, stepping closer and putting a friendly hand on Ravens shoulder. “I’m sorry you won’t get to see Polis; I know you were really looking forward to it.” 

Raven sighed and looked over at where Aria was being lifted and disappearing into the back of the Rover. “Do me a favour Clarke?” Raven asked looking back at Clarke.

“Sure, anything” Clarke responded.

“Try keep any grounder folk away from Aria for me” Raven said with a wink and smile spreading across her face. “ooo and bring me something nice back like a keychain.” Her mood instantly changing.

Clarke couldn’t help but chuckle, “Raven I’m not going to Paris like in the old movies, I doubt they sell keychains.”

Raven shrugged, “You never know.”

“I’ll have a look for you.” Clarke promised.

“Get there safe yeah” Raven told her.

“I will.” Clarke said with a smile and went to take Raven into a hug.

As Raven pulled away, she handed Clarke a radio she had been working on and told her it should work even from Polis and stick to channel 2, to keep in touch. Clarke slipped it into the backpack that she had over one shoulder. She had brought a spare pair of clothes and some underwear and kept some ammo and a small hand gun. She couldn’t quite bring herself to wear one again quite yet. She didn’t like how it felt in her hand anymore, It was like all the weight she had managed to lift in the past few months, came bearing down on her again. So, she opted to leave it in her bag for now. 

She said goodbye to her mum, and then slid into the back taking a seat across from Lincoln and Octavia with Aria lay between them. Monty and Jasper dived into the front, with a “woooo road trip,” from Monty and a “I’ll get the tunes going” from Jasper who was in the passenger seat and then they were soon whizzing off through the Ark gates.

.....

So far, the journey had been smooth sailing, and everyone was laughing at a joke that Jasper just told, when suddenly, they heard a pop and the Rover slowed and spun slightly to the right. It sounded like one of the front wheels blew out. 

“Must have gone over a sharp branch or something” Octavia let out with groan.

“ermm guys... there some big ass scary looking grounders out there.” Monty let out muttering nervously.

“Azgeda” is all Lincoln said in a hush voice. 

“Quick grab the weapons” Hurried Clarke.

“They will have archers in the trees, as soon as we expose our self they will shoot.” Aria informed calmly, going into a sitting position. 

They sat in silence for a moment, contemplating their options.

“Give us Wanheda and the others walk” a female voice said from the front of the rover.

“Well, that’s bullshit.” Octavia huffed, clenching her sword so hard her knuckles were going red.

“That’s Echo.” Aria said clearly thinking, after hearing the Azgeda’s voice.

Aria moved a fur that was covering her and started to get up.

“What are you doing?” Clarke asked with concerned eyes.

“She won’t harm me Clarke, it’s our only option, just stay out of sight.”

“You can’t be serious.” Clarke said grabbing her arm to stop her as she was scooting in pain to the back doors. 

“Trust me” Aria asked intensely looking back at Clarke.

After a moment of thinking, Clarke eased her grip on Aria, she did trust her.

“I’ll come with you” Lincoln offered.

“Lincoln they wouldn’t hesitate to kill you, we can’t risk it.” Aria said as she braced herself to open the   
door.

Lincoln nodded. This confused Clarke, why would they kill Lincoln but not Aria, maybe word had spread of Lincoln’s involvement with the sky people and saw him as one of us she thought.

Clarke reached down to the case and unclicked it, passing out the weapons to Monty and Jasper and tightly clutching one herself just in case.

Aria held her side that must have been hurting, as she opened one of the doors and scuttled out onto her feet. She slowly rounded towards the front of the vehicle to where the grounders were stud.

Aria spoke in Grounder. Clarkes grounder was still rusty, but from what she could make out, she announced her name and something to do with the commander. Just as she was struggling to follow, Lincoln began to translate in a hush tone. “How have you come to be with the sky people?” He translated what the Echo woman said.

“I was injured near their camp by a panther attack, they helped me and are now returning me back to Polis.” 

There was an eerie silence and tension was building. Clarkes finger was ready on the trigger.

She took a chance and peered over Jaspers shoulder. She could she a tall woman, stood not too far from Aria, with serval others around her, they all had scars on their face and in giant fur coats, signalling they were from Azgeda. She saw the woman glance above to the trees, clearly thinking her options with her archers.

Aria now spoke in English “As I already said Wanheda is not here, just a few skaikru with mountain men weapons, trying to escort me back. Are you really willing to start a war with the commander? She may have forgiven the queens treachery once, when she harmed someone the commander cared about in the past.” Clarke knew she was referring to Costia. “But she will not be so forgiving if you harm me, I am sure your queen does not want to risk her position in the coalition.” Aria warned with a stern loud voice that didn’t waver. 

Clarke felt a punch to her stomach, that could only mean one thing, Lexa cares for Aria as she did Costia. 

Clarke swallowed down the ache in her heart that Lexa had someone else special other than Clarke, she was a fool to have think she was special, it was just one kiss, the commander probably hasn’t even thought twice about it. But this was not the time, Clarke thought. She needs to focus on getting out of this situation.

“Let us escort you back to polis.” Echo offered.

“That is not necessary, I’ll be far more comfortable in the company I already have, and I will get there far sooner” Aria said with dismissal, not caring to offend them.

“Enjoy your time in polis, I am sure it won’t be long until we meet again.” Echo said in a fake friendly voice with a sly grin.

The grounders slowly turned and walked away, back into the tree line, on the orders of the woman.

Aria stood still watching them go.

Lincoln said “I need to follow them to make sure they leave. Wait in the safety of this for some time, and then start your way on foot to Polis, I will meet you there”

“Wow, hold your horses their big guy, we aren’t walking anywhere, we will just change the tire with the spare.” Jasper offered.

Lincoln was taking back a little, not knowing that was even an option. “Very well, I will follow them in the trees to make sure they haven’t left anyone behind and I will come back once it is safe.” Lincoln didn’t wait for a response and was out the door, and disappeared in no time. Aria clocked him and headed back to the back on the Rover. When she met Clarkes eyes, Clarke could see Aria was uncomfortable and felt guilty. 

Before they could exchange words, Jasper was moved into the back, blocking Clarkes view. “Clarke, the spare tire is under your seat, you are going to have to budge.” Jasper told her.

Clarke slid out of the rover and took a deep breath next to Aria, but eyes locked on what Jasper was doing. Her heart was racing from the near danger they were in only moments ago, she tried to clear her mind to try and think of how she could help, but she was just stood dazed at what had happened. 

Monty looked like he was working on getting the old one off, whilst Jasper was trying to manoeuvre the new one out of the Rover. Octavia had gone to search the tree line, in case of any danger and hoping she would see Lincoln return soon.

A grunt from her side brought her out of thought. “Aria you need to sit down, I need to check your stitches, you might have pulled some loose.” Clarke said going into full doctor mode.

Before Aria could protest that she was fine, Clarke was guiding her over to a nearby rock for her to sit on. 

After a few minutes of Clarke checking all of Aria’s wounds, she gave a nod to herself, certain that Aria was ok. Clarke stood looking down at Aria. She suddenly felt very awkward and thought best she be elsewhere. “I’ll go see how the guys are getting on.” Clarke said turning to head back nearer the rover.

“Clarke wait.” Aria said, stopping Clarke in her track. “Please sit, we need to talk.” Aria gestured to the space next to her. 

They both sat awkwardly looking at Jasper and Monty argue about something to do with the wheel, in front of them.

Aria broke the silence. “Clarke you have become like family to me and I do not want there to be anymore secrets between us. I wanted to tell you when you forgave me the other day. But I was so happy I had you back and so scared I’d lose you again. I knew I had to tell you soon and that you would obviously find out once we got to Polis, but I wanted you to hear it from me. I was going to tell you when we next stopped, but of course then this happened.” Aria took in a deep breath to continue. “Clarke, I know you have history with Lexa.” Clarke’s heart sank, did she know about the kiss? Or was she talking about the betrayal? Clarke thought to herself. “Well, the thing is, I do too...” 

“Hey guys, we got the spare on, do you want any berry’s before we get going.” Monty asked.

“I am ok thanks Monty” Clarke said at the same time her belly rumbled. 

“You sure about that Clarke?” Monty laughed “Come on we have some cheese and bread as well.” He waved them to follow him to the back of the rover, where Jasper was pulling out their food supply.

Clarke felt sick, she had no idea why her stomach rumbling, because food was the last thing she wanted right now, she wasn’t even sure she would be able to hold it down. She wasn’t upset that Aria didn’t tell her about her relationship with the commander. It was their own private business, so Clarke couldn’t help but wonder why she felt so bad. It was only a kiss they shared; Clarke shouldn’t have read into it. She hated the commander for what she had done, but Clarke knew deep down, she still cared. But Aria was her family and she wasn’t going to lose her. She just needed to focus on getting Lexa’s help and then getting back to the Ark. 

Clarke turned to Aria, where she still sat beside her. Aria was about to say something when Clarke beat her to it. “Don’t worry Aria, I know what you are going to say, I heard you telling the Echo person. I am not upset; I understand why you didn’t tell me. You don’t have any more secrets I need to know about do you?” Clarke said with an awkward laugh, trying to lighten the mood.

“You know a few weeks ago when you, me and Noah camped out by the river?” Aria said with a grin.

“mmmhmmm” Clarke said not looking amused at where this was going.

“Well, it wasn’t Noah who accidently knocked your shoes into the water it was me.” Aria revealed.

Clarke hit her arm, “What, you told me it was Noah and that he felt terrible, so I didn’t say anything to him to upset him, I had to walk all the way back in no Shoes!” Clarke said shocked. 

“Ouch! I am injured here you know, remember from that time I jumped in front of a giant hungry panther for you.” Aria said exaggeratedly.

Clarke knew Aria meant it jokingly but it instantly wiped the smile off Clarkes face. Clarke looked up into Arias eyes, her own filled with guilt and gratitude. “I never truly thanked you for that. You saved my life Ar, I was so scared I wouldn’t make it to my mum in time.” Clarke said looking at the ground, remembering that long ride, constantly listening for a heartbeat.

Aria nudged Clarkes chin, encouraging her to look at her. “I am here, we are both here and I don’t know about you but cheese sounds great right now.” Aria said with a warm smile.

Clarke couldn’t help but respond with her own smile and stood up, helping Aria to her feet. Clarke wanted to know more about Lexa and Aria, was it in the past and if so, how long in the past? Was it before or after Costia? But Clarke was already in overload and thought it best to find out at a later date, she wasn’t so sure she could bare the answer.

Lincoln returned as they were eating, letting them know the grounders were long gone and it was safe. Octavia and Lincoln ate a little and they set back off on their path.


	18. Chapter Eighteen

Chapter 18

It was growing darker now, Clarke soon realised when she landed in the drop ship, the time of the sunset was always changing and now in winter, it grew dark early. 

It was late before they could see a small light in the distance. Aria had called it the flame and had said that it was the Commanders Tower.

“We can go in through the tunnels”, Aria said as they were thinking what the best way to approach the capital was. “We should leave this old-world machine, a good distance from Polis, it will unnerve some people and they may think of you as a threat.”

“I know a place we can leave it near the backside of the capital.” Lincoln offered.

Aria nodded. “Good that will give us access to the tunnels at the back of the tower and we can avoid the night markets and get in unseen.”

With the plan in motion, everyone stayed quiet the rest of the way, no one quite sure of what to expect, even Jasper turned off the music and hadn’t said a word.

Clarke didn’t know how to feel. She was full of so many different emotions, and decided she needed to block them all out and focus on getting the help her people needed, and then she could get as far away from Lexa as she wanted.  
.....

The last part of the journey went by quick. Before she knew it, she could hear their feet echoing through the tunnels as they failed to be as quiet as possible. Octavia and Lincoln had one end of Aria’s stretcher each. Aria had argued she could walk, but she was already looking paler and tired after the long day they have had. They had eaten the left-over food they had packed before they set off on foot. After leaving later than planned, the flat tire and a fallen tree they had come across later in their journey, they arrived a lot later than anticipated and it was getting late. She would be surprise if anyone was still awake.

Monty walked with jasper at the front with a torch, he had put the brightness on the lowest setting, just enough for them to see. And Clarke trailed at the back behind Octavia, Lincoln and Aria.

“This tunnel should lead us to the gardens” Aria whispered. “From there we can present ourselves at the back doors to the tower.”

No one responded, no one needed too and they all knew they shouldn’t talk unless they really had too. Clarke was just glad Aria was back to acting normal with her again. She had never not been at ease around Aria, so she hadn’t liked the way things felt before they set off. Now that Clarke knew about her and the commander, Aria was back to her old self.

Soon Clarke notice Monty switching off his torch, her eyes took a moment to adjust, she could see the moon light reflecting not too far ahead. 

A few metres later and Clarke took a deep breath as she stepped out of the tunnel, the tunnel had smelt musty, and smelt like the animals that called it their home. There were no clouds tonight and the moon was nearly full. With the stars and moon, Clarke could see the shadows of the trees and bushes that lined the small clearing around them. Clarke couldn’t help but wonder what it would look like in the day time. As Clarke looked ahead, her eyes met a circular grey bricked building, as she took in the sight, her eyes began to roam it, following it up. It soon hurt Clarkes neck as she looked up so high, not sure if it was ever going to end. But at the top she could just make out the flicker of the flame. 

Clarke looked around at her friends and noticed the tower was having the same effect on them as well. Clarke didn’t miss the knowing smirk Aria and Lincoln were giving to each other.

Eventually Aria grew bored. “Come on guys lets get...” But before Aria could finish her sentence. A swarm of armed guards circled the group, blocking off their exit behind them. They draw their swords and waited for orders. A tall man with a long beard stepped forward and commanded “Lay down your weapons.” His hand gripped against his sheathed sword.

“Arkan it is me Aria, we are here for an audience with the commander.” Aria said in a confident voice, from where Octavia and Lincoln were still carrying her. 

“Aria” Arkan repeated, with a slight bow in his head out of respect, but his grip on his sword tightened as he saw what state she was in. “What did they do to you.” He said unsheathing his sword, ready to attack.

“It is not what you think” Aria responded without haste, leaning on one of her elbows and facing him. “They are my friends, and have helped me, take us to the commander Arkan.”

Arkan hesitated but eventually lowered his swords. “We still need your weapons it is Polis law.” Arkan informed.

They all looked at each other unsure, but then Lincoln began to take out his knife and threw it on the floor in front of him. The others followed his lead. 

Soon they were stood with a pile of weapons in front of them. Clarke felt vulnerable, but this was her only choice. She wanted to do whatever she could to avoid bloodshed, whether it was her peoples or even Azgeda’s. Clarke couldn’t pretend it hadn’t crossed her mind; she could have just gone to war with Azgeda. Azgeda has the numbers but they had the weapons, but Clarke couldn’t kill anymore, she wanted peace.

Arkan whispered to one of the guards next to him, and the woman disappeared out of sight.

Arkan motioned for them to follow. Aria lay back down to stabilise herself.

They entered into the tower and into a lift. There was a long awkward silence and they moved higher and higher, there was only three guards with them now. 

They came out of the lift and were shown down a corridor to some giant double doors. Two guards pushed them open simultaneously. They entered the room; it was mainly dark but some lanterns kept it light enough to be able to see the whole room. Clarke’s heart was pounding against her chest, Lexa’s throne sat on a stage at the far side, but to Clarkes surprise, no Lexa, Clarke noticed, half expecting to see her there in her war paint, playing with her knife as she did the first time Clarke saw her.

Barely a few seconds later, just as Clarke was taking in the room, she heard the doors open again behind them. Clarke spun around, just in time to see the fiery woman enter. Her presence already commanded the room before she spoke and her green eyes caught with Clarkes. Clarke felt like she couldn’t breathe, those eyes had haunted her every time she closed her eyes for months. Now she was really here, staring into them. It felt so surreal, Clarkes couldn’t help but let her eyes roamed over her. Lexa wore a simple, brown, silk robe, she had her hands still on the ropes where she was pulling it tightly closed and her hair flowed freely to one side. Clarke didn’t expect this, this was not the Lexa Clarke thought she was going to meet. No war paint, no armour. Lexa looked so young, so different, peaceful even. 

Their eyes locked for only a moment, before Lexa’s soon darted to where Aria was still being held by Octavia and Lincoln. Lexa dashed straight to her side and put a hand on Arias arm where there were visible stitches and rubbed her thumb just under it. Clarke had to remind herself that she didn’t care. 

“What happened?” Lexa asked urgently, her voice laced with concern. Before Aria could even open her mouth to answer. Lexa turned to one of her guards. “Send for the healer.” 

“Lex that is really not necessary.” Aria said trying to sit up. Lexa put pressure on her to stay as she was, sending her daggers with her look. The guard left immediately to do as commanded. She might not look like the commander, but there was no mistaking that she was, that was for sure.

“It happened a few days ago, me and Clarke were hunting and a Panther took us by surprise. Clarke managed to finish the Panther off and got me back to her people, where her mother healed me.” Aria explained. “I just need a few days rest and I will be good as new, I promise” Aria said with a gentle smile.

Lexa simply nodded and took a step back from Aria and turned to Clarke. “Thank you so much for saving her, I owe you and your people a great debt.

Clarke wasn’t sure what came over her, her anger had built the moment she heard Aria called her Lex, not towards Aria though but Lexa, how could she kiss Clarke, how could she do that to Aria, and for Lexa to just act like it never happened, she didn’t even seem guilty about it. Then to say that she owed her a debt. How dare she, she was Aria’s friend, she didn’t save her for a reward. 

“A great debt?” Clarke said, her voice loud and taken by anger. “You have got to be kidding me, I could care less what you think, I saved her because I care about her, I don’t need your thanks. How about you thank my people, by actually doing something and stop them from being taken and murdered by your people!” Clarke practically yelled. 

Lexa barely flinched, she hated how calm she always was. 

Clarke was stood still, breathing heavily as a long silence began to draw out.

“It is late, you must all be exhausted from your journey.” Lexa said calmly and simply, acting like what Clarke had just said never happened. “Lara, please escort them to the guest rooms on the floor below.” She said to the grounder who had followed her into the room. “Balen and Troy take Aria to her room and make sure she gets comfortable. Are any of you hungry?” Lexa asked. 

Octavia answered for them “No we haven’t long eaten Commander.”

“Very well, I will make sure the cooks have lots prepared for breakfast for you all.” With that Lexa was gone out of the room.


	19. Chapter Nineteen

Chapter 19

For a few moments they all just awkwardly stood there, the tension still running high from Clarkes outburst. But soon the two guards took Aria from Octavia and Lincoln, Clarke was just about to protest, but Aria promised her she would be fine and would see her in the morning.

Clarke and the others followed the grounder Lexa had called Lara. She did not head in the direction of the lift they had arrived in. But instead headed the other way to an old wooden door that led to some stairs. They did not go down many, but Clarke could see they went on and on. Clarke was glad they did not have to climb them on the way up earlier.

Clarke had not said a word since the throne room. Lexa being so calm only infuriated her more. She wasn’t sure what she expected but it wasn’t this. Clarke didn’t realise how irrelevant she was to Lexa. She seemed perfectly content here in her tower, like nothing of the past bothered her even slightly. Lexa was all Clarke had thought of for months, Lexa practically had consumed her, she had never felt such an impact from someone on herself. Clarke was angry that Lexa could be so at peace when she had suffered. Living with the memory of the past, of the horrors that lay within Mount Weather in her nightmares. If Lexa had not taken the deal, Clarke would not have to of gone through all that, she couldn’t even face staying with her people. Whilst Lexa was here, in her warm tower, not giving a second thought to Clarke or the pain she caused. Maybe the kiss had just been a game to get Clarkes trust. Lexa always seemed sure their plan wouldn’t last very long in battle, maybe she knew she needed Clarke’s loyalty. Surely Aria would not have support that, or been interested in Lexa if she was that type of person. Clarke thought it wasn’t her business, Aria can choose whoever she wants as her partner and Clarke would be happy for her.

With the thousands of thought racing through Clarkes head, none really truly making any sense. Clarke had not notice Monty and Jaspers disappearance and only came out of thought when Octavia had touched her arm to get her attention.

“Hey, are you ok?” Octavia asked looking concerned. 

“I am fine, just tired, it’s been a long day.”

Octavia nodded and said “me and Lincoln are going to take this room, are you ok with that one.” She said pointing at the one directly across the hall from the one she had chosen for herself and Lincoln. Lara stood awkwardly a few feet away.

“Monty and Jasper took the one next to mine and Lincolns with the two beds” Octavia told Clarke, realising Clarke was not paying attention since they left the throne room.

Clarke smiled as a thank you and said “have a good night’s sleep, I will see you in the morning.” Octavia looked hesitant to leave, but with a nudge from Lincoln she left Clarke be. 

Clarke heard a cough from beside her as she watched Octavia and Lincoln close the door behind them. It was an unsettling feeling being alone here. 

Lara motioned towards the other room and opened the door for Clarke. Clarke entered but slowed her step as she came into the room. Clarke was speechless, it reminded her more of her room at Arias than on the Ark, but so much bigger and so much more fur. Clarke forgot all about what she was thinking for a moment and could only imagine sinking into the giant bed that stood in the middle of the room.

“There is a jug of water and glass on the table near the balcony, is there anything else I can get you this evening?” the woman offered.

“No, I am fine thank you... actually, can you tell me where Arias room is?.” Clarke said still looking at the bed.

“Hers is directly above yours.” A moment later Clarke heard the door close behind her. It seemed like a lifetime since she had said goodbye to Raven, but now she was here in Polis, Clarke couldn’t quite believe it.

Clarke sat on the edge of the bed. The comfort under her tantalising her to fall back. But before she could, she got out the radio Raven had given her and tried to contact her. There was no answer, so Clarke thought she would try in the morning.

Clarke slipped of her boots and jacket and flopped back.

....  
She was unsure how much time had passed but all she could do was toss and turn. Eventually Clarke sat up and slipped her boots back on. She left her room, heading back towards the stairs. Clarke reached up to knock on the door in front of her, but she didn’t want to wake Aria if she was already asleep. So, she decided to slide through the door quietly. 

The room was dark but had a few candles still burning to light Clarkes view. It took a moment for Clarkes eyes to adjust. To her left was a fireplace, where it still held red pieces of coal, letting off some warmth. The room was twice the size of Clarks guest room. It had a small seating area by the fire, a small table to eat at, by the side of the balcony and a large bed, shooting out from the right-hand side of the room. But to Clarkes surprise, Aria was nowhere in sight. Clarke took the opportunity to have a closer look at the room. Lexa had called it Arias, so Clarke wondered if Aria left anything here to make it hers. Aria was big on tapestries at the farm, so Clarke was surprised to not see at least one hanging. 

Clarke wandered over to the fireplace, and the bookcase to the right of it took Clarkes eye. Clarke ran her hands across the spines of the books, taking in a deep breath, the old musky book smell reached her nose, making Clarke smile at the familiar scent. She reached up and pulled out one of the books at random and read to herself “Romeo and Juliette.”

“Do people not know how to knock in space Clarke” said a voice from the other side of the room.

Clarke jolted, spinning around; her heart jumped in shock at the familiar voice. The book hit the ground with a thud, but Clarke seemed to be locked in place. Her mouth managing to open a little, but nothing seemed to come out. 

A few moments passed as blue eyes locked with green. Then footsteps grew closer. Lexa reached down for the book beside Clarkes foot. As Lexa stood back up, she was mere inches from Clarke. Clarke could feel the heat rising off of her and the familiar smell of the forest. Lexa smirked as she read, the title. 

“Romeo and Juliette, have you read it Clarke?” Lexa asked, her smirk somehow reaching her eyes.

Clarke wanted to scream, be angry, storm out, anything, but all she could do was shake her head. 

“It is about two lovers. Each belonging to their own people. Their people hated one another, but fate somehow, against all odds brought them together. As much as they knew they shouldn’t, they fell madly and hopelessly in love. Loving the other became like breathing, so easy and something they couldn’t live with out it.” Lexa divulged.

Clarke was so close she could feel Lexa’s breath against her skin. Her heart was beating so hard in her chest she felt like she was going to explode. 

Clarke wanted to leave; she knew she should but instead she managed to get out “How did their story end.” Clarke couldn’t help but let her gaze drop towards Lexa’s lips, and back up again into the eyes she could so easily get lost in.

“Take it, read it whilst you are here.” Lexa offered, taking another small step offering her the book. Not that she could get much closer without her being on top of Clarke. Clarke accepted the outreached book. Her hand slightly grazing Lexa’s as she grasped the book. The touch alone, enough to send a rush through her.

Clarke looked back up at Lexa, her eyes had slightly changed, they looked darker, full of want. Clarke could feel the wetness growing between her legs. 

Clarke coughed trying to clear her thoughts and stood back. “I was looking for Aria, I thought this was her room.” 

Clarke could see the change in lexa’s features as the words left her lips. Clarke thought for a second it was a flash of hurt, but the lighting was dim and Lexa’s usual facade was back up. “Her room is next door,” pointing to the right towards her bed. Clarke must had come one too far. 

“I have not long left her before you came in. She should still be awake.” Lexa informed her, in a formal manner.

Clarke nodded not sure what else to say and slowly headed towards the door. Apart of her not wanting to leave, to be in this moment where she blocked out the past and was just here. But she knew it wasn’t that simple.

“Clarke” Lexa said, clicking the K as she always did, never failing to make her heart flutter at hearing her name on lexa’s lips. Clarke stopped in her path to the door. Not trusting herself to turn around to look at her. 

“About the mountain.” Lexa stopped. “I made a decision that was best for my people. But I know you Clarke, what you did, it will haunt you and for that I will never forgive myself. If I could...”

“Don’t” Clarke stopped her. A tear running down her cheek now.

Clarke let out a shaky breath and left, quickly closing the door behind her. She quickly went to the room next door, again not bothering to knock. She looked up meeting Arias eyes as she entered. Aria quickly picked herself up onto her elbows from where she rested in bed. 

Clarke couldn’t hold it in anymore and leant back against the door and began to burst out crying. Several minutes past and she managed to calm herself. She had imagined Lexa’s apology in her head many times over the past few months, but she wasn’t ready, she wasn’t ready to hear it. It brought everything back from that day at the mountain, from Lexa turning her back on her and what choices she had to make. Every day she had felt it a little less, now it all came rushing back in one go, all the pain, the hurt, the moment she had realised what was happening and how she felt everything crumbling away. 

She managed to bring herself to look at Aria, she was glad Aria gave her this moment, but when her gaze met Arias, she could see the sadness Aria felt for her. Aria nodded her head to the other side of her bed, and Clarke picked herself up enough to get in. Clarke sunk into Aria, and let her hold her whilst she continued to cry.


	20. Chapter Twenty

Chapter 20

Clarke must have exhausted herself from crying and at some point, fallen asleep in Arias arms. She woke to a knock on the door. It took Clarke a moment to bring herself out of her sleep. She soon realised she was still entangled in Arias arms. Clarke opened her eyes and pushed up onto one of her elbows, from where she was lay against Arias chest. Her movement must have woken Aria as her eyes fluttered open. 

In Clarkes sleepy haze she had forgotten about the knock. She saw Aria lock eyes on to something past Clarke, and Clarke turned to see what she was looking at or in this case who. Lexa stood a few feet from the door, her jaw locked and she quickly diverted her gaze. 

“Apologises, I did not realise you still had company. Tallora should be up shortly with your breakfast Aria. Clarke, breakfast is ready in the dining room, for whenever you are ready, or of course you can eat with Aria if you prefer.” Her voice sounded slightly cold, but not her normal commanding calm voice, Clarke was used to. 

Lexa was gone before Aria or Clarke could get a word out. Clarke stood up and put her boots on, from where she had managed to kick them off when she got in last night and headed over to near the closed door and bent down to pick up the book she had dropped. 

“What’s that?” Aria asked from an upright position in her bed.

“Romeo and Juliette,” Clarke answered, running a hand over the worn cover. 

Aria rolled her eyes, “Lexa’s such a sap,”

Before Clarke could ask what, she meant, there was a light knock at the door, and a girl no older than fourteen came in with a tray of food and a big grin on her face.

“Tallora” Aria squealed. Tallora practically danced over to Aria, trying not to spill anything. 

“I’ve missed you” the girl said as she placed the tray beside Aria and leant over for a hug. “Tell, me everything, it is so boring here, I heard you nearly got eaten by a bear, then got stolen by some princess, is she cute, did you kill the bear, how’s Noah and your parents, are they still coming next week?” The girl barely breathed between words. She was sat on the bed next to Aria, she had long, light red hair and light skin with lots of freckles. 

Aria just chuckled, as she reached for a sip of the orange juice. “Breath Tallora, it was a panther not a bear, the princess didn’t kidnap me, she saved me and is a good friend I was hunting with, yes she’s cute, she also happens to stood behind you” the girl turned and gave Clarke an embarrassed smile. “I sent word last night that I was here and that I hoped they were still coming as planned, so they should still be.”

That’s when it dawned on Clarke, their annual trip to Polis, was not just some trip, to the outskirts of the city, it was here, to see Lexa, in the room next door. Clarkes stomach turned at the thought of how close Aria and Lexa must be. But Aria made it clear she had been interested in that boy back at the party, so that must mean her and Lexa’s relationship was a thing of the past, but it was clear they still cared a lot about each other, she could see the hurt on Lexa’s face when she saw them together only moments ago. 

Clarke knew it was petty, but part of her was still pissed at Lexa for everything, so a part of her was ok that Lexa was a bit upset.

“Earth to Clarke” she heard Arias voice and looked over at her seeing both her and Tallora looking at her expectantly. 

“Tallora has worked in the tower since she was little, her mum is the head cook in the kitchen. If you want the good food, Tallora has smuggled me vast amounts of chocolate.”

“Chocolate!” Clarke said, suddenly very interested. “We had dark chocolate on the Ark, but it had this weird ingredient in to be longer lasting.” Clarke said pulling a sour face, imagining tasting it.

“You’ve never had chocolate!” Tallora said dazed at the thought. 

“We didn’t have a lot of things on the Ark, only what we could create up there.” Tallora absent minded looked up at the ceiling, thinking of how crazy it is there were people up there.

As the moment settled, Clarke stomach rumbled loud to break the silence. “I better go find where this breakfast is.” 

“I can show you the way, I’m heading back that way.” Tallora offered.

“Thank you” Clarke said.

“Clarke, grab something from my wardrobe before, you head down.” Aria offered. 

Clarke was in her simple long-sleeved top, her leather jacket still in her room down stairs. She took Aria up on her offer and pulled out, a black vest top, and black knitted jumper, that had some holes in. Aria pointed to a room that joined to hers that held a bath, a sink and to Clarkes surprise, an actual working toilet and went and got changed.

She left the book on Arias table and promised she would talk later. She could see the concern in Arias eyes, and knew she would have to explain at least part of last night. Clarke had never cried in front of Aria, so for Clarke to break down like that, must have Aria worried. Aria had not asked what was wrong last night, she just let her cry and Clarke was grateful for that, it was what she needed.

Monty, Jasper, Octavia and Lincoln were already around a large table with Lexa at the head. Lexa had a small smile on her face, secretly listening to Monty and Jasper. “Raven could totally beat Clarke in a fight” Jasper said.

“pfft yeah right, Clarkes a total warrior badass now.” Monty responded, not noticing Clarke had entered, and was now stood there listening with her arm crossed. 

“Yeah, but Raven could totally make Clarke go boom” Jasper argued, stealing a grape of Monty’s plate from across the table. 

“Hey, there is a whole bowl of grapes right there!” Monty said leaning over to reach for it back.

“Fine have it back” Jasper offered throwing it back and hitting Monty on the forehead. 

Monty and Jasper looked at each other in a long moment of silence, then suddenly both dived for a handful of grapes out of the bowl, but before either of them could launch one. Clarke coughed. All eyes darted to her, but Lexa remained looking at her food, still smiling at what she could hear. She knew Clarke had been stood there the whole time. 

Monty and Jasper dropped the grapes on their plates and sat down, pretending like it never happened. Clarke had a flash back to the dining room in mount weather with Jasper and Monty, but then soon the memory turned to Jasper holding Maya in his arms.

Clarke swallowed down the pain like she had got good at doing, and went to take the empty seat next to Jasper, which was to Lexa’s left. Clearly none of her friends had wanted to sit too close to the commander. Though it shocked Clarke that Monty and Jasper could act like that in front of the leader of the grounders, but then again, Clarke envied how Monty and Jasper were always in their own little world.

Clarke tried to eat what she could but she had lost her appetite. She could feel Lexa looking at her the whole time, but she didn’t dare look in Lexa’s direction. She thought it was best for everyone if she kept her distance. Only talking to Lexa on official matters. 

Clarke was trying to eat a bit more cheese, when Octavia said, “Thank you for your hospitality Commander and I never had the chance to thank you for removing the kill order on Lincoln.” Lincoln sat awkwardly next to Octavia, clearly uncomfortable with the topic. 

“Lincoln chose his heart over his head.” Lexa stated. Clarke nearly choked on her food hearing it. “I envy that” Lexa admitted. Clarke had never heard her be so vulnerable outside of her tent. “I could not punish him for fighting for the one he loved, I hope all of my warriors would do the same.” 

The room was left silent. 

“I appreciate you returning Aria home safe.” The word ‘home’ made Clarkes stomach drop. “But I assume she was not the only reason you came.” Clarke wanted to say that it wasn’t the reason at all, but this was the time to be diplomatic. 

“No, it is not,” Clarke said, all eyes going to her. “As you are aware commander, our people are being captured and killed at the hands of a Clan in your alliance. I was hoping we could come to some sort of solution.”

“If the Ice Nation, were targeting other Clans, then they would be breaking the alliance agreement. Skaikru are not part of the alliance, they are breaking no rule.” Lexa brushed it off so stoically it was making Clarkes blood begin to boil. 

“And if they captured me next?” Clarke threw at Lexa, regretting the words as they left her lips. But, she hated seeing Lexa so emotionless. Part of Clarke wasn’t sure if Lexa even cared, but she had to try, she couldn’t go back without trying everything, she couldn’t fail her people.

Clarke could see Lexa’s jaw tense at the thought. “You are part of Skaikru Clarke, so again, they would be breaking no rules.” Clarke held back the hurt from showing on her face, and the embarrassment, choosing to stare at her food, rather than those around the table.

Lexa took a sip of her drink. “However, we could try and change that.” Lexa suggested. This pulled Clarkes interest. I have a meeting here with the twelve Clans in 10 days, I will put forwarded Skaikru joining the coalition. You can become my people and under my protection.” Lexa stood as she finished.

“I am afraid I have some business to take care off for the rest of the day, please let someone know when you would like lunch and I will see you again at dinner.” Before Clarke could even respond to the offer, Lexa was out of the door.

“Well, I guess that solves that.” Jasper said with a mouth full of food.

“Do you think our people would accept it?” Octavia asked.

Clarke thought on it for a moment. “Our people have worked well alongside Ton DC; I think our people would choose not to live in fear.”

Monty nodded in agreement.


	21. Chapter Twenty One

Clarke spent the rest of the morning exploring more of Polis with the others. Lincoln, took them around the markets. It didn’t take long for Clarke to realise what Lexa had meant by ‘it will change the way you think of us.’ Here was like another world, full of smells and laughter. Everyone was so welcoming, most just stared for a moment and then carried on with their day. But Clarke was surprised by how many people had stopped to thank her for what she did. She overheard people often being grateful for the person they called Wanheda, back at the village, but for people to show it directly to her, couldn’t help but warm her heart. 

They got some delicious food from one of the stalls for lunch, and Clarke took a little extra for Aria. Clarke enjoyed those few hours, getting lost in the crowds, taking everything in. This was not how she pictured Polis and she was very pleasantly surprised. 

Clarke knocked slightly as she pushed open the door to Arias room, she hadn’t spent much time on her own apart from fetching her jacket earlier that morning.

Clarke saw the untouched plate that had some meat and cheese on and called out “Aria are you in here.” 

A moment later Aria, was hobbling out of her washroom. “In here she called.” Aria looked loads better and was starting to walk with little pain now. Clarke smiled at her “Brought you something tastier than your plate.” Clarke said offering out her arm, where she held two skewers, full of spicy meats. 

“mmmm god I love you.” Aria said taking the food and diving right in as she sat on the edge of her bed.

“How are you feeling, I thought I could check your stitches when you have finished eating. Some might be ready to come out in the next day or two.”

“Yeah, I am feeling much better compared to yesterday.” Aria answered with a mouth full of food.

“Good, we will try get you walking a bit more later,” Clarke said as she sat down beside Aria and flopped back.

“So, what did you think of the city?” Aria asked, with a smile, already knowing the answer from the smile Clarke has had since she entered.

“Amazing, how could you ever leave this place?” Clarke asked staring up at the ceiling. 

Aria laughed and waited to finished her food, then answered. “The city life isn’t really for me; I’d rather have the peace of the village any day. But I suck it up for the time that I visit to see Lexa.”

“I like the noise.” Clarke said as she sat up and looked at Aria. “The Ark was always so quiet apart from this constant hum of the engine, to hear voices and laughter and music and song, it just feels so magical.” Clarke said thinking back to her day.

“Are you feeling better then, after last night?” Aria asked hesitantly. 

Clarke wasn’t sure what to say, or how to explain what happened. So she decided to tell Aria a half truth. “Sorry about last night, it was just a long day, and seeing Lexa brought back memories of the mountain.” 

Aria nodded in understanding. Clarke wanted to ask Aria more about her and Lexa, but it didn’t feel like the right time. Instead, she told Aria about Lexa’s plan for them to join the coalition, Aria seemed to think it would work. Then they spent the rest of the afternoon, talking about anything and nothing, like they were back on the farm. Aria tried walking some more around the room, and they stood for a while looking out of the balcony over Polis, as Aria told her about the place and the history. Dinner time came, and Clarke decided to have it with Aria, she felt bad she was still not well enough to go to dinner and didn’t want her eating on her own. But they decided Aria would try make it for breakfast tomorrow. Clarke was glad she didn’t have to see Lexa, she couldn’t think straight around her, Lexa was like magnet that pulled Clarke in and made Clarke forget everything.

Aria gave Clarke an oversized top to sleep in and some comfy leggings. It was kind of unspoken Clarke was going to be staying in Arias room again tonight. Whilst Aria was bathing, Clarke opened her book and began to read Romeo and Juliette. Clarke had just checked over Aria stitches and they were healing well. A Long soak would do her good. Clarke was a few chapters in when Aria returned, her hair still wet, making her top damp. 

Clarke stayed up a while longer after Aria had fallen to sleep, using a lantern to read her book. Clarke was finding hard to put the book down, but soon her eyes grew too heavy, and closed the book and joined Aria in bed. 

......

The next day, Aria managed to join them for breakfast but there was no Lexa. Her absence did not go unnoticed by Clarke, nor Aria by the seams of it. 

Aria leaned over to Clarke where she sat next to her and asked “did Lexa seem ok the last time you saw her. It’s weird she hasn’t been to see me since we first arrived.” Aria’s eyes brows creased with worry. 

“Yes, she seemed fine to me, but I haven’t seen her since breakfast yesterday morning,” Clarke replied.

Aria went back to her food, looking deep in thought. 

The rest of the conversation over breakfast was light. It sounded like Octavia and Lincoln had spent the rest of the day sparring, and Monty and Jasper had found somewhere in the city where they had parts of the old world.

After breakfast Clarke had helped Aria back to her room, Aria had insisted she was fine, but it was clear to Clarke the breakfast took its toll on her.

When they got back to the room, Clarke tried Raven again on the radio, every time she tried, she still couldn’t get hold of her. Finally, Raven responded back. It was good to hear Ravens voice and that everyone was ok, and there had not been any further attacks. The most curious part of the conversation was when Aria had joined in and somehow ended up taking the radio and wandering around the room as she spoke to Raven. 

Clarke smiled at how happy her friends sounded and decided to go for a walk to give them space. She grabbed the paper and pencil Aria had given her earlier that morning and headed to the lift.

Clarke found herself in the tower gardens, she was glad she could finally see it in daylight. The sun was shining high, but Clarke could barely feel any warmth from it, but luckily, she had her jacket to keep her warm. 

The gardens were beautiful, but she imagined this was nothing compared to what they would look like in spring. Most of the trees were bare, but Clarke could still here some birds tweeting and the fresh air felt amazing. She came to a bench that had it’s back to the tower, a hedge ran behind it, blocking its view from the bottom of the tower. She took a seat and a tall old tree took Clarkes attention, standing in perfect eye sight in front of her. It still had an odd, few leaves, but it was mainly bare. 

Clarke began to sketch the tree, when she heard footsteps crunching on the leaves that lay on the ground. Clarke looked up from where she was working on her drawing, to see Lexa rounding the corner, under one of the arch ways that lead to the area that housed the old tree. 

Lexa stopped her stride when she noticed she was no longer alone. Lexa took a few more steps towards Clarke but then stopped, keeping a distance between them. 

“I am sorry, I did not mean to disturb you Clarke. I just came out here to clean my mind.” Lexa told her. “I’ll leave you to your drawing.” Lexa began to turn, to leave the way she came, but before she could, she heard. “Wait.” Lexa froze in her step.

“This is a good place to clear your head.” Clarke offered scooting along on the bench slightly. Clarke had no idea what came over her. She should have just let Lexa leave, but she couldn’t help but enjoy being around her, even after everything.

Lexa seemed hesitant, but eventually dipped her head and sat beside Clarke. Clarke could feel Lexa looking over her shoulder, but she carried on with her drawing anyway.

A few minutes past and Lexa found the courage to say; “You’re an amazing artist Clark.”

“Thank you,” Clarke said as she paused momentarily then continued drawing.

“I hope that jacket is keeping you warm, it looks good on you.” Clarke blushed at Lexa’s words, grateful that her hair fell slightly, hiding her face as she looked down at her sketch.

“You weren’t at breakfast.” Clarke stated as she continued drawing.

“You were not at dinner.” Lexa responded.

Clarke thought that was the only response she was going to get until; “I wasn’t able to sleep much, so I wasn’t in the best of moods. I had breakfast in my room.”

Clarke didn’t respond but continued writing. It was hard to just think of Lexa as a regular person sometimes.

“Clarke” lexa said nervously, putting her hand on Clarkes arm to stop her drawing and get her attention. Clarke looked at where Lexa’s hand rested on her arm, her thumb slightly rubbing across her jacket sleeve. Clarke stilled and then looked up to meet Lexa’s eyes. Lexa was so close, her eyes always held so much emotion; it broke Clarkes heart looking into them and seeing pain. 

“I lied yesterday. If the Ice Nation took you.” Lexa swallowed slightly, her voice shaking a little. “I can’t even bare to think about it. If it happened to me again.” Lexa paused a moment. Clarke knew she was talking about Costia. She could see the tears she was trying to hold back forming in her eyes. When Lexa managed to gather her words again to speak, she managed to say “I do care Clarke.” 

Clarke felt emotion flood through her, she didn’t realise how much she needed to hear that Lexa cared until the words had left her lips. She twisted to angle herself more into Lexa, resulting in dropping her sketch, onto the ground.

“Lexa” was all Clarke could get out; her mouth still slightly open wanting to say more. 

“I know you hate me for what happened at the mountain. But..”

“I don’t hate you.” Clarke couldn’t help but say. There was a moment pause. “I thought I did, it was easier to blame you for what happened at the mountain, than to blame myself. I made the decision, not you. And I would make the same one again, I need to accept that. You put your people first, same as me.” Clarke seemed to be telling herself more than Lexa, not realising she believed what she was saying until the words were out.

Clarke realised Lexa’s hand was still on her arm. She didn’t dare move it slightly in case she lost Lexa’s contact. She saw Lexa look down at her lips and Lexa slowly moved her other hand to rub her thumb across, Clarkes cheek, catching a tear. Clarke leaned into the palm of Lexa’s hand and closed her eyes, taking in this moment. When she opened her eyes, she saw Lexa’s own tear escape down her cheek. Clarke followed it down and saw where it caught on the corner of Lexa’s mouth. She wanted to taste the salt, to feel Lexa’s lips against her own again. She felt herself begin to lean in and she saw Lexa’s eyes close in anticipation. But before their lips could touch, Clarke pulled away. She saw the hurt flash across Lexa’s face. And felt her own pain. But she couldn’t help but think about Aria, she knew what her and Lexa had was a thing of the past, but she didn’t want to do anything that would affect their friendship. 

Clarke opened her mouth to try and give Lexa an explanation but all that would come out, is “I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok, it’s Aria isn’t it.”

Before Clarke could respond, Lexa had stood up, picking Clarkes drawing up for her and placing it where she had just been sat, then took a step back, distancing herself from Clarke.

“It really is a lovely drawing Clarke; I hope one day you may see it in bloom.” With that, Lexa offered Clarke a warm smiled and headed back towards the tower. 

Clarke could do nothing but sit there and run through what just happened a thousand times in her head. But her hand soon became too cold and she decided to head back inside.

Clarke thought it would be best to go to her own room, she took her shoes off and dived straight into the furs to get warm, she pulled one over her head, so she was in darkness. She felt she was fourteen again, and was at the school dance, getting butterflies, when the girl in the year above flirted with her, but she knew Wells had been seriously crushing on her for months, so she didn’t do anything. Clarke groaned to herself, but then heard the door go.

She whipped the blanket down, leaving her hair a mess, but didn’t bother pulling herself up. 

“Who is it” she said starring at the ceiling sounding defeated and broken.

“What happened to you” Aria said as her face appeared blocking Clarke view of the ceiling. 

Clarke sat up resting on her elbows. “Please don’t tell me you used the stairs, you are supposed to be resting!”

“Chill Clarke, I took the lift.” Aria said as she slid on the bed next to Clarke, making Clarke budge up. 

“So, the black metal thing, you used to hear Ravens voice...”

“Yes...” Clarke answered with concern.

“Yeah, that stopped working, there was this flashing red light, then it started beeping, then Ravens voice was going in and out then it just stopped.”

Clarke flumped back against the pillow, and covered her hands with her face. “Aria. How long exactly were you talking to Raven?” Clarke asked suspiciously.

“Erm until a few minutes ago” Aria said with a shrug.

Clarke groaned again, “Aria the batteries dead.” 

“I have no idea what that means.” Aria told her.

“It means we now have no way of talking to camp.”

“Oh.” Aria said looking guilty. “Sorry.”

“It’s not your fault you didn’t know, Raven did though.” Clarke said letting out a deep sigh, dropping her arms to her sides.

Aria moved so she was lay next to Clarke. 

Clarke went silent, she felt awkward. Should she tell Aria about the near kiss?

“Hey are you ok?” Aria asked, twisting to face Clarke leaning on one arm.

Clarke, didn’t answer, she didn’t know how to answer.

“It’s Lexa isn’t it?” Aria said.

Clarkes stomach twisted at Aria’s words and she sat up. “What do you mean?”

“I know it must be hard to be here, to have to ask Lexa for help, I know your still hurting. But Lexa is a good person Clarke, the best actually. All she ever wanted was to help people, she used to run around the village when we were little, doing anything she could to help, or to bring a smile to someone. Don’t get me wrong my sister isn’t perfect, but she is the most selfless person I know. She will always put her people first, even if it means sacrificing her own chance at happiness. She would live in misery if it meant others around her were happy.” 

Aria carried on talking. But Clarke couldn’t hear anything. Sister? Did Aria just say sister? Clarke felt like a complete fool. Everything made so much sense now. Why Aria was so sure the Ice Nation wouldn’t harm her. The way Lexa and Aria acted around each other. Their annual trip. 

“Clarke? Clarke? Are you evening listening to me?” Aria said slightly annoyed.

“No, I mean yes...errr” Clarke said putting the blanket back over her head in embarrassment. 

“Clarke will you please just tell me what is going on?” Aria asked in confusion.

Clarke muttered something under the covers, but Aria couldn’t quite hear it.

Clarke reconsidered admitting to not knowing Lexa was her sister, Aria would never let her live it down.  
Clarke remove the covers and said “sorry, I was outside, and I got so cold my fingers were going to fall off, that’s why I am in bed. This last week has just been so over whelming, I was just having a moment.” Clarke managed to lie through her teeth. 

Aria looked at her with one eye brow raised, sceptically. “mmhmm ok Clarke, whatever you say.”

A moment longer and Aria changed the subject. “Have you seen Lexa? She still hasn’t been to see me, I know usually she clears her schedule for when we are here, but she can’t be this busy.” Aria said looking a little hurt.

“I bumped into her when I was outside on my walk.” Clarke admitted.

This got Aria’s attention. “You didn’t kill her did you?” Aria asked half joking and half serious.

This made Clarke chuckle, “no, we just talked.”

“Talked?” 

“Yes, just talked.”

“About what?”

“things”

“Things?”

“yes things” Clarke said, starting to get flustered with all the questions.

“And now you’re up here moping in bed.” Aria said with a smirk.

“I’m not moping,” Clarke quickly defended.

“mmhmmm. Right, of course your not.” Aria said whilst standing up. “Well, I am going to go try find my little sister and go and ask her what has gotten all her armour in a twist. It’s not like she hasn’t seen me for months and that I didn’t just have a near death experience.” Aria said exaggerating.

Clarke wanted to stop her, but she knew it would just raise more questions from Aria, and she couldn’t take another interrogation right now.


	22. Chapter Twenty Two

Chapter 22

Not long after Aria left; Clarke drifted off the sleep; her sleep must finally be catching up with her after the past week.

When Clarke awoke from her nap, she heard voices from Aria’s room above her. Clarke let the curiousness in her get the best of her and she quickly, slid her boots on and ran up the stairs.

As she neared Arias room the voices got clearer and louder, Aria’s door had been slightly left open. 

“You wanted to see me Aria and now I am here, I don’t know why you are so upset.”

“You can’t be serious. I haven’t even seen you since the night I got here. Somethings up, you need to tell me.”

“I’ve been busy.” 

“don’t lie to me Lexa, I know you, I know when somethings wrong. Just ...” Lexa interrupted her.

“You knew how I felt about her!” Lexa yelled at Aria. Her usual decorum crumbling. 

Aria was taken back a little, confused. “Who Clarke?” Aria asked.

“Yes Clarke! You knew how I felt.” Lexa’s voice broke a little.

“Lexa, I don’t know what you think is going on, but me and Clarke are just friends, I promised you I would keep her safe and I did, that’s all, she is like family to me now.”

Lexa stood breathing heavy, blinking, trying to take in what Aria had just said.

“I don’t understand, I thought... I saw you yesterday morning.” Lexa said confused.

Aria sat down on the edge of her bed, not being able to stand much longer. “Lex, Clarke was just upset, and I was comforting her and she fell asleep. I promise you, there is nothing going on between me and Clarke. Is this why you have been so distant with me?” Aria asked, in a gentle voice, understanding why Lexa had been avoiding her.

Lexa looked down at the ground, trying to make sense of it all and slightly ashamed, she had hurt her sister in all this. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you, it’s just when I saw you...” Lexa’s train of thought drifted. “But today, in the garden” Lexa seemed to talk more to herself now. 

Silence fell on the room.

Clarke began to feel guilty for listening and headed back down stairs. Clarke didn’t know what to think, she knew Lexa told her she cared, but she still wasn’t able to quite believe what she heard, not after everything. She was even more surprised she told Aria, and that Aria had known what had happened between her and Lexa this whole time but didn’t say anything. But then again that was a very Aria thing to do. 

She felt bad she had caused a rift between Aria and Lexa, but she also couldn’t help but regret not pulling Lexa in and letting herself taste her again earlier. God how much she craved her. Maybe this was for the best, she needed to keep focused on her people, she wouldn’t stop until they were safe. 

Clarke was just about to reach her door, when Monty and Jasper came out of their room. “Hey Clarke, we met this grounder earlier and they showed us this really cool Tavern that’s not too far. Fancy a drink” Jasper asked.

A Drink sounded perfect to Clarke right now. She had missed lunch, but there was no way she could eat right now, her stomach was in knots. Clarke’s grin was enough of an answer for Monty and Jasper and Clarke laughed at the woohoo, she heard in response. 

It was growing dark now as they left the tower. It wasn’t long before they reached a long shack type place. There were lots of voices spilling out of it, every time the door swung open. It sounded busy inside. Clarke was excited and headed in without hesitation. She needed something to help her forget everything that was going on, just for a night. 

All eyes got drawn to them as the door swung close behind them, and the place got eerie silent, for a moment Clarke wasn’t sure if they should leave and wished she had brought her sword. But her fear was short lived. When the tavern roared back to life, in cheers and someone shouting Jasper and Monty’s name in greeting and soon everyone was back to their conversations. Jasper spoke to a tall, older man, whilst, Monty and Clarke went to the bar and found seats and ordered them all a pint. Jasper soon joined and all three were on to their seconds, laughing and having fun in no time. It was just what Clarke needed.   
.....  
An hour or two had passed, and Clarke was deep in conversation with the bar tender named Roslyn. “Hey Clarke, we are starved, going to head back to the castle.” Jasper said slurring, with Monty slightly leaning on him, to prop himself up. 

“You guys go, I’ll be back soon.” Clarke waved them off and they stumbled out laughing at something one of them had said.

“Castle?” the bartender asked with an amused smiled.

“They meant the commanders tower.”

“The Commander, really, where did you say you were from again?” Roslyn asked leaning over the counter. 

“I didn’t” Clarke responded with a smirk. This raised the other girls’ eyebrows in intrigue. Clarke quickly changed the subject onto Roslyn, Clarke learnt she was from floukru and came here for the city life.

Monty had given her some coins that Jasper and him had somehow accumulated, but only had enough for one or two more. She had lost count of how many she had already had, but was enjoying escaping her life for a night. 

Another hour must have passed, and the tavern was getting quieter. There were a few drunk grounders at the other end of the bar, a couple of people in the booths and then Clarke noticed a cloaked figure in the corner. 

Before Clarke could linger longer on the figure, Roslyn was back with another drink for her.

Roslyn touched Clarkes arm, rubbing her thumb over it. It reminded Clarke of Lexa and unlike Lexa, it did not have the same effect on Clarke. She longed for Lexa’s slender fingers, for the warmth of her touch, how even a graze of contact from Lexa, she could feel in every part of her. With Roslyn, she felt nothing. 

Roslyn reached her body over and whispered “My rooms just in the back if you don’t want to walk back to your castle.” Roslyn pulled back with a seductive look. Clarke thought how easy it would be to fall into bed with her. 

“I’m sorry Roslyn you are lovely, hell your fucking gorgeous. It’s just...” Clarke paused taking a few more sips of her drink, at the thought of those green eyes.

“I’m not the one you want.” Roslyn answered for her. Clarke didn’t say anything and decided to chug the rest of her drink. “It’s ok, if you change your mind you know where to find me,” she said with a wink and headed off to clear some cups.

Clarke downed her drink quickly and then stood up, ready to head for the door. She had to gather her balance; she didn’t realise how much she has had to drink until she stood up. The Tavern spun slightly, and she hoped she would feel better when the fresh air hit her. 

“Wow their sky girl, looks like someone’s had a little more than they can handle.” Said a young guy beginning to standing from the other end of the bar and slowly approach Clarke. “Speaking off too much to handle, have you lay with a real man from the ground. I could get you seeing your stars.” The man said laughing back to his friends. Clarke could smell the alcohol on his breath as he went to whisper in her ear. Clarke felt dizzy and closed her eyes. 

But all she heard was a grunt from the man, and his breath disappearing. Her eyes flew open as she heard a smash of a table. The man lay unconscious, against a broken table, that was now split in two from the force. Clarke tried to take a step forward, but lost her footing and fell. But she didn’t hit the floor. Instead, she felt strong arms holding her. Clarke panicked for a moment, thinking it was the grounder, but then she heard it. Her voice. “Don’t worry Clarke, I have you, you are safe.”

Clarkes, body instantly relaxed into her and she draped her arms around her neck, holding her tightly. She felt the cool night air hit her. She could smell, her favourite smell of forest mixed with honey. She nuzzled her nose closer into Lexa’s neck, to take in a deeper scent of her. She wanted so badly to taste her, and before she knew what she was doing. She ran her tongue along Lexa’s pulse point, and sucked hard against where she could feel Lexa’s pulse beating. She tasted better than Clarke could have imagined, and Clarke wanted more. She heard a moan escaped Lexa’s mouth and the motion of walking stopped. Lexa’s breathing laboured and Clarke trailed her kisses along her jaw line, until she nipped at her ear, kissing just behind it, adding a swish of her tongue. With her lips and warm breath brushing against Lexa’s ear, she whispered, “I have never wanted anything more than I’ve ever wanted you Lexa kom trikru, I want your heart, your sole, your body.” Clarke paused for affect. She knew what she was doing to her, she could feel Lexa trembling. “and I want to give you all of me. Take me Lexa.” 

After a moment, Lexa slid Clarke into a standing position, but kept her hands holding Clarke up at the waist. Clarke could see Lexa’s eyes glisten in the moonlight. Lexa moved a piece of hair out of Clarkes face and tucked it behind her ear. “Clarke,” she breathed. 

“Yes,” Clarke responded, looking at Lexa’s lips in anticipation.

“Can you walk?” That was not where Clarke thought this was going, and scrunched her eyebrows up in confusion. 

Clarke felt hurt in her drunk state and felt angry. “Yes, I can walk!” Clarke responded annoyed. “I’m not a child, I am perfectly fine on my own.” Clarke said as she started to stagger away. Clarke soon felt the world spinning out of existence and Lexa’s warmth against her again.


	23. Chapter Twenty Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the update delay, but I have a few more chapters heading your way. Sorry for any spelling or grammar, it was either post it as it is, or in a few weeks when I could bring myself to read over them again! 
> 
> Can't wait to keep hearing all your feedback!

Chapter 23

Clarke woke with a sharp pain in her head, and her mouth so dry, it was like she had swallowed sand. Her eyes flicked open and it took a moment for her eyes to adjust to the light. 

Clarke soon noticed her head was slowly rising and falling. The memory of the night before was slowly coming back to her, at first, she thought she was lay on the woman from the bar, that’s when she remembered the hooded figure. Clarke chastise herself for drinking so much. She didn’t know what to do, if she moves and wakes Lexa then that’s going to be awkward, but then if she just stays here, Lexa will find her like this anyway. Clarkes head lay against Lexa lower stomach and had somehow ended up like a koala hanging off her in the night. Clarke soon registered where her hand lay, slightly under the hem of Lexa’s top, she could feel the heat off Lexa’s skin against her finger tips and she so desperately wanted to run her fingers across her stomach muscles. Clarke could not believe she was in this situation. 

“You think too loud Clarke.” Lexa said simply. Clarke’s cheeks flushed red and she just wanted to run and hide.

Clarke didn’t know what to say, she wished she had a better memory of when they got back to the tower. She noticed they were fully clothed and, in her room, but she couldn’t remember how she got here. 

Clarke did the only thing she could think of, she slowly removed her hand from under Lexa top, instantly missing the smooth feeling of Lexa’s skin and lifted herself of Lexa, rolling straight out of bed to get up and head for the door. But Clarke misjudged the amount of room she had and landed flat, face down on the floor. 

“Clarke! Are you ok?” Lexa said concerned, instantly rushing to Clarkes side of the bed, peering over to see if she was ok.

“Just fine” Clarke groaned. Could this get any worse she thought to herself. Still flat against the floor.

“Hey Clarke, what happened to you last night, finally decided to be a big girl and sleep alone?” Clarke heard Aria say entering her room.

Clarke just groaned into the floor again, and rolled onto her back, the cold of the floor sent a shiver down her spine. She let a sigh out in defeat, staring at the ceiling. Maybe she could just lie here and pretend this wasn’t happening. 

“Well, well, well, what do we have here.” Aria said amused.

Clarke pushed herself up to stand, going slightly dizzy, she put an arm out for balance and her other hand went to her head, trying to comfort her headache.

“Is there any water.” Was all she could say, her throat was so dry she couldn’t think of anything else.

“Damn and I thought Monty and Jasper looked rough at Breakfast” Aria said still grinning by the door.

“Here” she heard Lexa say, passing her a glass at her side.

Clarke practically downed the whole thing.

“I wish I had been there, if you were drinking like that last night.” She said with a laugh, as Clarke was still drinking.

“Remember that time you hooked up with the baker’s boy and his girlfriend went crazy.” Aria said still laughing. “I really need to see drunk Clarke more often, I miss her, I can’t believe I missed out on all the fun.” Aria rambled on, at this point she may as well had been talking to herself, as the moment Aria mentioned the baker’s boy, Clarkes eyes flew to Lexa’s in panic, Clarke wanted to kill Aria. Lexa glanced at Clarke when she felt her eyes on her, and they had an awkward look. And Lexa quickly went back to staring at the floor uncomfortably.

Clarke felt light headed and slowly placed herself against the edge of her bed. Clarke missed what Aria said but it got Lexa smiling and letting out a slight laugh. That got Clarkes attention she loved Lexa’s smile but god her laugh made her go weak, it was a good thing she was already sat down. The sound of Lexa’s laugh was something she wanted to hear again and as often as possible. 

The laughter soon died out and a silence fell on the room.

“If you will excuse me there are matters, I need to attend to.” Lexa said formally, her commander facade back on.

Clarke immediately felt bad for her part in Lexa being behind in her day.

“I am sorry, why didn’t you wake me.” Clarke said to Lexa as she was on her way to the door. Aria had clearly already had breakfast so the day must be getting late. “I am sorry you missed breakfast.” Clarke said feeling guilty. 

Lexa turned and glanced at Aria then back to Clarke and allowed a moment to pass before she breathed; “You looked peaceful” and then disappeared out of the door.

Aria looked like she was trying to hold back a knowing smirk and went to go sit on Clarkes bed.

“Please tell me this means you have forgiven her; she’s been grumpy since the mountain. Tallora says, there is a bet going on in the kitchen of how long Lexa can go without smiling.” 

Clarke went over to the jug and poured herself another glass of water, guzzling that down as well before she answered, turning back to face where Aria was looking at her from the bed. 

Clarke went and sat beside her looking at the half empty glass in her hands. “I think I forgave her along time ago, I just didn’t want to admit it. I killed children Aria, kids, there were 50 of my people in that mountain and hundreds of theirs, probably more than 50 being kids. I could have let my people die; more lives would have been saved.” Clarke took a deep breath, to help her continue. “All Lexa did was make a choice that spared her people their lives. Hundreds of her soldiers would have probably died in there, many just died getting to the door. And hundreds of the mountain men would have died as well. I wouldn’t have sacrificed my people for less than 50 strangers, not when all of my people’s lives could be spared. It is selfish of me to wish the people of the mountain had died by Lexa’s command instead of my own.”

The room fell silent with Clarkes words.

“She does too you know.” Aria said softly 

Clarke looked beside her at Aria confused. 

“Wish that she could take the blood from your hands, the weight of your shoulders, the pain that you now carry.”

All Clarke could do was nod and look back down at her hands. She knew what Aria said was true. She could see the guilt in Lexa’s eyes when she looked at her, thinking she blamed her for the pain she now carried. The wishful sparkle wishing she could take it from Clarke. But Clarke didn’t blame her and she no longer blamed herself. Cage forced her hand no one else. Life is made of choices, good or bad, they were made, the only choice left is to move forward. Aria had told her this many times in various ways, but she wasn’t ready to listen. She felt like she needed to keep punishing herself with the pain, but she didn’t want that anymore, she knew there was going to be more tough choices ahead and she needed to be ready.

“So, what happened last night,” Aria said lightly nudging Clarkes shoulder.

The mood changing, and Clarke fell back on the bed with a grunt at the memory.

Clarke told Aria everything, from the moment they stepped in to the tavern, right up to her waking up on Lexa. It felt good to finally be able to talk to someone about Lexa. She left out the part where she had started going at her sisters’ neck like a horny teenager, but told her about everything else. 

“So, you like my little sister huh.” Aria said widening her shoulders a little, where she sat crossed legged on the bed. 

Clarke rolled her eyes, feeling her cheeks go hot at the comment.

“I never said that.” Clarke said in defence.

“Oh, come on Clarkey, I see the way you look at her, and the fact you turned down the gorgeous bartender, says a lot.” Aria said with a smirk and one eyebrow raised.

Clarkes cheeks flushed even redder. 

“I never said she was gorgeous.” Clarke defended. “Is this where you forbid me from seeing her.” Clarke said not giving her a straight answer.

“Oh no, you have been reading way too much Romeo and Juliet Clarke.” Aria said laughing. “She maybe my sister but she’s still the commander, she’s going to do as she pleases and from what I hear she wants to please you.” Aria said with a wink. 

Clarke shoved Aria at her comment, shaking her head, at how ridiculous she was being.

“Since we are getting everything out in the open, don’t think for a second I don’t know about that kiss.” Aria informed Clarke

“Which kiss?” Clarke let slip out.

“Which? How many kisses have you been giving my sister?” Aria said acting shocked. “The one before the mountain” Aria added. 

“What!” Clarke said a little too loudly that it hurt Aria’s ears. 

“Jeeze Clarke I am sat right next to you know.” Aria said covering her ears for effect.

“This whole time you knew?” Clarke asked bewildered. “Why didn’t you say anything?” 

“Yours and Lexa’s business is your own, and I got the feeling Lexa was the last person you wanted to talk about. I was scared to tell you she was my sister. I knew how hurt you were by her. I thought you might be annoyed and not want our friendship when you found out.” Aria said sounding vulnerable.

“Hey,” Clarke said, putting a hand on Aria’s shoulder. “Whatever happened or happens between me and Lexa, it will never change our relationship, you are my family Aria no matter who you are related to,” Clarke said ending in a grin.

Aria laughed and smiled back at Clarke gratefully. 

They talked a while longer but Clarke soon got hungry, and Aria insisted she was well enough to show her the kitchen.

The Kitchen was massive, and had the most amazing smell! Aria spoke to a few people and it wasn’t long before Clarke had many choices of food laid out in front of her. Clarke felt like she could eat a horse, so she dove in as soon as she could, enjoying all the different smells and taste. Clarke would never get over how good the food tasted on the ground, compared to the Ark. 

After eating, Clarke decided to have a bath and then fell, feeling fresh into her bed. She ran her hand over where Lexa had laid earlier that day, missing her warmth. She thought about going to find lexa, to talk to her about last night, she felt unsettled at how things were left this morning, especially since Clarke still couldn’t remember what happened after they got back to the tower. She also needed to apologise for her behaviour when Lexa was trying to help her. She couldn’t help but run her mind over the parts that she could remember from last night a thousand times, was Lexa annoyed with Clarke? Is that why she left so quick this morning? As much as she enjoyed waking up to Lexa, she needed to know how Lexa ended up in her bed? But before Clarke knew it, she was drifting off.


	24. Chapter Twenty Four

Chapter 24

It felt next to no time, when there was a loud, urgent bang on her door.

“Clarke, Clarke.” Aria said running into her room. 

Clarke jumped up, ready to run if the building was on fire.

“What?” Clarke asked slightly panicked.

“They’re here!” Aria said like Clarke would have a clue what she was talking about.

“Who.”

“Ma and Pa, word just got sent from the gate.” Aria told Clarke in excitement.

A huge smile spread across Clarke’s face at the news. “Let’s go!” She said grabbing her jacket and then Arias hand to pull her out of the door.

“We can’t go and meet them Clarke, Lexa is waiting for them in the throne room, we will wait for them there.” Aria told her taking the lead.

Clarke was slightly confused to why they couldn’t go and meet them as they arrived in Polis. But pushed that thought back and followed Aria, smiling at the thought of seeing them.

The doors opened to the throne room, and Lexa was dressed in her long black commander coat, but without her war paint, her hair was braided and tied back as usual and Clarke couldn’t help but think how beautiful she looked. When Lexa met her gaze, Clarke quickly looked away. The air felt heavy between them. So many things unspoken from the night before. Luckily for Clarke, Aria fell into general chatter with Lexa. 

Clarke’s hair was still wet, so she couldn’t have been asleep long. She quickly realised as she was stood in the throne room that she had not put a bra on, that she had more than happily taken from Arkadia when she left, and was in an army green singlet she had chosen to nap in. She was grateful she had grabbed her jacket as the sides cut low, where you can see the sides of her breasts. She had tight black trousers on, with multiple pockets running down the sides. Clarke fastened her jacket to help her feel less self-conscious. 

Clarke didn’t have to wait long before, the doors opened and a blurr flew in. “Lex!” And within seconds he was engulfed in Lexa’s arms. Now Clarke understood why this was better in private. 

“I missed you sprout,” She heard Lexa tell Noah. It was nice to see Lexa so happy.

Next he ran past Aria and dived into Clarke. “Hey, it’s not like I’m your sister and almost died or anything.” Aria shouted sarcastically as Noah ran past her. Clarke couldn’t help but chuckle. 

“Sorry Arrr, but I saw you like last week and you look fine to me.” He said over his shoulder as he hugged Clarke. 

“It’s been longer than a week and that was the last time you saw Clarke too!” Aria said with her arms crossed in front of her. 

Noah let go of Clarke, and Clarke bent down and kissed him on his cheek. Noah did his usual blush, and said “Yeah but Clarke gives the best kisses.”

“She does.” 

Clarke, nearly choked on nothing at the comment from Lexa. Lexa coughed, trying to hide her slip of the tongue. Luckily for her Dauriel and Thomas walked in, breaking the awkward moment, taking Lexa in to a hug of their own. Noah had been oblivious to the whole thing, but Aria had given her a knowing look. Making Clarke, blush and avoid looking at Aria. 

Noah was now snuggled into Aria, concern written all over his face, when Aria slightly winced at his grip. “I’m sorry, does it still hurt?”

“It’s ok,” She said ruffling his hair. “I am much better now.” She said smiling down at him. A moment later and her Ma and Pa were fussing all over her, checking she was ok. Then it wasn’t Long before they embraced Clarke.

“Clarke sweetie your hair, come by my room later and we will get that sorted.” Dauriel offered, looking over Clarkes hair in disapproval. Clarke soon remembered she had not even used the comb on her hair after her bath. It was still slightly wet, and messy from her towel. 

Clarkes hands flew to her head and she spun around subtly facing the wall away from everyone. Suddenly very conscious of Lexa and how she must look to her. She ran her fingers through her hair, doing the best she could to look presentable. Just as she was fighting her fingers through a knot, she felt a warm breath against the side of her neck, and a warm body slightly pressed against her back. Clarkes hands stilled, not daring to move. 

“You look beautiful Clarke.” Was all Lexa said. Within seconds the cool air hit her where Lexa had once stood. Clarke smiled and dropped her hair. She turned around and joined the others. Noah was now sat in the throne, pretending he was the commander. 

“You there guard, fetch me my feast.” He said shaking his belly in laughter. The guard he had pointed to just rolled his eyes like this was nothing new. No doubt though that if Noah did truly want something, anyone in the tower would oblige.

Noah jumped up and went over to talk to Lexa, who was talking with Thomas. Clarke was stood talking with Aria and Dauriel, pretending to listen and nod along whilst trying to listen to what Lexa was saying not far from her.

“I’m going to marry Clarke you know.” She heard Noah telling Lexa confidently, his chest puffed out slightly. 

“Oh is that so,” She heard Lexa reply, and could practically hear the smile that was spreading across her face as she spoke.

“Yep.”

“Does Clarke know about this.”

“It’s kind of unspoken.” Noah explained.

“Right” Lexa said sceptically.

“She is just so amazing, isn’t she?” Noah said.

“She is.” Clarke heard and could feel Lexa’s stare at the back of her head. It took all of Clarkes will power to resist meeting those green eyes.

Clarke couldn’t help but smile to herself at the conversation.

\------------------------

They all ate dinner together, Clarke loved introducing her friends to Aria’s family. Everyone got on so well. Clarke still didn’t dare meet Lexa’s gaze throughout dinner, feeling embarrassed about what happened the night before and remembering Lexa’s rejection. 

Dinner ran into the late evening, many enjoying the wine and laughter. Clarke limited herself to only a couple of glasses after last night. As most departed for the night. Clarke joined Dauriel along to their room that was opposite Lexa’s, for Dauriel to do her hair. Lexa had disappeared somewhere earlier in the night and Aria said she needed her rest and headed straight back to her room.

Clarke was sat in a chair as Dauriel stood behind her braiding her hair. 

“So, Clarke, are you going to tell me what’s going on between you and my daughter.”

Clarkes mouth slightly dropped at the sudden change of topic. Thomas was in Noah’s room next door putting him to sleep. 

“Ermm, nothing me and Aria are fine as ever.” Clarke played dumb.

Dauriel let out a slight chuckle. “I mean my other daughter, the one you wouldn’t look at all night, but who couldn’t look away from you.” 

Clarke was glad Dauriel could not see her reaction, no doubt, a look of being caught was written across her face and she could feel her cheeks going several shades darker.

“Right, that daughter.” Clarke said trying to hide her embarrassment by lightening the mood.

But then was stuck what to say next, so the awkward silence soon rushed over them.

“I haven’t seen her look at anyone the way she looks at you, not in a long time.” Dauriel’s voice grew sadder. “When we lost Costia, I wasn’t sure she would make it. But her purpose to serve her people kept her going. But she can’t keep living that way. She deserves something for herself.”

“She deserves better than me.” Clarke said her voice beginning to break. Blinking to keep a tear in.

“Clarke, what would make you say such a thing?” Dauriel said her voice laced with concern and her finger stilling where they were in Clarkes hair.

“Everyone I care about ends up hurt or killed. I have taken more lives than I can count, I...”

“Stop, just stop right there.” Dauriel said walking around and bending down to look at Clarke. “You cannot control what happens to those around you Clarke. We have all done things we are not proud of, but finding that special someone is what gets you through it, you share your burdens with them, you share everything with them, that’s how we survive.” Dauriel took Clarke into her embrace, and held her.

Thomas soon walked in and Dauriel went back to finishing Clarkes hair. Dauriel had braided just the top centre back for tonight, so it didn’t take too long. Clarke said goodnight and closed the door behind her.


	25. Chapter Twenty Five

Chapter 25 

Clarke began to walk towards the stairs, she planned on preferring her own bed tonight, to give her time alone to think. But as she passed Aria’s door she hesitated, knowing she would sleep better beside Aria. She knew Aria would be asleep so she gently went to open her door. But before she even created a gap; she heard a noise coming from Lexa’s room. Clarke was just about to continue and ignore it when she heard it again.

Clarke hastened over and knocked on Lexa’s door, but there was no answer. Cries rang out from behind the door. Clarke tried the door and luckily it was not locked. She ran into the room panicked; worried Lexa was hurt. “Lexa!” Clarke practically screamed as she came into the room, her eyes trying to adjust to the dark.

Clarke could see the outline of Lexa in her bed and moved to her side. The moon light from the window helped as she got closer. Clarke scanned for blood, but soon noticed Lexa was still asleep. Lexa’s body looked like it was fighting something, Lexa’s distressed words were not making any sense and her eyes were tightly closed. Clarke tried Lexa’s name again and went to touch her shoulder to try and wake her up. But before Clarke could get close enough. Lexa’s eyes shot open and she shot upright from where she lay on her furs.

“Hey, hey you’re ok, you’re safe.” Clarke said going to sit on the edge of the bed facing Lexa, putting her hand on her thigh, trying to rub soothing circles. Lexa was breathing heavily and closed her eyes, trying to calm herself. Clarke could feel her shaking and reached out her other hand to cup Lexa’s cheek. Lexa leaned into it, placing her own hand over Clarkes, still holding her eyes closed.

“It’s just me, you’re safe.” Lexa took some deep breaths and Clarke kept repeating “you’re safe,” over and over, until Lexa opened her eyes and looked at her. 

“I’m sorry Clarke,” Lexa said, her voice shaky.

“Shhh” Clarke replied. “You have nothing to apologise for Lexa.”

Lexa dropped her hand that was holding Clarkes in place, and looked away embarrassed.

Clarke let her own hand drop, but immediately found where Lexa’s had fallen on the bed and took it into her own. “Hey.” Clarke said, trying to get Lexa to look at her. Giving her hand a squeeze and continuing to rub a thumb back and forth over where her other hand rested on her leg. 

“I have them too. There is nothing like it, that terrified feeling that spreads right to your core, the moment you wake and you realise it’s not real, but nothing has ever felt more real. Night terrors are worse that nightmares and no one can understand if they haven’t experience it, it is something you can’t describe nor would you want to.”

Clarke paused as Lexa met her gaze. It was dark but Clarke could see her eyes glisten, full of tears and fear. 

“I stopped having them, after I met Aria. Being with her in her village, it felt like another world away, I am scared now I have left they will come back. That is why I haven’t yet been able to sleep on my own here.” Clarke confessed, hoping Lexa will feel better knowing an embarrassing secret of her own.

Silence fell between them, Clarke held Lexa’s gaze but for the first time, she could not read Lexa’s expression. 

To Clarkes surprise. Lexa let out a laugh. Pulling her hand free and wiping away her tears, through her half laugher and half leftover sobs. 

Clarke arched back a bit, placing her hands in her lap at the confusion. Lexa gathered herself enough to say “you said something along those lines last night, when you asked me to stay.”

Now it was Clarke who felt embarrassed. “Well not quite in those words.” She added with a small smile at the memory.

“Not quite those words?” Clarke dared to ask, already bracing herself for the answer. 

“More along the lines of, ‘Sexy Lexie please don’t leave me, I’m scared, what if a two headed giraffe reaches in and eats me’.” Lexa said, her voice becoming calmer as she spoke, still shaking a little, but allowing a laugh to sneak out.

Clarke was mortified. It was a thousand times worse than she had spent the day imagining, if Lexa wasn’t in such a state, she would run right now. Clarke turned so her back was to Lexa and ran her hand over her face, not sure what to say to that. 

“Please, please, never tell Aria I said that, she will never let me live it down.” Was all Clarke could say.

“I’ll add it to my list.” Clarke heard from behind her. At lexa’s words, Clarke whirled back around. 

“What list?” she said nervously. 

“I’m not sure if you’d want to know Clarke,” lexa said with a mischievous grin, teasing her. She liked this side of Lexa and would be able to enjoy it a lot more if she wasn’t filled with dread right now.

Clarke gave Lexa a look. Which made lexa say “Ok but I did warn you, some things are just better left not knowing Clarke.” Lexa paused to be certain Clarke wanted her to continue. When Clarke continued with her expectant look. Lexa revealed “you made me promise last night to not tell Aria how you thought me and her were romantically involved.”

Fuck, how did this start with Clarke trying to comfort Lexa to Clarke feeling utterly humiliated. “I can’t believe I told you that! Or begged you to stay with me. Clarke took a glance at Lexa. “Hey, your enjoying this!.” Clarke let out with a shake of her head. This made Lexa’s smile grow. 

Clarke teased back. “Maybe next time I hear you screaming, I won’t come to your ...” Before Clarke could finished, she realised she said the wrong thing. Although Lexa’s tears turned to laughter, it was only a moment ago that Lexa felt that terror. “Lexa I’m sorry...”

“It’s fine Clarke, it’s late, I’ve kept you long enough. Thank you for being here tonight. I promise your secrets are safe with me.” And just like that Lexa’s wall was up and a mask was back on her face. Clarke was grateful of the pieces of the real Lexa that she got to see. The moments of vulnerability and moments of joy, she knew it mustn’t be easy for Lexa to let people in, the first thing she taught her was love is weakness, and it must be hard to allow her commander armour to slip. It is easy to forget who you are when you have to be someone else to so many. Clarke knew this far to well.

Clarke stood up to go and took a few steps towards the door. “No.”

“No?” Lexa repeated back to her.

Clarke turned back to the bed and walked towards her. 

“No, I am not leaving.” Clarke crossed her arms annoyed.

Lexa lifted an eyebrow. “And why is that?” she asked. 

“Well... ermm... I saw a Giraffe in there earlier and it looked hungry.” A moment silence hung between them, but soon Lexa broke out in laughter. Clarke let out a breath she had been holding and was glad the tension was gone and Lexa was back.

“I wouldn’t want you to get eaten Clarke.” Lexa said gesturing to the other side of the bed.

Clarke sat on the edge with a small smile of her own, but hesitant to get too close.

Silence held the room, but Clarke wasn’t sure what to say next, so much had been left unsaid over the past few days.

“I am sorry I reacted like that, I know you were joking, but it scares me sometimes.” Lexa spoke quietly, enough to reach Clarkes ears.

“What scares you?” Clarke couldn’t help but wonder, inching closer, until her knee, touched Lexa’s thigh, and she could feel Lexa’s breath against her. 

“You.” Clarke was taken back by that, but didn’t move an inch, not wanting to discourage Lexa from continuing. “How easy it is around you, talking to you, it is like breathing, I forget myself sometimes, it scares me that just seeing your smile could make my worst day, into my best day. It scares me how your voice is like my own personal melody, calming and safe; how you can make me forget that there are hundreds of thousands of people that depend on me, that there is even anything that exists outside of your laugh. One minute I was in my worst nightmare, the next I was in my greatest dream. It scares me that I lo ...”

Lexa was stopped when warm lips met her own. Clarke wanted to hear more, but she couldn’t stop herself for another second, she needed to feel Lexa’s lips against hers, she wanted to show Lexa, just how much those words meant to her. Clarke could taste the fullness of Lexa’s lips. The warmth of her breath and she had never wanted anything more.

They came slightly a part, Clarke’s forehead resting against Lexa’s, both breathing heavily, trying to catch their breath. 

“Stay with me?” Lexa whispered against Clarkes lips.

Clarke nodded against Lexa. She pulled away and an unfastened her jacket, dropping it on the floor and reaching to slide her boots off.

Lexa was lay back against her pillow as Clarke lay next to her pulling her close, so that they were only inches apart. Clarke began to run a hand down Lexa’s back. Lexa’s eyes fluttered closed, enjoying Clarkes touch, their legs slowly weaving themselves together, trying to get as close to one another as possible. Clarke could feel every inch of Lexa that was pressed against her, she craved her so bad, but she knew tonight was not the night. Tonight, they would just enjoy having each other in each others arms. It felt surreal to Clarke, something she had rarely let herself even dream about. Neither said anything, they didn’t have to. They just held each other enjoying the moment, the feeling of happiness which filled them. Until they fell into a dreamless sleep.


	26. Chapter Twenty Six

Chapter 26

Clarke woke, in the exact position she had fallen asleep in, with her arm wrapped around Lexa. She couldn’t help but smile. She didn’t dare move, not wanting to disturb Lexa as she slept so peacefully, but inched away slightly to see her better. It wasn’t long until her eyes fluttered open, and the morning light sparkled the green in her eyes, more beautifully than Clarke had ever seen, she had never been so close to Lexa in this light to see, she could see every fleck of brown and shades of green, that surround the black in her eyes. She could feel her hands already itching to draw. Lexa smiled back at her.

Clarke reached up and tucked a strand of Lexa’s hair behind her ear, and ran her fingers along the side of her neck, over her shoulder, to the tips of her fingers and back up again. “Clarke?” Lexa broke the silence sounding curious. 

“mmmm.” Clarke responded, not quite ready to talk and disturb this moment just yet.

“What’s a Giraffe?”

Clarke couldn’t help but giggle like she was a kid again. 

“I’ll draw one for you.” She offered. 

“Were they very dangerous?” Lexa continued, clearly wondering about it since Clarke mentioned it after the tavern.

“Only if you are a tree.” Clarke said still laughing. 

Clarke thought it was adorable how confused Lexa looked right now. “Let’s just say drunk me is an idiot and had no clue as to what she was saying” Clarke tried to say to explain.

Lexa rolled onto her back and Clarke’s hand landed on Lexa’s stomach in the movement. 

Lexa looked deep in thought, it was starting to make Clarke nervous.

“I understand, people say false things when they are intoxicated.” Lexa stated. 

Clarke knew by Lexa’s tone that it had a double meaning and was no longer about the Giraffe. She could see the uncertainty in Lexa’s eyes, the doubt. It hurt Clarke that Lexa, still wouldn’t let herself have this, believe this, even with Clarke lay right here. It broke Clarke knowing that Lexa was struggling to let herself believe she cared, how someone so strong, so brave in the face of death, the leader of the ground, was too scared to let herself have this, did she not think she deserved to be loved?

Clarke pushed herself up on her forearm, and cupped Lexa’s face to make her look at her. “I meant every word Lexa. You have my heart. My sole. I am yours Lexa Kom Trikru.” Clarke ran her thumb across Lexa’s cheek bone, catching an escaped tear. “Ai hod yu in.” She whispered against Lexa’s lips as she leaned in brushing her lips over Lexa’s ever so slightly. Lexa reached up, running her fingers through Clarke’s hair, gripping the back of her head, holding her in place as she chased her lips. The moment their lips connected, Clarke couldn’t breathe, Lexa’s lips were wet and salty. Clarke wanted to kiss away her tears. Lexa pulled Clarke down against her. Clarke responded by deepening the kiss, moaning as Lexa ran her tongue along Clarkes bottom lip, asking her permission. Clarke opened her mouth willingly to meet Lexa’s tongue with her own. Clarke moaned at the contact, sucking Lexa’s bottom lip to taste her fully, right before connecting their tongues again. Lexa moaned into Clarke’s mouth, and Clarke wanted more of Lexa, she needed more of Lexa. 

Clarke let her hand run down the length on Lexa’s arms, and back up again and then slowly slid her arm around Lexa’s back pulling her closer, so that their bodies were now flushed together. Clarke felt lexa’s hands roaming her own back as she lay on top of her. Lexa ran her hands up Clarkes sides, grazing her nails over where she met skin. Clarke’s breath hitched and she lost all focus when she felt Lexa’s fingers slowly travel over the side of her breasts. Their lips had stilled but not disconnected from one another. Lexa moaned against Clarkes lips as she traced the curves under Clarkes plump skin, reaching further into her singlet. Clarke felt wetness flood her as lexa took both of her breasts, firmly in her hands, running a finger over her perked nipples. Clarke deepened their kiss once again, adjusting her position over Lexa, so she now had one leg between Lexa’s. Clarke lowered herself into Lexa with just enough pressure against her core to make her body thrust up in pleasure, wanting more. 

Clarke, felt the sudden loss of contact of Lexa’s hands roaming her. Lexa sat up knocking Clarke back slightly, grabbing Clarke’s thighs, pulling her on top of her so Clarke was now straddling her. Lexa ran her hands up Clarkes sides once more and whispered into her ear. “Do all people from the sky dress so exposed Clarke?” 

Before Clarke could answer, Lexa hands slid under Clarke’s top, and guided it over her head. There gaze met and the garment was tossed aside. Clarke had never seen Lexa’s eyes so dark, as she took in the new exposed skin in front of her. Their lips met again in hunger. Clarke felt Lexa roam her hands over Clarkes bare back. Lexa’s lips left hers, finding their way across her jaw to her neck. Lexa licked and sucked as she made her way down Clarke’s neck. Her teeth grazing against Clarkes Collar bone, following it along with kisses to her bare shoulder. Clarke moaned, running her fingers through Lexa’s hair as she bit down hard on her shoulder, then sucked and soother it over with her tongue. Lexa made her way back along Clarke’s collar bone, trailing kisses down between Clarkes breasts. Lexa’s hands made their way around from Clarkes back, never leaving skin, to grazed over perked nipples once again. Not a moment after, one of Lexa’s hands was replaced with her tongued without warning. Her tongued swirled around the sensitive bud, soon taking it in to her mouth fully, sucking hard. Clarke arched into her, holding her hair, encouraging her closer. The moan Lexa made as she devoured her breasts, sent a sensation through Clarke. She could feel her wetness growing between her legs. She needed more. “Lexa” Clarke breathed. She could feel Lexa’s smirk against her. Lexa knew what she needed and she was more than happy to ease Clarke’s suffering. 

In a blur, Clarke was thrown into the bed, her back now against the furs. Lexa continued her descent down Clarke, wet lips and tongue travelling towards her lower stomach. Clarke gripped the furs in anticipation, not trusting herself, to not push Lexa down quicker. She felt Lexa’s hand graze her hip and Lexa’s lips still continued to taste every inch of her. She arched her back as Lexa’s fingers ran across her stomach, slightly under the waistband of her trousers, as her fingers glided back cross, they inched lower. 

“Lexa? ” Followed by a knock, came from the door. Clarke had forgot about the world outside, and as much as she loved Dauriel, her timing was horrendous. 

Lexa’s lips disconnected from her skin, and Clarke could feel the cool air against her. She missed Lexa’s contact instantly and couldn’t help let out a whine in disapproval. 

Lexa’s eyes met Clarks for a second, before both pairs of eyes darted to the door as another knock echoed through. 

“Lexa if you don’t come down to breakfast soon, it’s going to be Noah who comes looking again and we both know he doesn’t know how to knock.” Her mother said through the door. 

Clarke quickly came back to reality, and leant over the bed looking for her top, she couldn’t find it and swooped up her jacket instead, trying to cover her half naked body as fast as she could. She knew the door wasn’t locked. 

“He won’t miss me enough to leave his food, I asked for pancakes for him.” Lexa said whilst looking at Clarke with a devious smile, that told her lexa had no intention of joining them for breakfast. 

“No... but he would miss Clarke.” Dauriel suggested pointedly.

Clarke face palmed her hand and fell back into the pillow. Great how did she know she was here, Clarke thought to herself.

Lexa let out a deep sigh. “We will be there soon.” Lexa said in defeat.

They listened to the footsteps walk away down the hall. 

Clarke sat up. “How did your mother know I was here?”

Lexa shrugged with a smile, “She knows everything. Once, when Aria was in trouble and she had to go to bed without supper. I snuck her a bowl of soup up, later that night when everyone else was a sleep. I made sure not to make a sound, and left everything spotless. Ma still asked how Aria’s dinner was when we went down for breakfast the next morning.” Lexa met Clarkes peculiar gaze. “What?” she asked Clarke. 

Clarke couldn’t help but just stare and smile. “nothing, it’s just hard to imagine you being a kid, having parents.”

“Did you think I hatched from an egg Clarke?” Lexa said amused. 

Lexa’s hair was loose and her face clear from any paint. Clarke loved Lexa’s like this, it was so easy to forget she was the commander. Here with Clarke, she was just Lexa. 

“Yes, a very large egg, that just cracked open and out you popped on the farm.” Clarke responded.

Lexa just laughed and reached over to where Clarke sat on the bed. “Speaking off the farm” Lexa paused, running her hand along the opening of Clarkes jacket, that she had failed to fasten. Widening the gap, a little more to get a better look at Clarke bare body. Her eyes roaming over her as she continued “I never gave you permission to borrow my fur coat Clarke.” Clarke visibly gulped as Lexa’s fingers ran down between her breasts, running the outline of one and coming back around to graze the other one. Her mouth was dry and she was struggling to get any words out as she closed her eyes to focus on Lexa’s touch.

Lexa leaned in; Clarke could feel her warm breath against her ear as she whispered. “Don’t get me wrong Clarke, it looks much better on you, but I would much prefer you without it right now.” Lexa nipped at the bottom of her ear as her roaming hand took Clarke fully in her grasp and leaving a slightly pinch to the nipple as she released her. Lexa’s hands ran across Clarkes shoulders, guiding the jacket to fall off of her. She then captured Clarkes lips in between her own. Lexa’s kisses were hungry and as much as she would prefer Lexa to have her for breakfast, she knew Dauriel wasn’t bluffing when she said Noah would come looking. 

A few moments longer and Clarke found the strength to pull away. Kissing someone had never felt so good. Lexa had her own unique taste that she had never noticed in anyone prior. It was sweet but a hint of fresh lemon and Clarke never wanted to taste anything else. All of her sense were heightened with Lexa, ever light touch, every movement, every sound, every taste, she noticed and was engraved into her memory already. She had never been so aware of another human being. Everything about her she took in. She could lay here forever and never get bored of her. But they didn’t have forever. Not yet. 

Clarke put her hand against Lexa’s chest to stop her accent. With her eyes still closed, she breathed out, still trying to catch her breath, “breakfast Lexa. We have to... go... to breakfast.” 

“hmmm or I could lock the door” Lexa responded about to go in for another kiss. But Clarke kept her hand there to push her back.

“And what will you tell Noah when he comes knocking,” Clarke asked with a raised eyebrow.

“hmmm, I don’t know Clarke.” She said staring deep into Clarkes eyes as she moved closer. Clarke giving in and relaxing her hand that held her away. “That I am stealing his future wife.”

Clarke blurted out laughing to that, right as lexa’s lips were about to reach her own. Clearly not the response Lexa was hoping for. “You’re a cruel sister” she said laughing. And you look adorable when you pout.” Clarke said, leaning in and giving Lexa a quick kiss. Before she stood up and picked up her top, pulling it on over her head. 

“I am going to grab some fresh clothes; I will meet you there soon.” Clarke said as she took the jacket off the bed, heading straight to the door, before the thought of Lexa pulled her back to bed. As Clarkes hand reached for the door knob. Something quickly clicked in Clarkes head, now that her senses were back. 

“Wait! Your jacket?” She asked turning to face Lexa where she sat at the edge of her bed. Lexa’s just smiled. Of course, Clarke thought. It wasn’t a spare bedroom they had. It was Lexa’s. 

Clarke simply smiled down at her hand that was holding the jacket. Lexa’s jacket. Clarke felt her cheeks go warm at the thought, all this time she was walking around in something that belong to Lexa. It warmed her heart to think she had been so close to Lexa all this time, been where Lexa grew up, where she had played and laughed and cried. That she has slept where Lexa had countless times before. She didn’t think it was possible after last night. But in a way she felt even closer to Lexa now.


	27. Chapter Twenty Seven

Chapter 27

Clarke rounded the corner into the dining room for breakfast. But stumbled back when she walked into what she felt like was a wall. She rubbed her head, to ease the pain.

“Sorry Clarke, I didn’t see you there. Sleep in today?” Lincoln said as Octavia appeared beside him. 

“You ok Clarke, did my boyfriend’s pecks give you a concussion.” Octavia said a little too proudly.

“I’m fine, where are you two off too?” Clarke asked making conversation. Although all she really wanted to do was see Lexa. She mustn’t have left her 15 minutes ago. But she could already feel some sort of agony growing inside of her, to be around her again, to simply hear her voice. 

“Us four, are going boxing.” Jasper said appearing on the other side of Lincoln, patting Lincolns shoulder. With Monty not far behind him.

“Boxing?” Clarke asked. 

“Yeah, you know. Boom. Boom. Bam. He said as he pretended to hit Monty jumping around on the spot. 

“We are going sparring Clarke.” Octavia jumped in rolling her eyes at Jaspers energetic display. “You are welcome to join us.” Octavia offered.

“Thanks, but I better get something to eat first.” Clarke replied.

“Ok, well you know where to find us.” Octavia said as they began to walk past her.

Clarke continued in from where they had come from. Finding Dauriel, Thomas, and Aria just finishing off the last bits on their plate, with Noah opposite them, slouched back in his chair, with his hands resting on top of his stomach, with what looked like syrup dried around his mouth. 

Clarke laughed at him as she walked in, but she soon lost her sound, when her eyes met Lexa’s. She sat in her usual seat at the head of the table. She could feel the charge of energy between them, the pull. She knew Lexa could feel it too, by the dark look in her eye, and the smile that spread across her face.

Clarke, coughed, trying to gather her thoughts as she sat next to Noah, greeting everyone good morning. She moved a plate out of the way, of whoever had previously sat there and got a fresh one, filling it with fruit. 

“Lexa, I thought you said there would be pancakes?” Clarke met Dauriel’s knowing look and felt her cheeks go hot, quickly looking down at her plate.

“I did.” Was all Lexa responded taking a grape into her mouth. Lexa’s hair was still loose, but she had change out of her clothes from this morning, well last night. Clarke hadn’t thought to ask why Lexa had not gotten changed before bed, but she just assumed she must have fallen asleep unplanned.

“Sorry Clarke,” said the chair beside her. Clarke looked to Noah who had a proud grin on his little face as he rubbed his belly. 

“Ahh I see, well in that case I’m just going to have to get it out of you.” Clarke said, reaching over to tickle him.

“No, please Clarke no. It hurts, it hurts.” Noah yelled out laughing. Clarke pitied the boy and gave in, returning to her fruit. 

“You’re lucky he wasn’t sick Clarke.” Aria said with a small laugh of her own. 

Clarke noticed how Lexa smiled as she focused on the food on her plate. It made her smile herself. 

“What made you two so happy?” Aria asked, her eyes flickering between Clarke and Lexa. This made Lexa’s head bolt up, like a deer in headlights.

“Am I not allowed to smile?” Lexa asked, keeping a calm composure as she took a drink of her juice. 

“No, it’s creeping me out.” Aria said. 

Everyone at the table laughed at that. Luckily for Lexa and Clarke, Noah changed the subject.

“Can I please give it to her yet?” He said looking at Dauriel. Dauriel took a moment to answer, deciding. 

“Ok, but be quick, we have a lot of old faces to visit today.” She agreed.

Noah’s grin spread across his face and he jumped up and ran out of the room, like he had never had the problem of being too full.

Lexa looked at her mother curiously and Dauriel responded, “Just a little something for Clarke that he wanted to bring with us.”

Lexa rolled her eyes. “Of course, he did.”

“Jealous of a 7-year-old Lex?” Aria asked mockingly.

Lexa choked slightly on her drink. Before she could respond to Aria’s joke. Noah was back in the room. 

“My sketch book!” Clarke practically squealed. It was the thing she had regretted most for leaving behind. That and a couple of the books she had read. 

“I thought you might be missing it.” He said sweetly. Clarke stood and took the sketch book and crouched down to kiss his cheek. “thank you.” She spoke. “It was very thoughtful of you.”

“You are very talent. Though I was surprised to find so many drawing off...” Before Noah could finish. Clarke had clasped her hand around his mouth so it turned into mumbles.

“erm... let’s just keep what’s in here between me and you yeah?” she whispered to Noah in desperation. “our own little secret.”

Noah just shrugged and Clarke dropped her hand from his mouth and he spoke. “I’ll meet you at the bottom,” he said to his parents and he shot off back out of the room. 

When Clarke turned around, they all looked at her with a bit of concern and confusion and curiosity. But no one asked, Aria, Dauriel and Thomas, knew she was private about her sketch book. 

The awkward silence continued. Clarke decided to break the air “Thank you for breakfast, but I better go catch up with Octavia and the others to practice my sparring.” Clarke said as she made her way for the door.

“Clarke.” She heard Lexa say with the click of the K that made her heart skip a beat. Clarke halted in her stride and turned back to the others.

“I have already informed the others, but I wanted to make you aware, the first of the leaders will be joining us tonight. Mikwell from Igranrona the Plains Riders, is due early this evening and others will be arriving from tomorrow, ready for the Annual Coalition meeting. He will be joining us for dinner this evening, you are all welcome as usual, but the choice is yours.” Lexa told her, from where she now stood at the table.

Clarke smiled “thank you for letting me know, I look forward to meeting the leaders of the clans.” Clarke turned to leave again but Lexa stopped her once again.

“Clarke? I was hoping you might join me for some time after lunch?” Lexa asked nervously.

“Sometime where?” Clarke asked curious.

“It’s a surprise.” Lexa said smiling. 

Clarkes heart fluttered in her chest and for a moment it was just them two in the room. Until...

“Better be a good surprise to compete with the sketch book. Our little brother has game.” Aria said as she bit an apple standing up. 

“Come on Clarke, Lexa can make heart eyes at you later. Let’s go spar.” Aria said as she walked past Clarke out of the room. 

Clarke smiled goodbye and quickly followed Aria, stopping by Aria’s room to find her bag, to place her sketch book in and then threw the bag on her back. And gathered her sword and knifes. Clarke and Aria argued the whole way down in the lift about whether Aria was well enough to spar. Aria was recovering by the day, but Clarke still wanted to make sure she was fully healed before she tried anything too strenuous. 

In the end it was agreed she could practice her aim, and have the odd practice with Monty or Jasper, but no one else that could actually do her any harm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I have finally completed the story! I should hopefully have out a new chapter every other day from now on. I just need to go back and edit. Please keep commenting and letting me know your thoughts, it really does help keep me motivated to keep posting!


	28. Chapter Twenty Eight

Chapter 28

She spent the rest of the morning between sparring, laughing at the side-lines with her friends and glancing back up at the commander’s tower. Her mind never strayed too far from Lexa. Now that she had but a taste, a mere moment that had felt like a life time, it was like a constant fight to stay away.

Clarke, was now sparring with Octavia, her last fight before they agreed to go for lunch, and then to Lexa. She didn’t know what Lexa’s surprise could be, but if it involved Lexa, that is all that mattered to her. Even with all Clarkes practice, Octavia still bested her, it was raw natural talent in Octavia, and Clarke wouldn’t want it any other way. The warrior suited Octavia, Clarke could see she was born for this. 

Octavia’s sword went left and Clarke only just managed to dodge it, but it cut part of her sleeve and nicked a bit of her skin. A thin line of blood was seeping out of her light blue tunic. Clarke hissed slightly at the pain, as she reached up to see the damage. 

“Are you ok?” Octavia asked. Clarke nodded. “Just lost one of my favourite tunic’s but I’ll get over it” she said with a laugh as the others gathered around her. 

“Don’t worry Clarke I can fix that.” Aria offered, ripping Clarkes Sleeve off and then moving to the other before Clarke could even answer. “There looks even better.” Aria said nodding, looking quite proud of herself. Monty and Jasper were nodding their agreement behind her. 

Lincoln took one of the discarded sleeves and fastened it around the cut. “Thank you.” Clarke said gratefully. As he was finishing tightening it, Clarke noticed his eyebrows crease in concern. Clarke your shoulder, did you land on it?” Lincoln asked. Clarke looked at her shoulder quickly noticing the bruise that had formed there. Lincoln stood back. 

“Are those bite marks.” Aria added. Clarke’s eyes darted at Aria in a silent plea. Clarke saw the moment Aria’s facial expression changed and she understood.

Clarke took a step back and mumble out to the others who were looking at her; “Erm its fine it was errr just a bump last night.”

“Last night?” Octavia repeated with a smile growing on her face and her eyes turned to suspicion on Clarke.

She liked that Lexa marked her, it turned her on just thinking about how Lexa had claimed her. But the last thing she needed was anyone finding about her and the commander, the relationship between the grounders and the sky people was hanging by a thread. She trusted her friends but if any of them let it slip, she had no idea how Lexa’s people would act, hell she wasn’t even sure how her friends would take. Did Lexa want anyone to know? Clarke hadn’t really thought about it.

Clarke shook herself out of her thoughts and tried to change the subject. “Anyone hungry, or is it just me?”

There were some nods and they were soon gathering their things heading back up into the tower. By the time they got to the top, they decided to go straight for lunch, Clarke thought she would change and clean the scratch of a wound after. She barely had anything at breakfast and her stomach wouldn’t stop growling. 

They made their way out of the lift and along the hall to where lunch was served. As they were about to head in, Lexa walked out. Lincoln and Octavia bowed slightly in respect, “Commander” they said in greeting. Monty, Jasper and Clarke copied, but Aria stood tall. 

Clarke saw Lexa’s smile slip from her face and her eyes travelled to the blood that covered some of Clarke’s arm, that had slightly bled through the sleeve that Lincoln had tied around. The blood was dry now and the cut was not deep, but the blood made it look worse than it was. 

Instantly Lexa was in front of Clarke. “What happened, are you okay Clarke?” Lexa asked concern laced in her voice, standing far to close to Clarke than normal. Lexa ran her thumb over the bloody fabric and looked up into Clarkes eyes, waiting for an answer. 

For a moment Clarke forgot to speak, her mind on Lexa’s touch and how close Lexa was. A cough came from beside her and she remembered the question. “Yes fine, we were just sparring.” Lexa gave a nod but didn’t drop her hand or step back out of Clarkes space. “Meet me in the stables after you have eaten.” Before Clarke could answer, Lexa had disappeared into the lift. 

It took a moment for anyone to speak. “Well that solves that mystery then.” Octavia said sounding annoyed. And stormed off past the dining room. Lincoln followed and Clarke could hear his faint words. “Octavia that is the commander you are talking about...” But soon he was too far out of ear shot. 

Clarke turned to the others who still stood in the hall. It was the first time she had ever seen Jasper or Monty so silent. Monty coughed, “well lets say we go fill those stomachs of ours?” he said with a smile. Clarke couldn’t help but smile back, Monty was always so kind. As they sat down, Aria asked Monty and Jasper questions about space, Clarke was grateful to her for carrying the conversation. 

Clarke needed to speak to Octavia, but she wasn’t going to let her ruin the day ahead. 

Clarke joined the conversation and filled her stomach, eating more quickly than she ever had before, she barely had time to taste her food before she could swallow it. 

She washed down the last of her food with some water and she quickly excused herself, from the table and headed straight to her room. The wardrobe in her room was now filled with more things for her to wear as she decided she couldn’t keep living in Aria’s. 

She un wrapped her arm and cleaned it, it was just a scratch that had already healed over, just leaving a thin red line in its wake. She pulled on a fresh navy-blue tunic and slipped on her jacket. She took her bag over her shoulder and practically skipped to the stables in excitement. 

Lexa was outside the tower doors waiting for her with two servants who held onto two massive horses. One jet black and the other more of a bronze. Clarke lost her breath as Lexa turned at the sounds of her footsteps. She was stood in her full commander uniform, her red sash hanging over her shoulder and the gold piece she wore between her eye brows. But her face was clear of war paint. 

“Clarke come meet Cleo, she is a magnificent horse”. Clarke stepped forward and went to the black horse Lexa was referring to. 

Clarke reached up and could feel the horse’s warm breath against her hand as she got closer. She ran her hand down its nose and reached up with her other one to pet it’s mane. “She is incredible, Clarke said smiling back at Lexa. 

“She is yours.” Lexa informed her. Clarke opened her mouth to protest, but the way Lexa’s looked at her changed her mind. Clarke could see the joy radiating from Lexa in being able to gift this to Clarke.

So instead, Clarke simply said thank you. 

They mounted their horses and headed out of a side gate; four guards followed behind them. 

They kept their horses at a walk and Clarke soaked in the forest that was growing around them. The silence was peaceful, she could hear the birds chirping, the river flowing and the wind weaving its way around the trees. The sky was blue and although the air still had a chill, it was a lot hotter than it had been in the previous days. Aria always said, even in the dead of winter the sun can burn, and even in the height of summer, some days could still freeze. Clarke was unsure if this was an effect of the bombs or, if this had always been the climate here. 

“Thank you for my surprise.” Clarke said, reaching down to pat her new friends. 

“She was not your surprise Clarke.” Clarke couldn’t stop the grin that spread across her face at Lexa’s words.

“So, I guess you will not tell me where we are going?” Clarke tried, giving Lexa a sideways glance. 

Lexa smiled, her gaze still looking forward. “Your guess would be correct Clarke.”

“How is your arm?” Lexa asked. 

“Fine it was just a graze, the blood made it look worse.” Clarke answered.

“I would prefer your blood to stay inside of you in the future Clarke.” Lexa said playfully.

“I would very much prefer that too.” Clarke said with a laugh. 

There was no awkward silence between them, Clarke had never felt anything more natural than being around Lexa. It came so easily. 

“I never thanked you, for what you did at the tavern.” Clarke noticed Lexa’s grip tighten on her reins and the way her jaw locked. Clarke wasn’t sure what she had said wrong.

“I should not have left him with his life.” Lexa strained to say at the memory. Clarke could feel Lexa’s anger. 

“Hey” Clarke said pulling her horse to a halt, looking at Lexa as she stopped hers. “You saved me; I am right here. He doesn’t deserve a second more of your thoughts.” 

Lexa looked up and met her eyes, “when your friends returned without you.” Lexa paused trying to find her words. “I had to know you were safe.” Clarke reached out her hand to Lexa’s not caring of the guards behind. Lexa placed her hand atop of Clarkes. “I know.” Clarke said as she looked down at her hands. “Lexa this scares me.” Lexa sat pulling her horse as close to Clarkes as she could. “I want this, I want us, but we both know – “ 

“Don’t” Lexa cut in. “We have today.” She said with a weak smile and squeezed Clarkes hand. Then pulled away and continued their path. Clarkes horse automatically started following Lexa’s as Clarke was lost in a thought that she had tried so desperately to run from. The thought of tomorrow and every day after. 

The ride continued for about an hour, they had talked and laughed about anything and everything. Lexa told Clarke more stories from when she was growing up with Aria, she had less stories of Noah, as she became commander when he was little. Clarke told her about the sky, about her dad, how they survived up there, what she knew of the world before, and Lexa told her what she knew of the past also, which was a lot more than Clarke imagine. Lexa told her about the Libraries that still stood, most in other Clans, but Lexa often visited them when she travelled and she promised to take Clarke one day.

Soon Lexa, brought them to a halt and told her guards to set up camp here. And Lexa continued them on. Clarke waited until they were far enough away so the guards couldn’t her. “Make camp?” Clarke asked confused. 

Lexa looked at her with a secret smile as their horses carried on. “We have today Clarke. But we can also have tonight.” Clarke’s heart, beat fast in her chest and she was sure Lexa would be able to hear it, if it wasn’t for the horse’s hoofs hitting the floor and the sound of rushing water. “If at any point you would like to head back Clarke, just say the word, otherwise I have arranged for Aria to welcome the Ingranrona leader in my absence, they are old friends and I will not be missed. But tomorrow, when other leaders begin to arrive, I will not be able to so easily disappear.” Lexa explained. “I want to give us tonight Clarke. Life is about more than just surviving, correct?”

Clarke smiled at the memory, “what fool told you that?” 

“A kind, yet ferocious one, one so driven, so smart, she could take over the world one day, yet one who does not want that.”

Clarke’s breath hitched. But before she could respond their horses stopped in a clearing. If Clarke wasn’t already speechless, she was now. A hundred metres in front of them, lay a pool of the bluest water Clarke had ever seen, steam lifted up of its surfaces, and a tall waterfall fell into it. A rock wall stood firm behind it and small and large rocks encircled its edge. 

There was already a tent pitched on the grass, not Lexa’s usual tent, but a much smaller one, only big enough for two to lay down in. There was a foldable table and two chairs beside it, and another longer table that held all sorts of fruits and breads and meats. Lanterns were dotted around but not yet lit, and the fire in the middle was yet to be in flame.

“Lexa” Clare barely breathed. Clarke had no idea Lexa could be so thoughtful. So sweet. A young boy appeared and took hold of the horses. Clarke barely registered anything until she was sliding off her horse, being caught in Lexa’s arms. They were now so close, Clarke could feel Lexa’s breath, Lexa’s arms still circled her and her hands rested on Lexa’s shoulders. 

“Do you like it?” Lexa sounded so vulnerable, like she was terrified of the answer. 

“Lexa, I love it,” she said, tears forming in her eyes. Never did she think she could have a moment like this, not in this world, not in this Chaos. 

Clarke jumped as the horses moved from behind her and disappeared into the trees. Clarke turned to face the water fall, taking a few steps towards it. She let out a deep breath, this was the first time she felt like she could finally breathe since landing on the ground, the first time she felt safe. It was not a place that gave her this, it was Lexa. Lexa was her peace in the never-ending conflict. If it was not an actual conflict, it was an internal one. Tonight, she would fight no more. Tonight, she would let her mind be here and only here, with the woman she loved, she would let Lexa consume her every thought, every touch, every feeling.


	29. Chapter Twenty Nine

Chapter 29

Clarke still hadn’t made a sound as she looked onto the water, taking this moment in. She felt Lexa’s presence behind her. She felt her hands grasp either side of her waist, and felt Lexa front against her back as Lexa pulled her against her. Lexa’s hands clasped in front of her and Clarke rested her own on top of Lexa’s. Her hands were warm and soft. She leaned her head back on Lexa’s shoulder and closed her eyes. 

Lexa kissed the side of her exposed neck and whispered into Clarke’s ear; “the moment I heard of the warrior who fell from the sky, who had set my army a flame, I knew I had to meet you. There was something in me that pulled me towards you even then. I was so intrigued; I could not stay in Polis so I came myself. The moment you stepped into my tent; I knew you’d take my heart. It is yours Clarke.” She kissed her again gently behind her ear.

Clarke spun around in her arms and looked up into Lexa’s eyes. She ran her hand along lexa’s jaw and felt Lexa’s hair thread through her fingers as she pulled her close. Their lips brushed so softly, so gently, she could feel her heart beating against Lexa’s, like a battle between them. She felt every moment, the way Lexa’s tongue danced with her own, Lexa’s hand gliding across her back, pulling them closer. Clarke had never felt this happy, and with that thought, she couldn’t stop herself from smiling. Lexa smiled in return, they continued to try kiss, but their smiles prevented it. Who knew it was so hard to kiss when smiling? So, their smiles turned into laughter. “I love your laugh.” Clarke couldn’t help blurt out. Still inches from each other. 

“I love you.” Lexa responded taking Clarke into her arms in an embrace.

A few minutes later, when it would become weird to hold each other for any longer, they drew apart. 

“Would you like to go for a swim Clarke of the sky people?” Lexa said with a mischievous grin. The sun was still bright above them, they would have a few more hours until it settled, but it was still cold. 

“I think we would freeze to death Lexa.” Clarke said looking at the water. 

“The water is warm Clarke, all year round, I believe you would know them as hot springs.”

“and what do you call them?” Clarke asked.

“Pool of warm water.” Lexa said simply.

“Makes sense,” Clarke said walking over to the table that held the food, taking a piece of melon into her mouth. Clarke began to look around at the edges of the woods.

“I assure you Clarke, we are alone and will not be disturbed. No more knocking.” Lexa said playfully as Clarke walked back towards her. 

“Ahhh, so that’s why you brought me here, the truth finally comes out, you just wanted me all to yourself so you can have your way with me.” Clarke said poking Lexa’s shoulder in accusation. 

Lexa stood firm. “Yes”. 

Clarke swallowed her last piece of melon, with a gulp. Fuck, was all she could think. She knew it wasn’t true, she could say no right now and they would still have the most amazing night. But the way Lexa was looking at her made her weak. Clarke loved when Lexa turned fierce with desire, but Clarke wanted to have some fun of her own. Her lips were almost touching Lexa’s, she had not realised she had been drifting in. She saw Lexa’s eyes close, but when Lexa opened them, there was no one in front of her. 

Clarke made her way to the water’s edge, she could feel the heat radiating off of it, in every step she took closer, as well as the heat from Lexa’s gaze burning into her. She slowly slipped her jacket off and dropped it onto the floor as she walked closer. She then undid her belt and slid of her tunic over her head. All her actions were so slow, just to make Lexa wait that little longer. She undid her bra and slid out of her trousers and boots. Just as her feet touched the shallows of the warm water, she let her under wear drop, and discarded them to the side. She did not even glance at Lexa. She just continued to walk in deeper. She had never been more grateful to know how to swim. The warmth eloped her, and her muscles ached in a wonderful way. She kept her head forward and swam towards the waterfall. She dipped under the water and came out just behind it. She was now between the rocks and the fall.

She could no longer see Lexa, but she didn’t need to, to know she would follow. Clarke found a ledge, and rested with her head against the rock and closed her eyes. It was not long before she heard the change in the fall and knew Lexa was stood before her. She smiled with her eyes still closed. Lips met hers and her hands automatically reach out, to her find the gorgeous woman that was hers. One of Lexa’s hands was cupped around the side of Clarkes face and Clarke used it as an anchor to find her without opening her eyes. Her hand grasped on to Lexa’s arm and slid along her wet skin to her shoulder, she glided her hand over her shoulder and pulled her closer. She ran her hand down Lexa’s back, feeling and tracing old scars, she wanted to know every inch of her.

Her hand continued down as her other hand, weaved its way into Lexa’s tangled wet hair. When her hand reached the smooth curve of Lexa butt, she grazed her nails over her and back up her spine. Lexa’s breathing Laboured and their tongues fought for dominance. Both of Clarke’s hands ran down Lexa’s sides and over her hips. She pulled Lexa close and Lexa put a knee either side of Clarke on the ledge. Clarke continued to pull her down and closer. Clarke moaned into Lexa’s mouth as she felt Lexa’s core move against Clarkes lower stomach. Even in the water Clarke could feel how wet Lexa was. 

Lexa began to rock against her, as she griped Clarke’s hair in one hand and held the wall behind them with the other. It was dark behind the fall, but Clarke could still just make out those green eyes, as she pulled her lips away from Lexa’s. She soon moved to reconnect her lips with Lexa’s neck, running her tongue from the base of Lexa’s neck back up to where her jaw meets her ear, tasting the water droplets on Lexa’s skin. 

Clarke’s hands stayed on Lexa’s hips, encouraging her to grind against Clarke’s stomach. Clarke loved the moans that were escaping Lexa, as she continued her trail of kisses towards lexa’s breasts. Lexa arched further into Clarke, letting her head hang back and her hair fall, slightly touching the water. The water sat just below Lexa’s breasts and the way she arched for Clarke to take her was sending Clarke wild.

Clarke pulled back slightly, taking in the sight that was Lexa’s, her tanned skin, looking even more delicious in the sparkle of the water, her dark nipples, bobbing above the water waiting for her. She bent forward and place a kiss on one of the perfect nipples, but she soon felt Lexa’s grip tighten in her hair, the way she grinded down harder against Clarke; Clarke knew she needed more. 

She took one of Lexa’s nipple into her mouth, allowing one of her front teeth to slightly graze it, before she let her tongue run rouge on it. Her other hand automatically left Lexa’s hip and needed the other breast. She wanted to make lexa make the sound that escaped her a thousand times over. 

She rolled one of lexa’s nipples gently between two of her fingers, before she switched to the other nipple with her mouth. She felt Lexa slow in her movement, falling lost in the pleasure of what Clarke’s mouth was doing, so Clarke took the opportunity to move one of her hands in-between them. 

She dragged the backs of her fingertips along the inside of Lexa’s thigh, she felt Lexa twitch at the movement, and Lexa’s heart beat getting faster, copying her own. Clarke could feel the heat coming from between Lexa’s legs as so got closer. She twisted and slid her hand through Lexa’s wet folds slowly, making her way up to Lexa’s sensitive bud. Clarke dropped her nipple as Lexa began to move against Clarkes fingers, helping her brush against her clit, just the way she liked. 

Clarkes forehead rested against Lexa’s chest as they moved together in a steady motion. Clarke switched her fingers to her thumb and she thrust a finger inside of Lexa. It slid straight into her, consumed by her wetness and Clarke loved the feeling of Lexa riding her hand as she was inside of her. It made her own wetness escape her. After Lexa had adjusted to Clarke being inside of her, Clarke slowly added another finger, loving the feeling of Lexa tight around her fingers. 

Lexa moaned out in approval and began to move against Clarke faster. Clarke barely pulled in and out, just enough movement to curl her fingers, to find the spot Lexa most liked. “There” she heard Lexa breathe out. Clarke continued against Lexa’s inside wall as she circled her clit with her thumb. Lexa said something in grounder that Clarke was unable to translate with the sound barrier of the water fall. 

The way Lexa breathed and how she was beginning to tighten around Clarkes fingers, she knew it wouldn’t take long for Lexa to fall over the edge. Clarke rubbed against the side of Lexa’s clit with her thumb adding a little more pressure, it was all Lexa needed. Clarke felt Lexa’s convulse around her fingers, wetness coating them, but Clarke continued on in her movements, to draw out Lexa’s pleasure as long as possible. Once Lexa stilled, only then did Clarke, slow and gently with draw. Lexa’s head fell against Clarke’s shoulder, trying to catch her breath. Clarke rubbed soothingly with her nails, gently on Lexa’s back as she recovered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all again for following this story and for all those who have commented their support! My favourite part of doing this is getting a comment! So keep them coming!


	30. Chapter Thirty

Chapter 30

After a few minutes Lexa lifted her head from Clarke’s shoulder and took Clarkes lips in for a tender kiss. “You leave me without words Clarke.” 

Lexa slowly pulled back, finding Clarke hand to hold, entwining their fingers. Clarke let Lexa pull her through the water fall and soon she could feel her feet along the sand that lay at the bottom. 

Before Clarkes shoulders came exposed to the cool air. Lexa stopped swimming and turned to Clarke, taking her in for another kiss. Clarke felt lexa’s naked body slide against her own through the warm water. Clarke moaned into Lexa’s mouth as she felt Lexa’s nipples brush against her own and pulled Lexa in tighter against her, their breasts pressing against one another, like that was where they belonged. Clarke felt Lexa’s hands running down her back, giving her a squeeze and a slight graze from her nails as they dug into her butt, before Lexa picked her up and began to walk somewhere to one side with her. 

The cool air hit Clarke, but she barely noticed, her body felt like she was on fire. To Clarke’s surprise Lexa lifted her onto a smooth rock. Clarke felt expose, being nearly entirely out of the water in the daylight. But the adoration on Lexa’s face soon eased her concern and she relaxed. It was just the bottom of her legs that now dangled into the warmth of the water. 

Their gaze, into each other’s eyes, continued a moment longer, until, Lexa moved to stand between Clarkes legs and kissed her. Lexa sucked Clarke’s lip into her mouth many times, turning Clarke on more each time. 

Lexa let go of her lips and rested her head against Clarkes. “I want to taste you.” Clarke’s heart fluttered at the thought, her mouth went dry and she could feel the throbbing between her legs worsen as she imagined Lexa between her. Clarke didn’t trust her voice, so she nodded against Lexa. 

It was all Lexa needed. Before Clarke knew what was happening. Lexa was guiding her down against the rock, her hand against Clarke’s chest in direction. Clarke did as Lexa wanted and lay back against the rock. 

The rock was not big enough to support Clarke’s head but she did not mind, she let it fall back in anticipation. She let her whole body relax as Lexa grazed her hip bone with her teeth. Lexa’s hands travelled up from Clarke’s navel, to discover her breasts. Her mouth inched closer to Clarke throbbing centre. But just as Lexa neared, so close Clarke could feel Lexa’s breath against her heat, her lips disappeared.

Clarke was just about to lift her head up to see what was going on, when she felt a strong wet tongue run through her folds. “fuck” Clarke murmured. She did not expect the sudden assault. Her body lifted in pleasure. Lexa moaned at her taste and Clarke could feel it vibrate against her. 

Lexa’s tongue lashed in and out of her opening and Clarke thought this must be heaven. It wasn’t going to take long for Clarke to reach her orgasm, she thought she would cum, just from touching Lexa herself. 

Soon Lexa travelled up to Clarke clit and took it into her mouth, sucking slowly on the small bud. Her tongue moved in just the right motion, with just the right amount of pleasure. Lexa continued consistently, working Clarke up and up. 

“Please Lexa don’t stop.” Clarke didn’t want Lexa to move or change a thing, Lexa was incredible it was like she knew what Clarke wanted straight away. 

Clarke began to move with her, as she felt her orgasm build. As she reached her peak, she stilled, but Lexa kept her motion steady and Clarke fell into the most amazing bliss, her body jolted in pleasure and soon her body relaxed. 

She reached her hand into Lexa’s hair and sat up on her other elbow. She ran her hand to Lexa’s chin, confirming she could stop. Only by Clarkes pull to her, did she stop. Clarke guided her up on to the rock beside her, where she sat next to Clarke, but facing the other way so her legs swung off the other side. 

They sat like yin and yang, two parts of a soul finally finding one another. Clarke pulled her in for a kiss, she could taste herself that still lingered on her lips, but she didn’t care, she kissed her with all the passion in the world, with whatever she could, to show her how much she cared.

\-------------------------------------------------------- 

The sun had now set, disappearing behind the waterfall, they lay naked, on top of a blanket, by the now roaring fire. Clarke never wanted to put on clothes, she wanted to feel as close to Lexa as she possibly could with nothing in-between them. Clarke had spent the day getting to know every part of Lexa, from her scars that lined her body, to each of her tattoos and their meanings. They had a blanket covering them both as the night grew colder. But Clarke had never felt more a flame, than beside Lexa. They held each other now as they looked up at the stars. 

“My favourite book is about the stars; I must have read it a thousand times growing up. When I first grazed my knee and black blood drew, I knew my time would could when the flame keepers would come looking. I wished on every shooting star I saw, for it to take me away, so I could adventure through the stars and have a different life.”

Clarke leaned on her side, gazing up in wonder as she spoke. Clarke couldn’t help but smile at how different their lives had been. “I dreamt of the ground and it’s beauty, its flowers, it’s lakes and it’s animals. I dreamt of escaping the endless darkness, to a world of colour.” Lexa went onto her side, mirroring Clarke and reached up to tuck a hair behind Clarke’s ear. 

“I wish my dad had been here to see this.” Lexa’s eye brows shot up in shock. Clarke laughed and pushed her shoulder playfully, rolling her eyes. “Not us Lex. Earth. It is as beautiful as the books described and the old movies and paintings.” Clarke got lost in thought of her dad for a moment. She felt Lexa take hold of her hand. 

“He would have loved you, he said only royalty was good enough for his princess.” Clarke remembered with a smile. “I guess the ruler of the ground counts.” Clarke said with a laugh. 

“Not quite the ruler of the ground but I would have loved to meet him Clarke, he sounds like he was a good man.”

“He was.” Clarke felt sadness fill her at the memory of his death. Clarke had yet to tell Lexa about her mother’s part in it, but it would not be tonight, tonight was for happy memories not sad ones. They had avoided any talk of the past, of the mountain, or of Azgeda and their upcoming problems. They wanted tonight to be just about them.

Clarke wanted to change the subject, so she asked Lexa something that had been on her mind all day. “Do your people not question why we are here?” She lay her head on Lexa’s chest and Lexa absentmindedly began to run her fingers through Clarke’s hair.

“My people would never question me Clarke.” Lexa responded.

“I know but surely they must suspect something.” Clarke tried to say.

“I trust the guards I brought with us. I would have their tongues if they discussed any of my affairs, personal or other. However, if my people talk, so be it, I would never hide you Clarke.” Clarke felt her heart sore. She didn’t realise how much those words meant to her until Lexa said them.

It gave Clarke a flicker of hope, that maybe someday, if things go smoothly and Skaikru become the thirteenth clan, then maybe Clarke could stay in Polis and they could have a future. 

Clarke didn’t want to give herself false hope, but as each moment passed, she fell deeper and deeper for Lexa, when Clarke thought of the future all she could see was Lexa, all she wanted was her. She felt like part of her was betraying her people but if they were safe, she didn’t care, she wanted to have more nights like this, to simply be happy.

“What are you thinking?” Lexa asked, bringing Clarke out of her thoughts. 

“How amazing you are and how happy I am.” This brought a smile to Lexa’s face.

“I am happy too Clarke”.

They continued to talk until their teeth began to chatter and they decided they best go inside the tent. Lexa gathered their clothes and put her own on, informing Clarke she needed to signal for someone to come and clear the food, so they would not attract animals in the night. 

Clarke, fell into the furs of the tent, too tired to put clothes on. She heard rustling outside and a few hushed voices and then soon Lexa appeared inside. Clarke exaggerated a pout as Lexa huddled inside. “Is something the matter Clarke?” Lexa asked as she tied the flaps close. 

She felt Clarke nip at her ear as she finished. “Yes, you are wearing to many clothes commander.” Clarke’s voice was deep with desire. 

“Someone indeed has woken up since moments ago.” Lexa laughed.

It wasn’t long until Clarke had Lexa sliding against her naked, panting as both moved against each other. “I never want to stop loving you” Clarke whispered against Lexa, not entirely sure lexa would even hear her. 

“Then don’t” Lexa said in return. 

They continued to devour one another late into the night, until their bodies collapse in exhausted, and they both fell into a blissful sleep, tangled up on one another.


	31. Chapter Thirty One

Chapter 31

The tent did little to keep the morning sun out and they soon awoke, smiling at one another in their new found happiness. They pulled each other in for a kiss. Content, they lay tracing each others bodies. 

Eventually Lexa broke the silence. “I have never slept so soundly as I sleep next to you Clarke.” 

“It is the same for me” Clarke responded as she ran a thumb across Lexa’s cheek, taking in her beauty.

“What if we don’t go back? What if we hide away just you and me? I do not want this to end Lexa.” 

“It won’t end I promise. You will be lay in my arms like this tonight, and for as many nights as you will let me, it doesn’t matter whether we are here or in the stars Clarke, I do not plan on letting you go.” Clarke met Lexa’s lips for a deep, slow kiss.

Lexa dozed back off to sleep and Clarke reached for her sketch book. She left Lexa to her peaceful sleep and pulled her tunic over her head, leaving it loose, just covering everywhere she needed, as she sat back on their blanket from the night before.

An unknown amount of time passed and Clarke was now wrapped up in the blanket, nearly finishing her drawing of the scenery in front of her, she wanted to have something to look back on at the memory.

She heard the tent flat rustle open and Lexa’s footsteps, as she came to her. Clarke continued her drawing not looking up, she knew if she looked at Lexa, she wouldn’t want to finish her sketch.

Lexa sat beside her wrapped in a fur blanket of her own, but still naked beneath, Clarke took a glance and saw her bare shoulders poking out, but did not meet her eyes as she continued to finish her drawing. 

Ten more minutes and Clarke was satisfied with it and went to close it and put her book away. Just as the book gently closed, Lexa’s hand fell on top of its leather. Clarke looked up to meet her eyes. Clarke could see the silent question behind her gentle and longing gaze.

It took Clarke a few minutes to decide, but she didn’t want to hide anything from Lexa, she wanted Lexa to have all of her. So slowly she let go of the book that was rested against her legs and Lexa took it into her own lap.

Clarke took a deep breath, and Lexa’s gaze asked her another confirm it was ok. Clarke nodded but looked away at the water flowing from the rocks above.

Lexa went to open it to the first page. Clarke knew her sketch book cover to cover, the first thing Lexa would see is Noah, his green eyes and floppy hair holding a chicken, with a huge grin that never seemed to leave his face. Clarke smiled at the memory. 

She heard the page turn and Lexa would see the house Lexa had grown up in. Next would be a tree, but then Lexa would see her own reflection. Clarke could feel her stomach turn to knots in anticipation.

When the page turned, Clarke closed her eyes, she heard Lexa’s breath catch. After too much silence Clarke dared to look at her. Lexa had continued on to find more drawings of herself. 

Clarke looked up to Lexa and saw a tear in her eye, before she could even open her mouth to speak, her lips were stopped with Lexa’s. They met in a tangled mess that left Clarke breathless as Lexa pulled away. 

“Remind me to draw you more often.” Clarke said with a wicked grin. Lexa bumped her own shoulder into Clarkes and laughed and she continued through the drawings. 

As Lexa closed the book, Clarke whispered into her ear; “I never stopped thinking about you, you consume me Lexa.” 

“Clarke?” Lexa said with uncertainty. “What happened at the mountain.” That was not where Clarke had hoped it was going. It was the last thing she wanted to think about right now, she knew they would have to discuss it sooner or later but Clarke preferred the latter. 

“It’s in the past Lexa.” Clarke tried.

“I understand if you cannot forgive me, I could not expect or allow my people to be thrown on the sword for you, not when they could be spared, but it doesn’t mean I wouldn’t give my own life for you, Clarke.” 

“I understand why you did what you did, I forgave you a long time ago Lexa. I’ve accepted the choices I have made. I am not going to let how I felt in the past, affect how I feel today, nor that of my fears of tomorrow.” Clarke responded. 

Lexa nodded at Clarkes words and looked down at the sketch book in her hands. 

Clarke could feel Lexa’s uncertainty. “I Love you Lexa kom Trikru, I don’t think anything you could do will change that, there is no mountain that we cannot survive.”

“I am not always Lexa kom Trikru Clarke, I am also the Commander.” Lexa said. Clarke now understood where all this is coming from.

“Lexa.” Clarke said taking her hand and meeting her nervous gaze. “I love the Lexa who takes me away to magical waterfalls, who watches over me whilst I sleep in case a giant gorilla attacks, the Lexa who sneaks up food for her sister in the night” Lexa gaze drew away again. “I also love the fierce Commander who’s tent I enter into; unsure if I would leave alive, the Lexa who say’s love is weakness, even though it is the greatest strength. I love the Lexa who turned her back on me at the mountain.” 

Clarke glided her hand across Lexa’s cheek, turning her head and leaning in until their foreheads touched. “I love every part of you Lexa, the good, the bad and the ugly.” Clarke spoke against her lips, so desperate for Lexa to believe her. She met her lips lovingly into her own. When she pulled a way she couldn’t help but add. “But please do not betray me again, I do not think my heart can take it.”

“I won’t.” Lexa responded instantly. Clarke had never heard her sound so serious. “In a few days’ time you will take the brand of the Coalition, your people and my people will become our people, and we will never have to choose them over each other again.” Lexa said with a smile at the thought. “And I will be able to protect you from any threat.” Lexa said going serious again. Clarke thought she must be thinking of what happened to Costia, she felt guilty for the other day, when she threw being caught by Azgeda in Lexa’s face.   
Clarke wasn’t sure how to respond, she wanted to enjoy the time they had left alone together, so she tried to lighten the mood. “Who says you’d be protecting me, I am the commander of death after all and I’m pretty sure that trumps just the regular commander, and after Noah’s teachings, I reckon I could even take you in a fight.” Clarke said with a challenging grin on her face.

“Oh is that so.” Lexa uttered back. 

“mmhmmm.” 

Before Clarke knew it, she was fastened to the ground, both hands pinned to either side of her head, and a completely nude lexa on top of her. Lexa’s hair was hanging down tickling Clarke’s face and she had a huge smug look written across her face. 

“You can’t escape Clarke.”

“There’s nowhere else I want to be.” Clarke responded looking at Lexa’s lips. She managed to lift her head up just enough to capture Lexa’s lips. Lexa’s grip loosened and her body fell lower to Clarkes.

But to Lexa’s surprised, a couple seconds later and a blur and it was Lexa who was on her back and her hands were pinned. 

“You were saying.” Clarke said being cocky. Clarke lowered herself against Lexa, she felt her heat connect against lexa’s, feeling Lexa’s wetness mixing with her own.

Lexa’s hips buckle for more contact, beginning move with Clarkes as she grinded down on her. 

Clarke watched Lexa in her beauty, the way she closed her eyes at the feeling, watching her wriggle in pleasure below her. But as Lexa’s lips parted to let a moan escape, she saw cold mist leave her mouth as well. Clarke had forgotten how cold it was. The Sun was up, but Lexa had nothing on, not even a blanket. 

Clarke stopped in her actions. “Lex you must be freezing.” She said letting go of her wrists. 

Lexa sat up, as Clarke stayed her in lap. “All I need is you to keep me warm Clarke.” 

As much as she wanted to believe it, she wouldn’t let Lexa be cold. She stood up, and reached out her hand to Lexa. “Come let’s have one last swim before we go and warm you up. 

As they swam, Lexa spoke more on the leaders who would be arriving over the next few days, explaining how they would all stay in the tower and from now on there would be more guards on duty and posted outside their rooms all night, whenever a room was occupied, including her family, skaikru and the others in the coalition. 

It was not long enough until Lexa informed her, they must head back, and that they would eat a late breakfast when they got to the guards. But before Lexa could swim away, Clarke pulled her under the waterfall, taking her into their own private world and showing her just how much she loved her, one last time, before they had to go back to doors and people knocking.

Before Clarke knew it, she was on Cleo and the tower was rising high above her. She caught Lexa’s gaze and smiled over to the women who held her heart.


	32. Chapter Thirty Two

Chapter 32 

Clarke headed straight up to her room, luckily not bumping into anyone. She felt so overwhelmed by the past couple of days, she wanted sometime to herself to soak it all in. Lexa had gone to greet the Clan Leader and said she would be in a meeting with him until dinner, that they were discussing an issue with the trading of their horses across Delphi Land, as the Delphi leader should have also arrived by now.

Clarke decided to have a long soak, and then got out her sketch book. Next to her sketch book, wrapped in a cloth was her father’s watch. Finn had given it her back after the events in the village. She pulled it out and put it on her wrist, she had missed its weight, but for some reason hadn’t been able to put it on until now. Would he be ashamed of who she had become? She shook the thought and began to draw. She wanted to see her father’s face, luckily for her, she had the skill and the memory.

She had asked Lexa for lunch in her room. She wasn’t quite ready to face Octavia, especially after her and Lexa’s absence. Before Clarke knew it, food was on a tray next to her, with her late breakfast she wasn’t particularly hungry, but she picked it over, every now and again as she drew. 

Later in the day she smiled down at her father and gently closed her book, deciding it was time to go talk with Octavia, they needed to look united in front of the other Clans. 

To Clarkes surprise, two guards were stationed outside of her room. Clarke knew Lexa mentioned more guards being around, but surely this was a bit much. Clarke smiled at them politely and headed across the hall to Octavia and Lincolns room, that now also housed one guard.

She knocked gently and Lincoln answered. He smiled at Clarke and stepped aside. 

“I am going to go for a walk before dinner.” Lincoln said before disappearing out of the door. 

Octavia sat on the edge of her bed. Their room was a mirrored room of Clarkes own. 

“Back from your romantic weekend away Clarke?” Octavia asked sarcastically. 

“I am confused, I thought we moved past everything that happened with Lexa?” Clarke said, from where she stood awkwardly in the middle of the room.

“Lexa is a great Commander Clarke, Indra says she is the greatest they have ever known, and more loved by their people that anyone prior. But she is ruthless Clarke, I know it isn’t fair, but it is not just your lives that this will be affecting. What if this ends badly? What would it mean for our people? Have you even thought about anyone but yourself?”

Clarke had enough. “All I have ever done is thought about everyone one else. Is it so awful do this one thing for myself? To have this one thing? For me to be happy Octavia? Did you think of others when you were sneaking around sleeping with the enemy?" Clarke threw at her. “Lexa and I would never let anything that happens between us affect our people, surely you know this.”

“I know you wouldn’t Clarke, but how well do you truly know Lexa? Would you have ever thought she was capable of deserting her allies on the cusp of battle, or letting 250 of her people burn?”

Clarke wasn’t quite sure what to say to that, because no, at the times of those event she wouldn’t have thought Lexa capable of that, so what would stop Lexa from surprising her again? Clarke quickly disregarded that thought, she knew Lexa, she trusted Lexa, she needed to believe that.

“I understand your concerns Octavia but I am not asking you to trust Lexa, I am asking you to trust me?” Clarke asked hopeful.

Octavia took a moment to think. “I do trust you Clarke, all I ask is that you are careful.” 

“I will.” Clarke responded. 

...................

Clarke left Octavia and went up to Lexa’s floor to see if she could steal a few moments of her time before dinner. When she got to the top of the stairs, the sound of music pulled her in the other direction. Her guards had followed her up, but kept their distance behind her. 

As the music got louder, she recognised it as a piano. The melody was beautiful. She came to a door that stood two guards outside of it. Clarke hesitated before one guard nodded at her, to go in. Clarke opened the door, and the previously muffled sound was even more wonderful not it was clear.

Her mouth slightly dropped in ewe that was Lexa. It was now dark outside and the room was lit by several candles. By the window sat a beautiful, deep, wooden piano and sat behind it was Lexa. 

Clarke froze where she stood, hoping not to disturb Lexa as she played. Lexa began to hum along and Clarke closed her eyes, taking in the music.

When the sound stopped, Clarkes eyes slowly opened and were met with green. Clarke stepped closer and joined Lexa on her stool.

“I never knew you could play Lexa, that was incredible.” 

Lexa blushed at Clarkes compliment. “Did you think us too savage to wield instrument Clarke?” Lexa said light heartedly. 

“Something like that.” Clarke half admitted, because really it was true, she never imagined grounders wielding anything but a sword. Polis really had changed the way she thought of them.

“What were you playing?” Clarke asked wondering if it was something she had heard on the ark.

“Just something I have started working on.” Lexa replied acting modest.

“You wrote that? You really are very talented Lexa.”

“Thank you, Clarke.” Lexa smiled.

Clarke leaned in, tilting her head and kissed Lexa gently on the lips. She hated going for so long without them. “I missed you,” Clarke confessed between kisses.

“I missed you too Clarke.”

They continued with their lips locked until it was time for them to go for dinner.

................................

Dinner was polite but no one could deny the heaviness in the air. Clarke really liked the leader of Delphi, she was similar to her mothers age and joined by her partner. She seemed kind to Clarke, however Mikwell, was a lot colder, the only person he seemed interested in talking to was Aria, she wasn’t sure if it was his dislike for sky people, or his general ignorance to anyone but Aria, but he gave Clarke an uneasy feeling.

As the night drew out, many began to retire to bed. Clarke suddenly became very unsure what to do, does she wait until everyone leaves, so it is just her and Lexa, did she wait for Lexa in her room? Did Lexa even plan on staying with her tonight? Clarke just assumed she would after last night but now she doubted herself. Lexa was still deep in conversation with the clan leaders and everyone else had nearly disappeared, so when Aria was saying good night, she decided to join her, leaving just Lexa and the Clan leaders.

“I didn’t know Lexa could play the piano.” Clarke mentioned to Aria as they walked along the hall. 

“She got the musical talent and I got the looks.” Aria said with a wink.

Clarke laughed.

“Sometimes when Polis holds festivals in the square and they have music. Lexa will join and play something for her people. The people go wild for it. They really do adore her.” Aria said in admiration.

Clarke smiled at the thought, she was surprised Lexa did this, she imagined at any event Lexa would be sat in her thrown playing with her knife, it was nice to know she shares that part of herself with her people, not just the fearless commander.

“She used to sing too.” Aria continued lost in memory. “I could never get her to shut up, but no one has heard her sing since her conclave. Costia tried to coax it out of her but even she had no luck.” Aria’s smile began to fade. “The people loved her too. It was a dark day for everyone when we lost her, there was not one person in Polis who did not feel Lexa’s anguish. Azgeda is still very unwelcome in most places for what they did to her.”

“Were you close to her?” was all Clarke could think to say.

“We all grew up together, you will have met her parents in the village. They were not thrilled when Costia followed Lexa to the capital, but they knew there was no stopping her.” Clarke wasn’t quite sure how to feel hearing about Costia, she felt sad for their loss and she quite enjoyed hearing more about Arias and Lexa’s past, she was obviously a huge part of it, so Clarke was more than happy to listen.

They parted on the stairs. Clarke went to her room unsure what else to do, and her guards took their station at her door. She wasn’t even sure if they would let her enter Lexa’s room. She changed into her silk night gown, and tried to wait up, hoping Lexa would come to her. She decided to read some more of Romeo and Juliette as she waited on her bed. 

......................................

The morning light soon brought Clarke out of her slumber. She was annoyed at herself for falling asleep, and felt slightly crushed that Lexa had not come to find her. 

Clarke rolled over to reach for her glass of water on the table by the other side of the bed. 

“Ow Clarke, I like you on top of me, but that hurt.” Lexa said her eyelids still sleepy as she rubbed the spot on her left breast, where Clarke had elbowed her.

“Lexa, I didn’t know you were there, why didn’t you wake me last night?” Lexa lay under the furs in her own night dress. 

Lexa stretched her arms, trying to wake up still. 

“Where else would I be Clarke?” Lexa said turning on her side to face Clarke better. “I would say that I let you sleep, but to be honest with you Clarke, I did try and wake you, you mumbled something about goats and then rolled over back to sleep.”

“Oh.” Clarke said looking slightly embarrassed. “Try harder next time.” Clarke said with a wink.

“hmmm” Lexa said, pulling Clarke closer, “we will just have to make up for lost time now.” She took Clarke in for a heated kiss. 

“I like the sound of that.” Clarke breathed out as they parted, only to re-join their lips instantly.

“And Clarke” Lexa said pulling away with a cheeky smile. “Let’s stick to my room in the future, its much nicer.” Clarke let out a laugh on Lexa’s lips that were once again on hers. Their bodies fitted together.

“I wasn’t sure if your guards would have my head for entering their commanders’ private chambers.” Clarke explained. 

“I have Commanded that you may go wherever you like, whenever you like Clarke. Only you.” Lexa looked at her with pure love and Clarke’s heart sang to the beat that was Lexa. 

..................................

The day’s a head was similar. They took every stolen moment they could together, from strolls in the gardens, to secret kisses in the shadows. The nights were theirs and theirs alone. They barely slept, choosing the time with each other over the pull of sleep. 

Clarke soon had all of her belongs in Lexa’s room. Aria told her that there were whispers about Wanheda and Heda. Her and Lexa had yet to discuss others knowing, for now they were enjoying keeping it just for them. There was no denying the guards knew, not from the sounds that escaped the door at night, but Clarke didn’t care, she was even starting to like her new guards. She had even spent a few hours playing chess, whilst Lexa was occupied in meetings, with one of the guards named, Timpson. She had promised him that Lexa wouldn’t find out, of course she came back to only one guard at the door. Her death glare sent Timpson knocking over the whole game. It didn’t take long for Clarke to calm her down, she knew Lexa was just worried for her safety, especially now that all Clan leaders had arrived, all apart from Azgeda that is, who’s ambassador will fill in if the Queen does not show, which left Clarke uneasy. She would feel like her people were safer if the queen was here, so she could keep an eye on her.

Each day Lexa was busier in meetings with other clan leaders, so Clarke spent most of her time either with her friends or Aria and her family. At times she even forgot everything going on, the pending threat with Azgeda, their missing people, it felt like she was back on the farm and all she had to think about was what was she doing in that moment. Preferably she was doing Lexa.

She longed for the summit to officially begin, so they could take their place as the thirteenth clan, and Clarke could finally relax, her people would be safe. But as much as she wanted the day to arrive, she also wanted longer. Her nor Lexa had mentioned it, although it meant a chance at a future for them, their future would not be now, not yet, Clarke would have to go back to tell her people and make sure they were really safe and that the farm station prisoners, if any were alive were safely returned. She was not sure how long it would take before she felt content leaving Arkadia. She always imagined she would return to the farm if they would have her, but now Clarke saw only returning to Lexa.


	33. Chapter Thirty Three

Chapter 33

It was the morning, the day before the summit and Clarke was awoken by lips pressed to her temple and then the feeling of the cool air, hitting where the lips had left a little moisture. 

Before those lips could fully escape, Clarke managed to clasp an arm, so they couldn’t get away any further. 

A little chuckle travelled through the morning air. “Clarke, I told you, I cannot be late for breakfast again, the other Clan leaders are noticing and it is becoming less and less of a secret where we lay our heads at night. The last thing we want is for them to question me at the summit, believing I am only inviting you to join my coalition for well ... more personal reasons. I have the right to say no to any Clan joining, but it is a majority vote for a new clan to join.”

“Whose daft idea was that.” 

Lexa rolled her eyes, “you know it was mine.”

“Just for five minutes.” Clarke pleaded, looking at Lexa with sad eyes, like she had not listened to a work Lexa had just said. Lexa was fully dressed, her hair pulled back in her usual pattern, black trousers hung off of her every curve perfectly and she wore Clarkes favourite lace top, that tied at the back of her neck revealing her shoulders, which never seemed to stay tied for too long whenever she wore it and Clarke was around. 

Clarke could see Lexa’s internal debate, glancing at the door then back at where Clarke held her wrist tightly. Clarke held up a fur against her chest with her other hand, she was naked as they usually slept, her hair completely loose after the bath they had taken the night before.

Clarke knew herself that she had lied, if Lexa got back in, there was no way she was going to make it to breakfast on time. But she seemed to care very little of anyone but Lexa in that moment. 

Lexa’s face pulled into a smile and her arm went slack as she gave in, orientating back towards Clarke. 

Lexa’s lips soon found their rightful place against Clarkes. Her hand running around the back of Clarkes neck to bring her closer as Lexa’s other hand went to rest beside Clarke’s head on the pillow, to hold her up as Clarke lay back down, below her.

Clarke let go of her lips and looked in to her eyes. God, she loved this woman.

“I want to give you something.” Clarke sat up slightly and read over to her bag that was beside the bed. Lexa fell on to her side, on the other side of Clarke in her movement. 

Lexa’s mouth dropped slightly, as Clarke twisted back around holding her Fathers watch in her hands.

“Clarke, I cannot, it is the most important thing in this world to you.” Lexa insisted, sounding slightly breathless at what Clarke was offering. 

Clarke pulled Lexa’s hand towards her and slid the watch onto Lexa’s right wrist and fastened it tightly on. “You are the most important thing in this world to me Lexa.” 

Lexa was speechless, looking from the watch to Clarke.

“I want you to have it to always remind you of how much I love you. It’s my promise to you of our future. Something that will make you think of me.” Clarke said, slightly scared and surprised by herself, of just how much she was putting her heart on her sleeve.

“I never stop thinking of you Clarke.” Was all Lexa said in gratitude, as their lips and bodies once more collided. 

It wasn’t long before Clarkes hands were slowly sneaking up to untie Lexa’s top at the back of her neck. Lexa’s hand caught on Clarkes behind her before Clarke could finish. “Clarke!” Lexa said disapprovingly, but with the glint of playfulness in her eyes. 

“Ok, ok” Clarke visibly put her hands up between them where she lay, Lexa hovering over her. 

Just as she lifted up to connect their lips, the doors bashed open. Lexa was gone from her in a second, now stood between her and the door with her sword up and ready, pointing directly at the intruder.

“Bellamy,” Clarke said shakily, not believing what she was seeing. And from the shock and hurt on his face, he felt the same. She clutched the furs tightly against her chest and she could see as he put two and two together, looking between her and Lexa. But what was the most disturbing was the gun he held and the woman in front of him who he had it pointed at. Dauriel.

The moment of shock wore off and Clarke pulled on her robe, tying it closed messily. The tension was high in the air, the two guards stood with their swords drawn, ready on the commander’s orders. But Clarke knew Lexa would not risk anything with her mum in the crossfire, nor would the guards, which is how he must have gotten past. 

“Bellamy, what are you doing here.” Clarke said approaching him slowly, taking a quick glance to Dauriel who stood there like she was annoyed Noah had not done his chores. 

Bellamy just stood there looking confused. But before Clarke could speak again, in a flash Dauriel threw her head back, head butting Bellamy, causing blood to splatted across his face, from what Clarke assumed was a broken nose. She managed to get a few feet away from him, until she froze when she heard a click of the gun. Loading the bullet into the chamber. 

With the new gapped formed Clarke was there in a second, between Bellamy and Dauriel. She could see Lexa tense at her action, and glanced at her, to see an annoyance by her actions in her eyes as well as a silent plea to not do anything stupid. 

But without a second thought she walked up to the gun that was outstretched at her. She placed a hand on his wrist, using it to lower the gun. “Hey, it’s ok, Bell, tell me what’s happened?” Clarke said softly, concerned to what had driven him to this. When the gun pointed at the floor Clarke took it from him. 

She saw the instant movements from Lexa and her guards closing in, and Clarkes eyes flew to Lexa’s begging her to give her a minute.

Lexa paused in her stride and held a hand up to halt the guards.

Clarke looked back at Bellamy, waiting for him to say something. “I thought you were in trouble Clarke; we couldn’t reach you on the radio and you were only supposed to be gone for a few days. I thought the worst.” His eyes were full of sadness, but soon Clarke saw them turn to something else and his features hardened. “Clearly I was wrong.” He said with a cold look shooting over her shoulder to look at Lexa. 

When he met Clarkes eyes again, he asked in a whisper. “Clarke, I swear if she made you –” 

“She didn’t” Clarke responded quickly. 

“The commander has offered us to join the coalition, under her protection Ice nation cannot touch us or they will be breaking the rules of the coalition. This is happening tomorrow and then I was coming straight back.” Clarke explained her absence.

“It doesn’t look like you were in too much of a hurry to me.” He said with bitterness. 

Clarke saw something else flash across his face.

“Bellamy? What haven’t you told me?” Clarke asked, dread filling her, she knew there must be more for him to come here.

“Joining the coalition tomorrow isn’t soon enough. Azgeda marches as we speak on Arkadia, they are about a day or two away Clarke. The camp is in chaos, half the people want to fight, the other half want to run. We have no leader Clarke. Marcus and Miller...” Clarke could see tears build in Bellamy’s eyes as he looked like he was about to break. 

“What about them?” Clarke demanded, already starting to feel sick at what was happening, as she lay here hidden away. 

“They went out on a scouting mission.” Clarke could tell it was hard for Bellamy to get the words out, she knew what Miller meant to him, and how Marcus had taken Bellamy under his wing. “The Ice Queen has them Clarke. Simon made it back, he said her could hear their screams. She is torturing them Clarke; they could be dead already.”

“No, they are more valuable to Azgeda alive, at least until after the war, she will do what she can to get any information from them before she attacks.” Clarke heard Lexa reveal instantly, a thousand plans already beginning to form in her head.

Clarke swung around to where Dauriel waited and listened. “Dauriel, you will never know how sorry I am that you got caught up in this.”

“It is ok Clarke, the boy cares for you, he thought you were in Danger.” Dauriel simply, no malice in her voice.

“Clarke. I cannot just let this stand.” Lexa said dominating the room. “He threatened my mother with a weapon, breached the tower into the Commanders personal bedchamber armed. I cannot let it go unpunished.” 

Clarke wasn’t sure what to say, she knew where Lexa was coming from, but she wouldn’t let Bellamy just be thrown in the dungeon. She saw the fear appear on Bellamy’s face at Lexa’s words, clearly not understanding the severity of what he had just done, probably not knowing it was the commander’s mother, he had taken as hostage, nor the room he was entering into.

Before Clarke could begin her argument, Lexa would have no doubt, knew was coming. Dauriel stepped in. 

“Sweetheart, the boy has obviously gone through a lot, he feared the worst about someone he loves.” Clarke saw Lexa’s jaw twitch at that part. “The crime was against me, there are much bigger problems to resolve right now and you know yourself Lexa, you would have done the same, but probably not left anyone alive in your path to Clarke.” Bellamy looked a lot more skittish after hearing the last part, and was no longer standing so proud.

“He has no weapons whilst in Polis and he will have guards escort him until he leaves.” Lexa said, not looking happy about it.

“Thank you.” Clarke told her. 

“Timpson, Loth, will you please escort Bellamy to Octavia’s room I will be along shortly.” Clarke said the last part more to Bellamy. The guards looked over to their commander at Clarke’s words. With a nod from Lexa, they escorted Bellamy out. But before he was fully out of the door, he turned to Dauriel. “I am truly sorry; my intention was never to harm you.”

Dauriel gave him a smile in acceptance and the doors soon closed behind him. The room grew heavy.

A few moments passed, both Lexa and Clarke deep in thought. 

“So much for my morning stroll outside.” Dauriel said breaking the silence. “I better go check on Noah.” 

Soon it was just Clarke and Lexa. 

Clarke stepped towards Lexa. 

“Lexa we can’t wait until tomorrow, we have to have the summit now.” Clarke said in desperation and panic.

“It’s not that simple Clarke.” Lexa said calmly.

“Make it that simple!” Clarke said raising her voice. Silence fell.

“I’m sorry, I’m just worried for my people, they might not survive until tomorrow.” Clarke said more gently, stepping closer to Lexa and rubbing a thumb across her upper arm.

Lexa closed her eyes at Clarkes touch. “I feel so luckily Clarke, like you have already given me more happiness than what I could ask for in a life time. Yet I want to be selfish and have more.” Lexa uttered whilst her eyes remained closed.

Clarke closed the gap between them and gave Lexa a soft, longing kiss. “Whatever happens in that meeting Lexa’s, nothing will ever change the way I feel about you.” 

Clarke took her into her arms and Lexa relaxed against her body. “I will call for the meeting at noon, Clarke.” Lexa said into Clarke’s ear as they held each other. 

Clarke pulled back and captured Lexa’s lips one last time as a thank you. “I better go find the others and hear more from Bellamy.” Clarke said approaching the door. 

“ermm, Clarke.” Lexa said with an eye brow raised and an amused smile finding its way onto Lexa’s face. “aren’t you forgetting something.”

Clarke turned to Lexa and gave her one more deep kiss, “I love you” She said before turning back to the door.

“I love you too Clarke, but I was referring to your clothes.” Lexa said with a laugh. 

“Ahh right, yes those.” Clarke said heading to a draw, she put the gun she was still holding from Bellamy onto a table and quickly got dressed. 

“I am already not Bellamy’s biggest fan with the way he looks at you, I would much rather you stay fully dressed around him. I think he cares for you romantically.” 

“Yeah, I know.” Was all Clarke said from where she was pulling a grey long sleeved tight top over her head.

“You know?”

“Yeah, he told me.”

“He told you?” Lexa replied back.

As Clarke finished dressing, she pulled on Lexa’s jacket and walked towards her. “Are you just going to continue to repeat what I say Lex?” Clarke said amused, slightly enjoying this. “You know Lexa, I never had you down for the jealous type.

“I am not jealous Clarke, just observant.” Lexa replied defensively, folding her arms in front of her.

“mmmhmmmm, whatever you say.” Clarke left a quick peck on Lexa’s pout as Clarke passed her to the door. “Don’t worry, jealousy looks hot on you.” And with a wink, Clarke was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So when I first began writing this, I tried to think of a title to go with each chapter but somewhere along this stopped. Now it is coming to an end, I intend on going back to change this. So if anyone has any ideas, please let me know the chapter number and your thought in the comments! I tried to use ones that wouldn't give too much of the chapter away!


	34. Chapter Thirty Four

Chapter 34

She found Bellamy on a chair, with a very annoyed Octavia storming back and forth throughout the room at what an idiot her brother had been.

Bellamy told them about the unrest in camp and how things were falling apart fast, how Miller and Marcus and three other guards got captured as well as how he used a motorcycle Raven had fixed to get here. 

Clarke informed them on the meeting happening soon and that they should be prepared to leave as soon as it ended. Lincoln and Octavia, went to fill Jasper and Monty in on what was happening. Leaving Clarke and Bellamy in an awkward silence.

“I am sorry Clarke, I didn’t intend to hurt her, I didn’t even know she was the commander’s mother.”

Clarke felt anger wash over her at the memory.

“Even if she was someone else, it is someone’s life you threatened Bellamy!” She said annoyed pacing in front of him. 

“You have no idea how lucky you are that your not being strung up in the courtyard!” Clarke brought her hands to her temples in frustration. She knew Bellamy wouldn’t have intended to hurt Dauriel, but what if Bellamy couldn’t find Clarke, what if he acted in desperation and harmed her, or if the trigger slipped. Clarke felt sick at the thought.

She stilled and took a deep breath, she needed to stay calm, the meeting was what she needed to focus on now.

“Dauriel is not just Lexa’s mother Bell. She’s Aria’s.” Clarke said more calmly. Bellamy looked up where his head was hung in surprise. He knew what Aria and her family meant to her, he knew they gave her a home. 

“If you ever threaten any of my family again, I won’t protect you from Lexa next time.” 

Clarke left leaving Bellamy to realise just how much he hurt Clarke in his actions as well as Lexa and Dauriel.

Clarke went to find Aria and tell her everything that happened. She was pretty pissed at Bellamy, but she understood why he did it and was just relieved her mother wasn’t hurt.

..............................................................

Before Clarke knew it, she was at the doors to the throne room. As the doors were opened for her, she stepped in and all eyes were on her. Lexa was sat on her throne, powerful as ever and all the leaders and the Azgeda Ambassador had a seat each in a circle around the room. 

Clarke carefully stepped further in, until she was in the centre facing Lexa. She knew she had to kneel; Lexa had told her. The leaders truly had to believe that the mighty Wanheda had kneeled before Heda, for this to go ahead. 

She felt all eyes on her, she had met most of them over the past few days, but as more arrived, she didn’t want them to feel uncomfortable by her and her people, so they had started eating elsewhere. She knew the they were intimidated and impressed with her triumph at the mountain, doing what no one before her could, but she also knew, some had less gratitude to her for it, mainly the clans that were so far away, they never experience the turmoil of Mount Weather. 

She looked up to Lexa, feeling a calm wash over her, by just being in her presence. And then she kneeled. The room stayed silence.

“Rise Wanheda Kom Skaikru.” It was the voice of the commander that left Lexa.

Clarke rose, meeting Lexa’s eyes once again. “I have explained that you seek to join the coalition as the thirteenth Clan member. The leaders would like to hear from you.” Lexa explained.

Clarke turned so her back was now facing Lexa.

“We are not the mountain.” Clarke began, making sure she reached the eyes of everyone in front of her.

“I understand to you, we may be invaders who look like the mountain men, but we are people who seek a safe home, families, children. We have lived in peace now for months with Trikru, both of our people have prospered from the alliance. We are no threat to you.”

There was a moment of silence and then she continued.

“As you know an army marches on my gates, I do not want anymore bloodshed, surely enough blood has been spilled already in the past. I assume there would be no alliance here, if you did not all seek of a better future yourselves, I ask you to extend that to my people.” Clarke finished. 

They seemed to be considering her words and taking in what she had said. 

Lexa spoke up. “If no one is opposed, I allow Skaikru to join my coalition as the thirteenth clan.” There was no mistaking the emphasis on the ‘I’ and ‘my’. It was a direct threat from Lexa to see who would dare speak against her wishes.

“With the mountain fallen and Skaikru laid waste, our twelve clans can truly live-in peace commander. You are asking us to take a chance, a risk that they will not become a threat, where their deaths would leave us no risk, no chance of them becoming a threat in the future.” The Azgeda ambassador spoke as if Clarke was not there, standing up from where he sat, walking around like he owned the place.

She saw many of the leaders nodding along in agreement. 

“Sangedakru will not join the fight against Skaikru, but I see no reason to stop it. They are not a part of the alliance nor have sought any interest until they were under threat, they are more like the mountain men than us, I agree with Azgeda on this matter.” The leader of the Desert Clan added.

Clarke could see her nervousness behind her words, unsure of Lexa’s actions. “Does anyone else support this?”

No one spoke for a long moment, glancing to one another or deep in thought. But before any of them had the chance to speak. The Ambassador who was still stood continued. “Commander surely you can see what is best for your people and their future generations? Unless you are blinded. If this is your weakness again, Azgeda will happily step in.” A bald man who Clarke had heard Lexa speak of as Titus, stepped into Lexa’s defence but just as quickly, her hand shot up to silence him.

“I think the bigger question here commander is not if Skaikru should join the alliance, but why is Wanheda even still alive, you should have taken her power by now.” Clarke was beginning to feel nervous, not sure what to do with herself as others discussed her life.

Lexa stood. “I understand your concerns, here come, let me discuss something with you in private.” Lexa motioned to behind her throne that was slightly more private. 

Clarke stepped back in surprise as Lexa so brutally kicked the Azgeda Ambassador off of the tower. 

Lexa reappeared. “Would anyone else care to question my decisions.”

The Clan leaders all looked petrified, not daring to look Lexa in the eye.

“Heda?” The Leader of the Blue Cliff Clan said nervously. “As much as I do not want to meet the same fate as the Azgeda Ambassador, I do see merit in his words... towards the current situation with Skaikru, of course not in regards to your decision with Wanheda... in keeping her alive that is.” If it wasn’t such a dire situation, Clarke might have almost wanted to laugh.

“Very well, you are all welcome to speak your minds.”

It was The Rock Line Leader who dared to speak next. “Skaikru are a threat, I vote against them joining the coalition.”

Clarke could feel things turning against her.

.........................................................................

Clarke fiercely strode into their room, heading straight for her bag and weapons. She wasn’t sure how to feel, everything she had hoped for the past week just crumbled away. But all she could focus on was getting back to her people, she needed to hurry if she was to beat the Azgeda army.

Lexa was quick on her step behind her followed by her guards. 

“Clarke just pause for a second lets talk about this.” Lexa tried to calm her.

“I have to go; I have to save them.” Clarke said pulling her bag on over her jacket and strapping a dagger to her thigh.

“You can’t Clarke.” Clarke froze taken back a little by that.

“Azgeda will have at least 5,000 marching on your camp. You will be slaughtered with them.” Lexa said, concern in her eye. 

“I have to try.” Clarke said, marching past her. But before she could exit, the guards were blocking her path. 

She spun to face Lexa. “What is this.” Lexa walked around her not meeting her eyes, until she stood in front of the guards, also between Clarke and the door.

“I can’t let you do that Clarke.” Lexa said firmly.

Clarke was speechless, she couldn’t believe what was happening right now. “Lexa” Clarke breathed out. Shock written across her face as she realised what Lexa was doing. Soon that shock turned to anger, and Clarke was becoming more furious and agitated. 

“Get out of my way.” Clarke said, clenching her fist. 

“I can live in a world knowing you hate me Clarke, but I can’t live in a world where you don’t exist.” And with that Lexa turned and walked away. 

Clarke could not believe this was happening again, she turned and walked away just like the mountain, deserting Clarke’s people. Clarke felt her heart crack open and she couldn’t breathe. The door closed behind the guards and she heard a key twist on the other side. She felt like she couldn’t take in any air, tears were rolling down her face now. She was having a panic attack. Her heart felt like it just got ripped from her chest. This could not be lexa, she could not betray her again. She felt like she was going to be sick. 

Her bag fell to the floor and it wasn’t long until her legs buckled beneath her and she joined it. Clarke collapsed, sobbing, trying to catch her breathe. She had failed them, her mum, her friends, her people. They would all die and it was all her fault, she shouldn’t have trusted Lexa, she should have been there, to protect them.


	35. Chapter Thirty Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Appologies for the short chapter, I'm posting two to make up for it.

Clarke wasn’t sure how much time had passed, she couldn’t move, all she could do was stay where she was on the floor. Night had fallen, and the room was now consumed in darkness.

Clarke was too lost in the pain; she did not hear the key unclick in the door. 

It took a while for Clarke to register the figure calling to her. “Clarke, Clarke, come on, snap out of it, we don’t have much time.” 

Clarke quickly returned to the present and was being pulled up by her arm by Aria. It took a minute for Clarke to register what was happening. Aria picked up her bag and shoved it into Clarkes arms and turned to the door.

Clarke followed closely behind.

Aria led her down a different set of stairs and out back into the gardens and soon she was in the tunnel she had once used to enter, which felt like a life time ago. 

Clarke saw the rover and the others waiting beside it. But stopped in motion when Aria didn’t not press forward. 

“You’re not coming?” Clarke managed to speak.

“Lexa may be pissed at me for getting you out Clarke, but it would be unforgivable if I joined you in battle against a member of the coalition.” Clarke nodded in understanding and reached out to take Aria’s wrist. Aria took Clarke’s risk in return. 

“May we meet again.” Clarke told her. It would be the first time in months without Aria. As Aria repeated the words back and loosened her grip, Clarke pulled her in for a hug. “Thank you.” She said into Aria’s hair. 

“Try not to die.” Aria joked back. Aria never failed to make Clarke smile, even in her darkest moments, and this had to be her darkest yet. She never knew something could hurt this much. It was nothing like the mountain, it was even different than when she lost her father. She felt her entire self-shatter. 

Clarke turned towards the rover, as Aria disappeared into the night. She took a deep breath, ready to swallow everything she was feeling. She had to save her people, it is all she could let herself think of right now.

Hours past and no one spoke, it was a different ride back than it had been coming here. As things became familiar Octavia spoke up. “What is the plan Clarke?” Everyone looked at her expectantly. A look she has seen too many times before, and once again she felt the weight of the lives of those around her. 

She continued looking at the dagger that she was turning in her hand. “We kill them. We kill them all.” She said simply, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

.........

The gates opened as they approached. Clarke let out a sigh of relief to see Azgeda had yet to attack.

The Rover skidded to a stop in the centre, outside of the Ark. Flood lights lit everywhere, including the surrounding tree line, searching for an attack, which they knew was coming. It seemed most people were outside. As Clarke existed the vehicle, eyes began to land on her and the camp became still. It looked like a lot were packing. 

Arms were quickly wrapped around her and she was taken into her hug by Raven. She let Raven hug her for a minute, not realising how much she needed it right now.

Raven smiled as they parted. “I failed Raven; our only option is to fight.” Clarke said disappointment with herself in her voice. 

“Then we fight.” She nodded. “Your mum and other council members are going over options in the council room. But I would be more concerned with the people. They are scared Clarke, many are about to run, they need someone they can look to, someone to guide them in our hour of darkness.” Clarke understood what Raven was asking. The people had gone about what they were doing as Clarke had been speaking to Raven. She could see fear written across their faces, those still looking at her, look in hope.

Clarke turned and pulled herself up, so she was now stood on top of the rover. She had pulled her hair back on the journey home so it was now up in a pony tail out of her face but a couple of loose strands. People had already begun to quiet and face her as they noticed her stand tall above them. 

It wasn’t long before silence fell on camp, the only movement was of the flames that also helped to light up the camp. Her mother and a few others fell out of the ark at its entrance, they must have been notified of Clarkes arrival. 

“I know you are scared. An army marches on our camp. But it is not us who should be afraid. We are more powerful than they could ever imagine.” Clarke made sure looked at her people in the eye. Her voice was strong, determined and powerful. “On my way here, I was thinking... why are they attacking?” Clarke paused again, seeing some people begin to wander themselves. “They are attacking because they fear us, because we are a threat, like the mountain men. We are not the mountain men. We are not grounders. We are better.” People were now beginning to nodded along with her words, fear appearing less and less on their faces. 

“But they were right about one thing, they should be afraid, we have not only powerful weapons but powerful minds. It does not matter if they sent the arm of the twelve clans against us, it is us who will be left standing, it is us who will have victory. I ask you to stand with me, to fight with me.” Yells rung out in agreement. “Tomorrow Azgeda meets the same fate as the mountain!” Clarke yelled above the crowd. Cheers and yells vibrated through the camp, roaring it to life. People were no longer afraid; they were ready for war!


	36. Epilogue

Epilogue 

~ Lexa

It had been three days since Clarke left. She hadn’t slept, or eaten, she couldn’t until she knew Clarke was ok. She now sat in her throne, with the clan leaders once again circled around her. 

“Any Skaikru who seek sanctuary in Polis will be granted it, as all who live here live under my protection and mine alone.” Lexa reminded them. “If Skaikru survive the attack from Azgeda, or escape in time and arrive here, they will become the thirteenth Clan, any who still disagree are welcome to leave my alliance, all trade will be halted and they will stand alone from that point forward, of course they will be welcome in Polis always, I am your Heda, whether you are in the alliance or not, but you will forfeit any of the agreements within the alliance.” Lexa knew it was unlikely anyone would leave; since the coalition began, all clans had thrived. 

“I have sent word to Indra to inform Skaikru of this and Trikru will escort those of Skaikru who want to, to the safety of ...”

Before Lexa could finish the doors were opened by her guards. Titus came in followed by a young boy, around the age of 15, Lexa instantly recognised him by his scars and fur clothes as Azgeda. She felt like she had just been stabbed, if she was not already sitting, she would have already buckled over at the sight of him. This could only mean one thing, Skaikru were defeated.

“Heda, sorry to interrupt but an urgent message has arrived, with news of the attack.”

Lexa’s heart clenched. She swallowed her fear and gave a nod, not being able to speak.

The boy strode forward, but it looked like he was practically shaking. He put his hand into his bag that was hung over his shoulder at the side of him and pulled out a mass of blonde hair, followed by a severed head, and threw it into the centre of the circle, towards Lexa’s feet.

Lexa’s hands clenched around the arms of her chair. She was about to be sick. Not again she thought. But then she saw the blue eyes staring back, and they did not belong to the woman she loved, but the woman she despised.

“She said I would live if I delivered this messaged to you Heda.” The boy spoke.

“Who?” A leader asked, shocked by what he saw.

He pulled out a letter.

To the Leaders of the clans and their commander,

We never wanted an alliance out of fear we would lose. We never wanted an alliance for protection. We are more powerful than those you feared for generations in the mountain, but we are not caged. 

We wanted to join the coalition to create a better future, one where no one has to live in fear. We wanted to join the coalition so we could show you mercy, to show Azgeda mercy. So that I no longer had to command death. 

You chose fear instead of hope. You made an enemy, when you could have found your greatest ally. You chose war instead of peace. 

If any of your people step foot within five miles of Arkadia, they will be killed where they stand. If any, from any clan, threaten or harm any of my people. 

I Wanheda, will declare war on the entire coalition and you will meet the same fate as the Queen.

Again, showing you mercy

Wanheda  
Leader of the Sky People

\- The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know what you guys are thinking.... How can it be over? It can't just be the end? 
> 
> Well don't worry because it's not! 
> 
> Part 2 is coming and when I say coming, the first chapter will be posted tomorrow and then continuing daily like I have been!
> 
> Thank you all again for continuing to follow the story. Please let me know your thoughts on how I ended it!


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